Engagement rings

I'm interested to hear Tuco's stance on kids since there is absolutely zero tangible benefit and just a ton of cost

Draegan_sl said:

I had a great wedding and it cost just south of $20k. Paid about 92/person that included taxes and tip and cake. An extra grand for the room for the ceremony. Open bar. The rest of the expenses come out to the dress, flowers (don't spend a lot here, I spent around $650 or so) and all the little shit you have to do along the way that adds up like the rehersal dinner, hotels, transport, favors, minister/officiant etc. etc.

I paid for it on my own and got my money back plus a little more.

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Holy shit. I think we paid in the neighborhood of $600-700 for ours. The bulk of that was the reception where we took everyone out to eat and spent like $450. I want to say we had 14 people total.

I definitely recommend going small. Not only that, but my wife's family gave us $5,000 that they could've spent on the wedding.

Tenks_sl said:

I'm interested to hear Tuco's stance on kids since there is absolutely zero tangible benefit and just a ton of cost

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Tummy Time is just lazy time. They could be making 80c an hour stitching Nike clothes!

It's not about the cost, Tuco. It's about the time. If you haven't had your first one yet, her personality will radically change after a few kids. Mostly for the better. After our 2nd, mine asked the nurse if the OR was available for tube tying that evening. But seriously I couldn't handle chasing three fucking kids around, not to mention all the activities.

The money is the least of my problems, luckily. It's not letting one feel cheated over the other with how much personal attention/time they get with us.

Tuco_sl said:

Wedding costs are as dumb as diamonds. It's an entire industry built on convincing girls to spend daddy's money. I planned my wedding and it was the best shit ever and I made a profit off it. Women are bad at shopping in general, but they go full retard when it comes to weddings.

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my wife's dad is dead and didn't pay a dime for our wedding. So I should have bought a moissanite instead of a diamond right?

Not at all, but your insinuation about weddings and daddy's money isn't true for everyone.

then I stuck in the moissanite comment because you are such an insufferable douche about it

The irony is that everything Tuco hates about diamonds seems to be true of moissanite. Except they're just cheaper. Unless you really want to be a pretentious ass and get on your soapbox by claiming to be cheap because you're concerned about African slaves.

Got my wife a diamond, no not 3 months pay, but more than one. She loves it, her family loves it ( sisters etc ). Her friends love it. Happy wife, happy life. Plus you can have the most "down to earth homely girl who would take a twine knot around her finger" but the moment you guys get in an argument you're a cheap skate. Just sayin', women be crazy bro's.

There's a lot of things you guys over pay for or items / things you do that aren't "necessary to have / do"...So why get pissy about the one thing that your wife will hopefully have forever / turn into a family heirloom.

The right girl isn't going to give a fuck what you give her, even if it's a ring pop. But if you're not a douche, you want to do right by her, her family, her friends, etc... I cringe when I read posts about some of these girls who haven't quite grown up yet that are concerned about what their friends think of their ring as the major selling point.

Tenks_sl said:

The irony is that everything Tuco hates about diamonds seems to be true of moissanite. Except they're just cheaper. Unless you really want to be a pretentious ass and get on your soapbox by claiming to be cheap because you're concerned about African slaves.

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pretty much. Watching him try to take a shit on the cubic zirconia guy was lulzy. For me at least. @eya- I spit tea across my desk just now thanks. I don't recall a time when ive seen you call someone a douche. Least recently.

People that spend $25k, $50k, and up on weddings are just doing it to either say they did so, or because they have parents who just throw money at their spoiled brat kids. Anyone who feels like they need to drop that kind of cash is fooling themselves.

For me, I was never the kind of guy who wanted to go through an elaborate wedding and ceremony but things change as you grow older. My fiance was married once already and after hearing what a terrible experience her first wedding was (stupid Irish Catholic traditions and MIL bullshit) I wanted her to have the day she always dreamed of, and I wanted to celebrate our marriage with our close friends and family.

We're getting married May 3rd in Myrtle Beach. Technically a "destination" wedding but not a far trip for many of the attendees. We're keeping it under 75 people, doing most of the planning or organizing ourselves, doing favors, table decor etc ourselves. All in, it's probably barely above $10k of our own money we're in for? And it's only that high because it's destination and we couldn't do the big stuff (cake, flowers, etc) ourselves. It's at my parents country club so we got the venue for nothing. My father is our officiant.

To step back, I did all the research for her ring myself. I didn't want her input or suggestions. If I don't know the girl enough to ask her to marry me, why would I be considering an engagement? I feel like if guys need the girls help for a decision like that, it's not the the right time. So I put some time into learning diamonds. Knowing what the levels of cut, clarity, color and weight meant. If I can spent months min/max'ing my Rogue's gear in WoW I can spend a few weeks researching quality gems that she'll wear forever. I ended up getting a great education from a local jeweler who went with me to a few places to show me how they overprice and scam poor sucker guys into thinking they're getting a good deal. Her ring is an Ideal Cut, H color, VVS1 at just under 1.25 carat. It's perfect for her hand/finger size. Nothing too gawdy or extravagant where it's an obvious "OMG STARE AT MY RING" piece. But it's also the ring she's going to wear the rest of her life, so it's worth putting the effort and a little coin into. I didn't even spend $4k on her ring and it's certified for $15k. Oh yes, and guysget the certificates and insure the ring. Don't be a moron or cheapskate on this.

All in all, everyones engagement and wedding experience is their own decision. What's right for me won't be right for anyone else. But in the end if you're TRULY happy, not just having to explain WHY you're happy, then you'll know it's right. And this one is.

Mythas_sl said:

There's a lot of things you guys over pay for or items / things you do that aren't "necessary to have / do"...So why get pissy about the one thing that your wife will hopefully have forever / turn into a family heirloom.

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This is a pretty good point. Sure engagement rings may be overpriced but at the end of the day it is something your wife is going to have on her finger for the rest of her life. Who cares what it is. Decide on a budget that works for the two of you and get the ring that makes you both happy.

What bane said. Get a policy from jewelers mutual.

Since this board will obvious bias towards male perspective using the "If she isn't willing to accept whatever I give her as an engagement ring then she isn't the right one for me" could easily be flipped on it's head and I don't find it unreasonable for a female to think if a guy isn't willing to buy her exactly what she wants as an engagement ring then he isn't the right one for her. I feel this mythical female where they require a $15,000 ring are greatly exaggerated. If a girl loves you and you love a girl a mutual compromise can easily be struck. Like most have said on here who are actually in real and long relationships they didn't spend a ton on their diamond engagement ring and the girl loves it.

This just in...marketing makes people buy things (ie ANY ring whatsoever - they are at their simplest completely unnecessary) that have personal illogical intangible value. Someone alert the media and get the investigation started, stat.

Tuco, I'm not sure what your response is to my quote. I was saying getting pissy about a diamond when you overpay for food / clothing / transportation (well probably not you) buy video games you play for 5 hours then put down etc etc etc... Is just silly.

It doesn't matter if societal norms or expectations aren't excatly rational / reasonable they exist. You can say you truly " don't care " about what anyone else thinks yet you do / wear / say / behave countless things every day because you conform to them one way or another.

Also Tuco, no one gets ripped off if they feel the item has value ( no matter where that value comes from. Evil coporation or sentament ). Im sure you bought a wedding cake. Probably could have baked your own and saved money. Did she buy a dress, and you a tux? Bro, overspending for something you wear for one day. Did you rent a hall / tables / chairs? Probably over paid for those too. Basically if you do anything for a wedding other than you two signing your license / certificate / justice of the peace you are getting ripped off for weddings.