I just finished up about a dozen interviews for two openings on my team at a mid-sized, fast-growing public tech company. Every resume that made it through HR and got to my desk looked completely plain and boring. Even if they had been applying for a graphics design position in our marketing department, I can't see anyone getting in that didn't have a professional resume and then all their work in a portfolio on the side. Maybe it would be different if it was a small design firm, but everywhere else its qualifications and recommendations that get you a position, not making your resume a pain in the butt to read.