Jungle Cruise (2020)
- Thread starter spronk
- Start date
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Guest, it's time once again for the massively important and exciting FoH Asshat Tournament!
Go here and give us your nominations!Who's been the biggest Asshat in the last year? Give us your worst ones!
spronk
FPS noob
- 23,481
- 27,453
Had a big family movie night and invited a few kids, I have a big theater room and everyone enjoyed it. Maybe a bit too long clocking in at 2 hours but only 1-2 scenes dragged. Rock and Emily Blunt were good, they don't have that much chemistry but they make a good swashbuckling pair.
Its pretty much Pirates of the Caribbean with a splash of Mummy tossed in. While those movies are 70% action dude and 30% smart capable female, this movie is more 70% smart capable female and 30% action dude. The story kind of zooms all over the place, could have used maybe one or two less things and more deeper exploration of some backstory. Jessie Plemmons (Todd from Breaking Bad) is the bad guy, a 1916 german villain of course, and does a good job. Emily Blunt's character is pretty much a carbon copy of Evie from The Mummy, and she even has her dumb brother sidekick (who is now gay! but its only mentioned once)
CGI is sorta all over the place, some great stuff and some really awful stuff. The budget is $200m+ so thats NUTS. Its gonna bomb pretty bad in theaters I'm fairly certain, and I doubt it'll do the sort of D+ $30 numbers that Black Widow did.
Its NOT as good as pirates of the carribean, but if that movie is a 7.5/10 this is a pretty solid 6/10. That movie had a fantastic cast and a gem of a villain and a tight plot, this muddles along with a B-tier cast, a mostly messy story, but a nice and fun setting. It is formulaic as hell but nothing wrong with that, imo.
Its pretty much Pirates of the Caribbean with a splash of Mummy tossed in. While those movies are 70% action dude and 30% smart capable female, this movie is more 70% smart capable female and 30% action dude. The story kind of zooms all over the place, could have used maybe one or two less things and more deeper exploration of some backstory. Jessie Plemmons (Todd from Breaking Bad) is the bad guy, a 1916 german villain of course, and does a good job. Emily Blunt's character is pretty much a carbon copy of Evie from The Mummy, and she even has her dumb brother sidekick (who is now gay! but its only mentioned once)
CGI is sorta all over the place, some great stuff and some really awful stuff. The budget is $200m+ so thats NUTS. Its gonna bomb pretty bad in theaters I'm fairly certain, and I doubt it'll do the sort of D+ $30 numbers that Black Widow did.
Its NOT as good as pirates of the carribean, but if that movie is a 7.5/10 this is a pretty solid 6/10. That movie had a fantastic cast and a gem of a villain and a tight plot, this muddles along with a B-tier cast, a mostly messy story, but a nice and fun setting. It is formulaic as hell but nothing wrong with that, imo.
- 1
Gravel
Mr. Poopybutthole
- 40,206
- 133,006
Haven't watched it yet, but that's essentially what the ride is. It's literally just bad puns and dad jokes.
It's not really even a ride. That's why it depends so heavily on the Disney employee who's driving the boat. If they suck, the ride sucks. If they're good, the ride is hilarious.
- 1
Animosity
Silver Baronet of the Realm
- 7,194
- 6,103
I love the ride. Was one of my favorites as a kid. They definitely use every corny joke from the ride in the movie. But the movie was just awful. It was all over the place. The CGI wasn’t good. They Rock and Blunt’s romance was so forced and out of no where. I don’t know how someone green lit this storyline. The comparison to Pirates is pretty spot on.
Harshaw
Throbbing Member
- 26,742
- 141,857
The Rock really doesn't have that many great movies. Hell, I think The Rundown is my favorite Rock movie and that was like his first. This movie was just ok I guess. Mainly for action and cgi stuff though. This was definitely a phone in role for everyone involved. This is definitely not gonna spawn a PotC type franchise for sure.
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ShakyJake
<Donor>
- 7,956
- 20,056
I always though The Rock would pick up the action hero torch from Schwarzenegger, but never really delivered.
- 2
Malakriss
Golden Baronet of the Realm
- 12,725
- 12,021
All those writers from the 80s/90s retired or died and there was no one to replace them.
Fadaar
That guy
- 11,043
- 12,062
plus you arent allowed to make macho grab em by the pussy action movies anymore like the Arnold movies of old
- 3
zzeris
King Turd of Shit Hill
- 20,571
- 88,004
The money argument is always terrible though. Arnold went from a guy who could barely speak English to an action star that people went to a movie specifically because he was in it. I don't think you can say that about Johnson and that's one reason he sticks to ensemble and family movies. The guy knows he can't carry a movie just as much as everyone else does.
- 2
Chukzombi
Millie's Staff Member
- 73,122
- 214,410
i'm not a Rock fan. i think he's ok, but he can carry a minor movie. i thought he was fine in Doom and Walking Tall.
- 2,639
- 5,001
This bothers me more than I can understand. I know they like money as much as anyone but .....wtf! And it had zero bearing on the movie at all. It started and I was like 'what the fuck!' after 2 cords....
Also , movie was meh.
- 1
Goatface
Avatar of War Slayer
- 10,073
- 16,487
was looking at his films, his biggest solo leads (ones i consider his movie, some not sure about like witch mountain, and other i have not seen)
San Andreas
Rampage
Skyscraper
Hercules
The Game Plan
always thought skyscraper was a bomb, but appears china/foreign saved it. Is Faster his most gritty action movie? been a decade but remember it was ok.
San Andreas
Rampage
Skyscraper
Hercules
The Game Plan
always thought skyscraper was a bomb, but appears china/foreign saved it. Is Faster his most gritty action movie? been a decade but remember it was ok.
- 1
Sterling
El Presidente
- 13,100
- 8,080
