Cast: Ralph Fiennes, Stanley Tucci, John Lithgow, Isabella Rossellini, Carlos Diehz, Lucian Msamati, Brían F. O'Byrne, Merab Ninidze, Sergio Castellitto, Jacek Koman, Rony Kramer, Joseph Mydell, Thomas Loibl, Jeremy Withrow, Loris Loddi
Release: 2024-10-31
Plot: Cardinal Lawrence is tasked with leading one of the world's most secretive and ancient events, selecting a new Pope. Once the Catholic Church’s most powerful leaders have gathered from around the world and are locked together in the Vatican halls, Lawrence finds himself at the center of a conspiracy and discovers a secret that could shake the very foundation of The Church.
It is a gorgeous movie. Seeing that Indian Paintbrush was a part of the production credits is very apparent. No idea how everything connects inside movie making land but the movie has the look of many of their films. Acting is also very good. FIennes, Lithgow, Tucci, they all do a great job. The drama is also pretty good and the mystery stuff behind the selection of the Pope, the politics, the scheming, all make for a pretty compelling story and a world most of us don't know much about. I have no idea or preconceptions about any of it, the Pope, Catholics, whatever so came into it just to see how it was as a movie.
That was for about 1hr35m. Then the end... I'm just going to spoiler it, so seriously don't read it if you don't want spoilers.
It does a pretty good job, to the extent it can given the setting, of staying out of its own way and not getting bogged down in overly religious or political debate. We know there are two basic factions within the College. One that would like to see a return to a more traditional belief system and the other more progressive faction that better aligns with the previous Pope.
That’s all fine and works. You need opposing sides. Fiennes’ character as the Dean has a preference but we see Cardinals representing both sides lose support and votes as the viable candidate become fewer. It was really good as its own little Agatha Christie’esque mystery and intrigue. Catholics and others probably have 1,000 different complaints, I don’t know. Seemed fine to me.
Really it just falls apart at the last 15 minutes, to me. Fiennes and Wozniak, as the last remaining candidates, have a debate in front of a group of Cardinals about tolerance of other religion’s and the Church / next Pope’s roll in all that. This is where it veered off for me and really became overtly and specifically political as if to push a message, rather than being its own self contained thing.
A third Cardinal stands up and gives a three sentence speech admonishing Wozniak and everyone’s understanding of the way the world really works. Basically calls them self centered white guys. And then is magically elected Pope next scene. There’s just no good anything there to tie it together. Like any other lazily written movie where one emotional monologue makes everyone see the error of their ways and everything is beautiful.
and then in the last 5 minutes Fiennes gets this new information that the Kabul Cardinal (now Pope) went to Geneva for an operation. So he confronts new Pope in the changing room where he’s told that, surprise, Pope has XY chromosomes and was going to Geneva to have a laparoscopic hysterectomy but decided not to at the last minute because she’s beautiful the way God made her and she can’t change that. It is totally out of nowhere. Oh, and the previous Pope was aware before his passing and totally okay with it. And then Fiennes is okay with it and lights the votes on fire, the people see smoke, and we hear cheers. End scene.
It does a pretty good job, to the extent it can given the setting, of staying out of its own way and not getting bogged down in overly religious or political debate. We know there are two basic factions within the College. One that would like to see a return to a more traditional belief system and the other more progressive faction that better aligns with the previous Pope.
That’s all fine and works. You need opposing sides. Fiennes’ character as the Dean has a preference but we see Cardinals representing both sides lose support and votes as the viable candidate become fewer. It was really good as its own little Agatha Christie’esque mystery and intrigue. Catholics and others probably have 1,000 different complaints, I don’t know. Seemed fine to me.
Really it just falls apart at the last 15 minutes, to me. Fiennes and Wozniak, as the last remaining candidates, have a debate in front of a group of Cardinals about tolerance of other religion’s and the Church / next Pope’s roll in all that. This is where it veered off for me and really became overtly and specifically political as if to push a message, rather than being its own self contained thing.
A third Cardinal stands up and gives a three sentence speech admonishing Wozniak and everyone’s understanding of the way the world really works. Basically calls them self centered white guys. And then is magically elected Pope next scene. There’s just no good anything there to tie it together. Like any other lazily written movie where one emotional monologue makes everyone see the error of their ways and everything is beautiful.
and then in the last 5 minutes Fiennes gets this new information that the Kabul Cardinal (now Pope) went to Geneva for an operation. So he confronts new Pope in the changing room where he’s told that, surprise, Pope has XY chromosomes and was going to Geneva to have a laparoscopic hysterectomy but decided not to at the last minute because she’s beautiful the way God made her and she can’t change that. It is totally out of nowhere. Oh, and the previous Pope was aware before his passing and totally okay with it. And then Fiennes is okay with it and lights the votes on fire, the people see smoke, and we hear cheers. End scene.
The ending of Conclave feels inconsistent with Cardinal Lawrence’s earlier actions. Throughout the movie, he exposes other candidates' secrets, such as corruption and past scandals, in his pursuit of transparency. However, when he discovers Cardinal Benitez is intersex, he stays silent. This is bullshit given his prior insistence on honesty and reform. While the situation is different—Benitez has already been chosen, and the consequences would be more severe—it would be more logical that Lawrence’s commitment to honesty would still drive him to act, even at great cost.
yeah, fuck this movie. Its slow and just "people talking" for about 90 mins, and its interesting in a "politics using just papers and words, no violence" kind of old-school politics way.
but then the last 15 minutes is ludicrously woke and stupid and you suddenly understand why all these high powered actors decided to make a movie about a subject thats been covered a billion ways.
don't bother with the movie at all, its forgettable and will not be talked about at all in 3 years. Spoilers for the twist/plot, full spoilers
so a younger, poor Mexican priest (full native Mexican looking, like poster boy for Taco Trucks) is admitted last minute to the new election of a Pope, and he is the Archbishop of Afghanistan (lol) and it was done in secret by the dead Pope so he could ?? move around in Afghanistan without being killed ?? I guess this movie implies the Taliban are stupid as fuck because guess what, you aren't hiding any Christians in Afghanistan or any Sharia country lol
anyways most of the movie is a power play between a black candidate and a few white candidates, one of whom is basically Trump and the other is Clinton or Obama. There is a muslim terrorist attack on the ceiling and around Europe (lol) and one candidate wants to make The Vatican Great Again and the newbie Mexican makes a speech about how war sucks, everyone here is focused on power, the Church should be for God and the people, blah blah blah. No real shock and its obvious from the beginning, the newb Mexican is gonna be elected Pope.
Here's the shamalayamadingdong fucking retarded twist. Turns out the mexican is actually a hermaphrodite and has a uterus and I assume wang. and the old pope knew and was cool with it LOL. So the movie basically just ends with the new Pope being a lady boy and the couple of people who know keep it a secret. Girl power, or something.
Hermaphrodite is way different than a tranny - and people forget- only 1 or none of the sex organs work in hermaphrodites - you can have a vag and a dong but only working balls or overies not both - and generally what “work” is what you “look like” and what your XY combo is
There was like ONE medically “proven” “woman” who had both that worked and gave normal birth to another female child that had both that they assumed worked- but its some really obscure medical “letter” - you would think someone like that would have been paid an untold amount of money to be a medical guinepig etc… but its some subnote that trannies all clamor to “LOOK LOOK NATURE!” Bull
yeah, fuck this movie. Its slow and just "people talking" for about 90 mins, and its interesting in a "politics using just papers and words, no violence" kind of old-school politics way.
but then the last 15 minutes is ludicrously woke and stupid and you suddenly understand why all these high powered actors decided to make a movie about a subject thats been covered a billion ways.
don't bother with the movie at all, its forgettable and will not be talked about at all in 3 years. Spoilers for the twist/plot, full spoilers
so a younger, poor Mexican priest (full native Mexican looking, like poster boy for Taco Trucks) is admitted last minute to the new election of a Pope, and he is the Archbishop of Afghanistan (lol) and it was done in secret by the dead Pope so he could ?? move around in Afghanistan without being killed ?? I guess this movie implies the Taliban are stupid as fuck because guess what, you aren't hiding any Christians in Afghanistan or any Sharia country lol
anyways most of the movie is a power play between a black candidate and a few white candidates, one of whom is basically Trump and the other is Clinton or Obama. There is a muslim terrorist attack on the ceiling and around Europe (lol) and one candidate wants to make The Vatican Great Again and the newbie Mexican makes a speech about how war sucks, everyone here is focused on power, the Church should be for God and the people, blah blah blah. No real shock and its obvious from the beginning, the newb Mexican is gonna be elected Pope.
Here's the shamalayamadingdong fucking retarded twist. Turns out the mexican is actually a hermaphrodite and has a uterus and I assume wang. and the old pope knew and was cool with it LOL. So the movie basically just ends with the new Pope being a lady boy and the couple of people who know keep it a secret. Girl power, or something.
I don't mind a drama that is all conversations. I didn't dislike this one until the end. Im not saying it was really good. It wasn't. But it wasn't bad enough to turn off. That being said, the last 5 minutes just blow the movie up. If you watch it, turn it off after the final vote. You will thank me.
