George Zimmer is BACK IN BUSINESS.

I'm glad he bounced back from that nasty trial after he shot that young black man.

That doesn't sound promising, but I hope it works out.

HI... I'M GEORGE ZIMMER - FOUNDER AND CEO OF zTAILOR. I'VE BEEN BEATEN, SHOT, STABBED, POISONED, DROWNED AND LEFT TO DIE, BUT THEY DON'T CALL ME THE RASPUTIN OF MID-RANGE MEN'S FASHION FOR NOTHING. BABY, IT'S TIME TO GRAB YOUR ANKLES BECAUSE I'M COMING BACK FOR SECONDS. YOU'LL BE SPEAKING RUSSIAN AFTER I SOAK YOUR GLUTEAL STINK CAVE WITH MY DEVASTATING BORSCHT HOSE. I GUARANTEE IT.

Didnt Men's Warehouse get trashed in the Tray-Tray riots?

Soygen_sl said:

I thought George Zimmerman killed someone again. Dammit.

Click to expand...

same

Soygen_sl said:

I thought George Zimmermansavedsomeone again. Dammit.

Click to expand...

FTFY

HI... I'M GEORGE ZIMMER - FOUNDER AND CEO OF zTAILORS. THE SHIT-NIBBLERS AT MEN'S WAREHOUSE HAVE KNOCKED ME FROM MY PERCH, BUT LIKE THE PENIS PHOENIX, I HAVE RISEN AGAIN. THOSE CORPORATE COCKSMUGGLERS ARE STILL STEWING FROM THE TIME I DROPPED A 100 KILOTON BARRAGE OF BABY BATTER ON THEIR MOTHERS. I'VE RELOADED MY BULGING B-52 AND I'M COMING AROUND FOR ANOTHER RUN, EXCEPT THIS TIME I'M GOING SPERMICIDAL. THE BOMBARDMENT WILL BE SO STUNNING THAT THE GHOSTS OF THEIR ANCESTORS ARE GONNA GET PREGNANT. I GUARANTEE IT.

He always reminded me of Morrie from Goodfellas.

I like what Valkyrie's doing here

HI... I'M GEORGE ZIMMER - FOUNDER AND CEO OF zTAILORS. RELEASE YOUR ANAL AIRLOCK BECAUSE THE CROTCH ROCKET IS DOCKING. MY PREHENSILE PENIS WILL RIP THE CLOTHES OFF YOUR BODY WHILE YOU DIAL 911. AS MY PULSATING BABY ARM PROBES THE DEEPEST REACHES OF YOUR DUODENUM GALAXY, YOU'LL ONLY BE ABLE TO WHISPER "WARDROBE MALFUNCTION" INTO THE RECEIVER. I GUARANTEE IT.

I don't always use the coolest man in the world meme

but when I do I read it in a George Zimmer voice

Are his clothes stabbing, concrete and sizzurp proof (in case of spills)?

HI... I'M GEORGE ZIMMER - FOUNDER AND CEO OF zTAILORS. PEOPLE SEEM TO BE CONFUSING ME WITH A CERTAIN WANNABE MALL COP WITH AN ITCHY TRIGGER FINGER. LET ME CLEAR THINGS UP RIGHT NOW: I AM THE O.G. Z. HE IS THE ZIMMER, BUT I AM THE MAN. I SMOKE WakandanS EVERY TIME I FUCK YOUR MOTHER. I GUARANTEE IT.

I forgot Ashley Simpson was alive.

HI... I'M GEORGE ZIMMER - FOUNDER AND CEO OF zTAILORS. YOU MAY REMEMBER ASHLEY SIMPSON AS THE INEPT HE-BITCH CURSED WITH A BRUCE CAMPBELL CHIN AND THE NOSE OF SUPER SAIYAN MOSES. AFTER WANDERING AROUND THE DESERT OF MEDIOCRITY FOR ETERNITY, SHE FINALLY STUMBLED UPON THE OASIS GROWING BENEATH MY MAMMOTH MANHOOD. I PARTED HER RED SEA AND LED THOUSANDS OF MY FLAGELLATE DISCIPLES INTO HER TEMPLE MOUNT. THE FORCE OF MY EMBRYONIC EXPULSION RESHAPED HER VERY VISAGE. SHE'S FUCKING UNRECOGNIZABLE. I GUARANTEE IT.