Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire (2024)

Void

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I'll watch it, but way too much monkey and not enough Bad Motherfuckin' Godzilla. Everyone knows the G-man would fucking annihilate all those apes without breaking a sweat, but cuz movie we gotta watch him wait for Kong to do shit.

Sort of like this:
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fris

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Is it 2 Godzillas or is he sometimes blue and sometimes pink? I'll rewatch the one with all the other monsters and the moth gives some powers to Godzilla. Maybe that upgrade comes and goes.

My boys are 11 and 14, this is right up our alley.
 
Vuuxo

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fris said:
Is it 2 Godzillas or is he sometimes blue and sometimes pink? I'll rewatch the one with all the other monsters and the moth gives some powers to Godzilla. Maybe that upgrade comes and goes.

My boys are 11 and 14, this is right up our alley.
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It's "evolution". Godzilla changes every movie. In the monsterverse he's had 5 evolutions. Tranzilla is the latest evolution. He's taller, slimmer, longer legs and arms and his atomic breath is now "magenta" which on the radiation spectrum I guess is the much more potent/powerful side of the spectrum. Each evolution comes after he gets his ass kicked. This new evolution mimics MechaGodzilla. Larger fins and spiked tail.
 
Kaige

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The movie was decent.

The kaiju stuff was cool and there was plenty of it. Godzilla was awesome in nearly every scene he was in - I can forgive the pink-ness because it A) served a purpose, and B) he was in so many different environments I think pink was just the only color they could use to make him stand out against each one. Kong was cool when he was being a kaiju, but when he was doing gorilla society stuff it was corny. There were so many parallels to typical cliche stories that you'll laugh.

Everything human past the Monarch-only stuff was just dumb and cheesy. The mute girl stuff was so lame and cliche. Of course they also made sure to "insert funny black guy" and that was stereotypical.

Overall probably 7/10 and kaijus made the movie.
 
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TomServo

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Kaige said:
The movie was decent.

The kaiju stuff was cool and there was plenty of it. Godzilla was awesome in nearly every scene he was in - I can forgive the pink-ness because it A) served a purpose, and B) he was in so many different environments I think pink was just the only color they could use to make him stand out against each one. Kong was cool when he was being a kaiju, but when he was doing gorilla society stuff it was corny. There were so many parallels to typical cliche stories that you'll laugh.

Everything human past the Monarch-only stuff was just dumb and cheesy. The mute girl stuff was so lame and cliche. Of course they also made sure to "insert funny black guy" and that was stereotypical.

Overall probably 7/10 and kaijus made the movie.
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American godzilla is gay. Go watch minus one again
 
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Juvarisx

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TomServo said:
American godzilla is gay. Go watch minus one again
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Look im not saying minus one wasn't amazing but watching Kong use baby kong as a baseball bat made the price of admission worth it. These movies finally figured out what they are, seeing a packed theater cheer as Godzilla spears Kong through a pyramid followed up by suplex was fantastic. Highly recommended if you love the cheesy giant monster movies of the past.
 
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LiquidDeath

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Juvarisx said:
Look im not saying minus one wasn't amazing but watching Kong use baby kong as a baseball bat made the price of admission worth it. These movies finally figured out what they are, seeing a packed theater cheer as Godzilla spears Kong through a pyramid followed up by suplex was fantastic. Highly recommended if you love the cheesy giant monster movies of the past.
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The real question is.....how the fuck has it taken this long for them to start realizing why people see these movies?

If I want to see a good movie, I go see something that has a shot at telling a good story.

When I want to see a fun movie, I go see giant monsters wreck each other in the face. Simple as.

I still contend that Michael Bay turned a massive, 50 billion dollar Transformer's franchise into a 10-ish billion franchise and they don't even realize it to this day. All they had to do was a whole lot less of the human bullshit and a whole lot more robots beating the shit out of each other with cuts to Megan Fox wearing as little as PG-13 as possible. They just can't help themselves and they had to fuck it up and make the humans (and DEI robots) fucking annoying while also making them all talk too fucking much.
 
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E

En Sabah Nur

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LiquidDeath said:
The real question is.....how the fuck has it taken this long for them to start realizing why people see these movies?

If I want to see a good movie, I go see something that has a shot at telling a good story.

When I want to see a fun movie, I go see giant monsters wreck each other in the face. Simple as.

I still contend that Michael Bay turned a massive, 50 billion dollar Transformer's franchise into a 10-ish billion franchise and they don't even realize it to this day. All they had to do was a whole lot less of the human bullshit and a whole lot more robots beating the shit out of each other with cuts to Megan Fox wearing as little as PG-13 as possible. They just can't help themselves and they had to fuck it up and make the humans (and DEI robots) fucking annoying while also making them all talk too fucking much.
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This is a bad take for a number of reasons but claiming there were "DEI robots" in Transformers is especially bad. One of the robots calls Shia a fag in one of the movies. The "diversity" was just robots acting out racial stereotypes in a high-tech minstrel show.
 
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LiquidDeath

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En Sabah Nur said:
This is a bad take for a number of reasons but claiming there were "DEI robots" in Transformers is especially bad. One of the robots calls Shia a fag in one of the movies. The "diversity" was just robots acting out racial stereotypes in a high-tech minstrel show.
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youtube name GIF
 
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joz123

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En Sabah Nur said:
This is a bad take for a number of reasons but claiming there were "DEI robots" in Transformers is especially bad. One of the robots calls Shia a fag in one of the movies. The "diversity" was just robots acting out racial stereotypes in a high-tech minstrel show.
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Confused Steve Brule GIF by MOODMAN
 
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OU Ariakas

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I saw this today with one of my sons and I was about to type exactly what Kaige Kaige did. Everything that was not monster related was FUCKING RETARDED..... but at the same time, everything with monsters was fucking awesome. There is a 5-10 minute scene with just CG monster apes that have a conversation with no words and you can understand it PERFECTLY. My son has watched all the other movies, before this one I asked him what he would like most and he said "more monsters." After the movie I asked him to rank it and he said "I think it is the best one because there were way more monsters." Me too son, me too.
 
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Ossoi

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LiquidDeath said:
I still contend that Michael Bay turned a massive, 50 billion dollar Transformer's franchise into a 10-ish billion franchise and they don't even realize it to this day. All they had to do was a whole lot less of the human bullshit and a whole lot more robots beating the shit out of each other with cuts to Megan Fox wearing as little as PG-13 as possible. They just can't help themselves and they had to fuck it up and make the humans (and DEI robots) fucking annoying while also making them all talk too fucking much.
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How did Michael Bay turn a 50bn franchise into a 10bn one when up until his first TF film in 2007 the franchise was effectively dead - Beast Wars being the previous phase

Seems to me like he resurrected it
 
E

En Sabah Nur

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Ossoi said:
How did Michael Bay turn a 50bn franchise into a 10bn one when up until his first TF film in 2007 the franchise was effectively dead - Beast Wars being the previous phase

Seems to me like he resurrected it
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Not to mention the movies made insane amounts of money, especially the original trilogy where the movies were all among the highest grossing box office of their respective year. The idea that Michael Bay somehow fumbled the bag with Transformers is among the worst takes I've ever heard. It's in line with saying George Lucas fumbled the bag on Star Wars.
 
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LiquidDeath

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En Sabah Nur said:
Not to mention the movies made insane amounts of money, especially the original trilogy where the movies were all among the highest grossing box office of their respective year. The idea that Michael Bay somehow fumbled the bag with Transformers is among the worst takes I've ever heard. It's in line with saying George Lucas fumbled the bag on Star Wars.
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Jesus Christ. If anything, I gave Bay too much credit. I said they made 10 billion when they actually only made a bit over 5.

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But regardless, you have to be completely smooth-brained to imagine something making a lot of money automatically means it maxed out its potential.

There were essentially 3 gigantic properties in the 80's: He-Man, G.I. Joe, and Transformers. An entire generation of boys grew up with at least one of those as a major part of their childhood and most with all three. When the 2000's rolled around they had already done He-Man very poorly in the 90's so Transformers and G.I. Joe were up. All they had to do was lean as heavily into the nostalgia as possible and make the movies as direct a copy of the old TV shows as possible. The G.I. Joe movies completely fucked it up, but Transformers had a unique opportunity given the advances in CGI and managed to make a very solid first movie. The problems with that first movie, namely far too much time with the humans; focusing on Bumblebee for God knows what reason; and fucking with the established lore and characters, proved too much to overcome as the subsequent movies amplified those fuck-ups resulting in a series that SHOULD have made more than twice as much being completely ran into the ground so much that nobody gives a shit about the property again. For fuck's sake, the Fast & Furious movies gross more per movie. So did Twilight and the goddamn Hunger Games, all properties that didn't have the type of massive, built-in audience in their prime earning years. A proper Transformers movie series would have been crazy popular from beginning to end, not one good one with a few watchable and the rest massive pieces of trash coasting on the name and reputation of a dead series.
 
spronk

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had some free time so caught this in dolby, enjoyed it a lot. They dumped Millie Bobbie Brown (11 from Stranger Things) which was smart, she really can't act at all and just has one facial expression. Bernie (black guy) and Trapper (Dan Stevens) were great and made the human parts bearable. Monster shit was awesome. If you loved the last movie you'll love this, if you hated that this won't change your mind in any way. The whole movie felt like it was written by an 8 year old boy and thats fine with me.

The only real underbaked part was the villain, pretty shit villain and all these movies have had a problem of not really being able to top Ghidorah who was really a "fuck yo shit up" kaiju done extremely well. These movies also have zero ties to the Apple TV+ Monarch show which is understandable but it woulda been nice to somehow integrate the two.

I think many of the big screens get taken over by Omen this weekend so if you wanna catch it in Dolby or whatever may wanna go this week. It'll be great at home as well but it was really enjoyable seeing it on a massive screen with the crazy sound, I think a 5-15 year old would absolutely love it.
 
Juvarisx

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LiquidDeath said:
Jesus Christ. If anything, I gave Bay too much credit. I said they made 10 billion when they actually only made a bit over 5.

View attachment 522659

But regardless, you have to be completely smooth-brained to imagine something making a lot of money automatically means it maxed out its potential.

There were essentially 3 gigantic properties in the 80's: He-Man, G.I. Joe, and Transformers. An entire generation of boys grew up with at least one of those as a major part of their childhood and most with all three. When the 2000's rolled around they had already done He-Man very poorly in the 90's so Transformers and G.I. Joe were up. All they had to do was lean as heavily into the nostalgia as possible and make the movies as direct a copy of the old TV shows as possible. The G.I. Joe movies completely fucked it up, but Transformers had a unique opportunity given the advances in CGI and managed to make a very solid first movie. The problems with that first movie, namely far too much time with the humans; focusing on Bumblebee for God knows what reason; and fucking with the established lore and characters, proved too much to overcome as the subsequent movies amplified those fuck-ups resulting in a series that SHOULD have made more than twice as much being completely ran into the ground so much that nobody gives a shit about the property again. For fuck's sake, the Fast & Furious movies gross more per movie. So did Twilight and the goddamn Hunger Games, all properties that didn't have the type of massive, built-in audience in their prime earning years. A proper Transformers movie series would have been crazy popular from beginning to end, not one good one with a few watchable and the rest massive pieces of trash coasting on the name and reputation of a dead series.
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Michael Bay only had involvement really in the first 4 , his producer credit is so the studio can use his name and he gets some bucks. He averaged ~$820 mill per film for the ones he directed which was 4-5x films budget so everyone was happy.
 
LiquidDeath

LiquidDeath

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Juvarisx said:
Michael Bay only had involvement really in the first 4 , his producer credit is so the studio can use his name and he gets some bucks. He averaged ~$820 mill per film for the ones he directed which was 4-5x films budget so everyone was happy.
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I don't know if they were as happy as you make them out to be. Seems like "Other Territories" is doing a lot of heavy lifting for all but 1 and 2, especially since we know they have a lot of trouble extracting money out of China. It isn't like they even get a half cut from most other foreign countries either.

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In any case, the argument from the start was that they easily could have been better and grossed more in the sweet, sweet domestic market that is the real bellwether for commercial success. The CGI was enough to lift 1 and 2 from bad to above average films, and Peter Cullen brought enough nostalgia bait that they did better then they deserved to do given the quality of their writing and their lack of faithful plot. CGI was the only thing worthwhile about 3 and 4 and their domestic box office reflects as much. The rest are straight garbage that even the promise of giant CGI fighting robots couldn't save.
 
Ossoi

Ossoi

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LiquidDeath said:
There were essentially 3 gigantic properties in the 80's: He-Man, G.I. Joe, and Transformers.
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There is so much wrong with your whole argument.

Firstly, and this is coming from someone who watches the 86 cartoon movie 3-4x a year - just because something is popular with pre teen boys doesn't mean it can become an Uber franchise.

In fact, has any toy line achieved greater success than the bay formers? TMNT, power rangers etc also flunked

Whilst I was turned off by the first movie due to the way they changed the characters, saying all they had to do was copy the old cartoons - have you even watched them recently? Whilst there are some decent episodes they're also fairly cheesy and season 3 was a massive downgrade in both animation and story quality. Human characters got plenty of screen time etc
 
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