Marriage and the Power of Divorce

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Alex

Alex

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Think I always hated mowing more than raking leaves. All lawn maintenance sucks though.
 
Deathwing

Deathwing

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Lawn maintenance does indeed suck. Good way to partially rationalize it is that it's good aerobic exercise. So time wasted mowing your lawn is at least partially less time spent at the gym.
 
Noodleface

Noodleface

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Wife always gives me shit "I bet you're going to count that as exercise for the day"

You're goddamn fucking right I am
 
Hoss

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Noodleface said:
Wife always gives me shit "I bet you're going to count that as exercise for the day"

You're goddamn fucking right I am
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Damn straight. Don't give in on that or next thing you know she wont let you count the 4 hours of begging as foreplay.

Speaking of that, I heard about a study that made me think of you noodle bro. They determined that men who do housework have better sex lives. Don't you do all your housework and still have a shitty sex life? You're getting fucked and not in the good way.
 
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Noodleface

Noodleface

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Hoss said:
Damn straight. Don't give in on that or next thing you know she wont let you count the 4 hours of begging as foreplay.

Speaking of that, I heard about a study that made me think of you noodle bro. They determined that men who do housework have better sex lives. Don't you do all your housework and still have a shitty sex life? You're getting fucked and not in the good way.
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Well its weird.

Before this kid we used to have sex all the time, basically every day and sometimes twice. Obvious medical issues came with the kid plus the traumatic birth and I think her vagina went out for lunch
 
moonarchia

moonarchia

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Noodleface said:
Well its weird.

Before this kid we used to have sex all the time, basically every day and sometimes twice. Obvious medical issues came with the kid plus the traumatic birth and I think her vagina went out for lunch
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So eat it back into service?
 
Prodigal

Prodigal

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Namon said:
Wife has to deliver a wedding cake to the Chattanooga area, and we are taking full advantage of that and taking a autumn drive through the Smokies to Highlands NC, and up to Asheville, and back to home via I 40. Gonna be a fun mini getaway and hopefully we can bury the hatchet over some of this tension that has built up over the last month or two. Either way the fall foliage should be awesome.
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Highlands is amazing, wife and I have been there a few times for short getaways. Stayed at Old Edwards Inn, expensive but nicer IMO than the Grove Park Inn in Asheville.
 
Namon

Namon

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Prodigal said:
Highlands is amazing, wife and I have been there a few times for short getaways. Stayed at Old Edwards Inn, expensive but nicer IMO than the Grove Park Inn in Asheville.
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Unfortunately cake delivery isn't until the afternoon so we had to adjust. Definitely going to look into doing that another time though. It's a 4 hour drive from where we are delivering, so we will just go to the Chattanooga area instead.
 
Big Phoenix

Big Phoenix

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pharmakos said:
how did it happen?
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Aside from the issue I posted about a few weeks ago, communication and trust issues from lack of it. Shes currently at school while in the Navy reserves, so communication was a very big thing. Prior to her joining this was an issue. When she did decide to join, there was zero discussion about it. It was a unilateral choice of hers and she never asked me how I felt. Even worse is before she left she never once tried to sit down and talk, let alone even say goodbye. It was like to her she was going to work at a 9-5 job.

Basically all came to a head last weekend. After she gets out of class on Friday she tries calling me, I cant answer so I call her back. She asks how come I didnt answer since i had just texted her and I tell her I was on a phone interview for a job, she doesnt ask a single question or say anything about it. She says that shes getting ready to go out to eat with her friends, so she will call/text me when she is done eating. Three hours go by and nothing from her so I text her. She ends up calling me saying she just got back onto base and that shes going to take a nap(at 9pm?) and she will call me when she gets up. She never calls but sends a text almost an hour later saying shes down stairs hanging out with her friends.

By now, the constant blowing me off and not taking an interest in me(this has been consistent for the past 2 months) finally got to me. I send her a text saying Im done chasing after her texts/calls, if she takes 2-3 hours to respond to me thats how long Im going to respond to her. Saturday this leads to a long conversation, me telling her that being in mos school is literally the easiest it will ever be military wise on a relationship, that a deployment is going to be infinitely worse on our relationship. Ends with her saying she promises to make things better and put an effort into the relationship more or less. Well by now its Saturday night so she texts me saying shes going to study for a little bit then she will call me. She doesnt call or text me the rest of the night.

Come Sunday I let that slide, I dont bring it up thinking shes serious about what she said. Up until Sunday evening were texting off and on until she says shes watching a movie that is almost over and she will be going up to her room and she will call me. Well 30-45 minutes go by and I get a text from her saying shes watching another movie and that she will call me when shes done. I dont respond to her so she texts me again an hour later saying shes still watching movies, she will call me when shes done. By now Im pretty pissed off, end up texting back and forth. I told her at this point it just seems like shes purposely fucking with me on purpose, I feel like a toy that she takes out when she has nothing better to do.

After this she just seems to withdraw, barely texting me and when she does is 4-5 word texts of no substance, called once or twice but was very brief and also didnt say anything really. I was supposed to fly out there today and spend the weekend with her so I texted her last night if she still wants me to come and try and fix this to call me when she got up today. She didnt call so I didnt go which to me means to were done.
 
Namon

Namon

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Oh yeah now I remember, sorry. Yeah, this was a good call at this point. Move on. Long distance relationships suck ass anyway, I can't imagine one where military service is involved could even remotely be any better.
 
Mrs. Gravy

Mrs. Gravy

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Holy fuck Big Phoenix Big Phoenix , the lack of consideration, the dearth of any respect exhibited by the person who was supposed to love you...I don't even really know you and that hurts my heart for you.

I am scrappy and can be mean, you want me to hurt her?
I get all grizzly Momma Bear even with my inner webs boys...like tear out a throat and disembowel someone fucking with my cubs...at least metaphorically ;)
 
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moonarchia

moonarchia

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Big P you've been single since she left for school, this is just where you realized it. Take whatever time you need to process it and mourn, and move on.
 
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Big Phoenix

Big Phoenix

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Mrs. Gravy said:
Holy fuck Big Phoenix Big Phoenix , the lack of consideration, the dearth of any respect exhibited by the person who was supposed to love you...I don't even really know you and that hurts my heart for you.
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Should have heard her response when I calmly and thoughtfully explained that to her, basically;

"I get so bored and stressed here so if I go out for a few hours to let loose and relax and dont text/call you its not a big deal"

moonarchia said:
Big P you've been single since she left for school, this is just where you realized it. Take whatever time you need to process it and mourn, and move on.
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Yeah. I think this is the result of her being alone on her own for the first time in her life and completely away from her very controlling mother. I just thought at 25 she would be too mature for such behavior.
 
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pharmakos

pharmakos

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Big Phoenix said:
Aside from the issue I posted about a few weeks ago, communication and trust issues from lack of it. Shes currently at school while in the Navy reserves, so communication was a very big thing. Prior to her joining this was an issue. When she did decide to join, there was zero discussion about it. It was a unilateral choice of hers and she never asked me how I felt. Even worse is before she left she never once tried to sit down and talk, let alone even say goodbye. It was like to her she was going to work at a 9-5 job.

Basically all came to a head last weekend. After she gets out of class on Friday she tries calling me, I cant answer so I call her back. She asks how come I didnt answer since i had just texted her and I tell her I was on a phone interview for a job, she doesnt ask a single question or say anything about it. She says that shes getting ready to go out to eat with her friends, so she will call/text me when she is done eating. Three hours go by and nothing from her so I text her. She ends up calling me saying she just got back onto base and that shes going to take a nap(at 9pm?) and she will call me when she gets up. She never calls but sends a text almost an hour later saying shes down stairs hanging out with her friends.

By now, the constant blowing me off and not taking an interest in me(this has been consistent for the past 2 months) finally got to me. I send her a text saying Im done chasing after her texts/calls, if she takes 2-3 hours to respond to me thats how long Im going to respond to her. Saturday this leads to a long conversation, me telling her that being in mos school is literally the easiest it will ever be military wise on a relationship, that a deployment is going to be infinitely worse on our relationship. Ends with her saying she promises to make things better and put an effort into the relationship more or less. Well by now its Saturday night so she texts me saying shes going to study for a little bit then she will call me. She doesnt call or text me the rest of the night.

Come Sunday I let that slide, I dont bring it up thinking shes serious about what she said. Up until Sunday evening were texting off and on until she says shes watching a movie that is almost over and she will be going up to her room and she will call me. Well 30-45 minutes go by and I get a text from her saying shes watching another movie and that she will call me when shes done. I dont respond to her so she texts me again an hour later saying shes still watching movies, she will call me when shes done. By now Im pretty pissed off, end up texting back and forth. I told her at this point it just seems like shes purposely fucking with me on purpose, I feel like a toy that she takes out when she has nothing better to do.

After this she just seems to withdraw, barely texting me and when she does is 4-5 word texts of no substance, called once or twice but was very brief and also didnt say anything really. I was supposed to fly out there today and spend the weekend with her so I texted her last night if she still wants me to come and try and fix this to call me when she got up today. She didnt call so I didnt go which to me means to were done.
Click to expand...

sounds like its for the best, man. sucks right now but eventually you'll be happy its over.
 
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Cad

Cad

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Big Phoenix said:
Aside from the issue I posted about a few weeks ago, communication and trust issues from lack of it. Shes currently at school while in the Navy reserves, so communication was a very big thing. Prior to her joining this was an issue. When she did decide to join, there was zero discussion about it. It was a unilateral choice of hers and she never asked me how I felt. Even worse is before she left she never once tried to sit down and talk, let alone even say goodbye. It was like to her she was going to work at a 9-5 job.

Basically all came to a head last weekend. After she gets out of class on Friday she tries calling me, I cant answer so I call her back. She asks how come I didnt answer since i had just texted her and I tell her I was on a phone interview for a job, she doesnt ask a single question or say anything about it. She says that shes getting ready to go out to eat with her friends, so she will call/text me when she is done eating. Three hours go by and nothing from her so I text her. She ends up calling me saying she just got back onto base and that shes going to take a nap(at 9pm?) and she will call me when she gets up. She never calls but sends a text almost an hour later saying shes down stairs hanging out with her friends.

By now, the constant blowing me off and not taking an interest in me(this has been consistent for the past 2 months) finally got to me. I send her a text saying Im done chasing after her texts/calls, if she takes 2-3 hours to respond to me thats how long Im going to respond to her. Saturday this leads to a long conversation, me telling her that being in mos school is literally the easiest it will ever be military wise on a relationship, that a deployment is going to be infinitely worse on our relationship. Ends with her saying she promises to make things better and put an effort into the relationship more or less. Well by now its Saturday night so she texts me saying shes going to study for a little bit then she will call me. She doesnt call or text me the rest of the night.

Come Sunday I let that slide, I dont bring it up thinking shes serious about what she said. Up until Sunday evening were texting off and on until she says shes watching a movie that is almost over and she will be going up to her room and she will call me. Well 30-45 minutes go by and I get a text from her saying shes watching another movie and that she will call me when shes done. I dont respond to her so she texts me again an hour later saying shes still watching movies, she will call me when shes done. By now Im pretty pissed off, end up texting back and forth. I told her at this point it just seems like shes purposely fucking with me on purpose, I feel like a toy that she takes out when she has nothing better to do.

After this she just seems to withdraw, barely texting me and when she does is 4-5 word texts of no substance, called once or twice but was very brief and also didnt say anything really. I was supposed to fly out there today and spend the weekend with her so I texted her last night if she still wants me to come and try and fix this to call me when she got up today. She didnt call so I didnt go which to me means to were done.
Click to expand...

Sorry to hear that man, sounds like she has been checked out for some time and was keeping you as a backup plan.

I know it's impossible but you need to forget about her immediately and jump back on the horse and do better for yourself next time.
 
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