Parent Thread

My son (7, with autism) went to the sweetheart dance with my wife and said "no one is going to dance with me, I don't have a single friend."

That one was like a bullet through my heart.

Noodleface said:

My son (7, with autism) went to the sweetheart dance with my wife and said "no one is going to dance with me, I don't have a single friend."

That one was like a bullet through my heart.

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Damn dude

Thanks for the response. We have a daily dialogue with the teacher because of his issues. He did have a best friend, but she moved on and he's never really recovered. Can't blame her but she was his only friend and the world to him really. It's a lot to put on a 6 year old

Edit: trying everything we can too, don't want to seem like we're sitting idly by.

He goes to every birthday party for his class. I've definitely seen kids avoiding him. He's very quirky and probably a bit more immature for his age.

We do a weekly social skills group where he plays with other neurodivergent kids. This is the highlight of his week, but still he mostly sticks to solo play.

He's in gnome surf in the summers. Basically weekly surf lessons for kids with mental disabilities. Helps with all of his motor skills and confidence.

He's in ABA which I'll be honest I'm not a fan of, but over the years we've had at least one person that was great with him.


Sorry, guess I ranted a bit there. It's definitely tough being the parent of a kid with Autism
He has bi-monthly therapy as well.

BoozeCube said:

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Noodleface said:

Thanks for the response. We have a daily dialogue with the teacher because of his issues. He did have a best friend, but she moved on and he's never really recovered. Can't blame her but she was his only friend and the world to him really. It's a lot to put on a 6 year old

Edit: trying everything we can too, don't want to seem like we're sitting idly by.

He goes to every birthday party for his class. I've definitely seen kids avoiding him. He's very quirky and probably a bit more immature for his age.

We do a weekly social skills group where he plays with other neurodivergent kids. This is the highlight of his week, but still he mostly sticks to solo play.

He's in gnome surf in the summers. Basically weekly surf lessons for kids with mental disabilities. Helps with all of his motor skills and confidence.

He's in ABA which I'll be honest I'm not a fan of, but over the years we've had at least one person that was great with him.


Sorry, guess I ranted a bit there. It's definitely tough being the parent of a kid with Autism
He has bi-monthly therapy as well.

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Is he antisocial, asocial, or just socially awkward? That will help determine the difficulty level he is playing on. As someone on the spectrum who had to figure that shit out in order to become moderate to high functioning, I would suggest just getting him into group settings based around whatever hobbies he enjoys.

moonarchia said:

Is he antisocial, asocial, or just socially awkward? That will help determine the difficulty level he is playing on. As someone on the spectrum who had to figure that shit out in order to become moderate to high functioning, I would suggest just getting him into group settings based around whatever hobbies he enjoys.

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Mostly socially awkward. He wants to play with other kids but a lot ignore him. Sometimes he just is in his own world and prefers to play by himself. It's not really antisocial, just moreso he is doing some crazy ass shit that only he knows about.

We do have him in some groups, and the good news is my oldest son's friends always include him which I love. At one of their birthdays my friends son said "hey want to come ride bikes with us?" My son got so excited he choked on his food and puked lol.

Captain Suave said:

Anyone have current suggestions for phones/plans for kids that would enable voice, texting, and GPS tracking without full app/internet capabilities? My son is 13 and rides his bike to and from school. I'd like him to be able to call if there's a schedule change or he gets a flat, but I'd like to avoid handing him TikTok.

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My son turned 12 month and we got him the Gabb Phone as an upgrade from the Gizmo watch. It has calling, texting, music, and some select apps that parents can approve. It doesn't have internet browsers or any social media.

Noodleface said:

It's definitely tough being the parent of a kid with Autism

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I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.

Sounds like his mental faculties are intact? With age will come some degree of being able to put on a normal facade which will cause its own issues but at least takes the edge off of the soul-crushing loneliness.

Noodleface said:

My son (7, with autism) went to the sweetheart dance with my wife and said "no one is going to dance with me, I don't have a single friend."

That one was like a bullet through my heart.

Click to expand...

I feel you - my 5 year old daughter is autistic as well. She more or less is in her own world and plays similarly to how you describe your son.

I don't really have anything to add other than I get what you are feeling. Things like that can be heartbreaking.

Boys rule. I got 2 gals. Sad.

Noodleface said:

Mostly socially awkward. He wants to play with other kids but a lot ignore him. Sometimes he just is in his own world and prefers to play by himself. It's not really antisocial, just moreso he is doing some crazy ass shit that only he knows about.

We do have him in some groups, and the good news is my oldest son's friends always include him which I love. At one of their birthdays my friends son said "hey want to come ride bikes with us?" My son got so excited he choked on his food and puked lol.

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Kinda sounds like one of my cousins. If it’s any consolation I think he had trouble through high school but ended up joining the military and really found his niche there. Got out and has a decent job, engaged and recently had a child

One of my daughters came home for a visit today. She brought me this book. I don't know how I feel about it.

lurkingdirk said:

One of my daughters came home for a visit today. She brought me this book. I don't know how I feel about it.

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I would say she has a good sense of humor!

Oblio said:

Could be worse, she could have brought home a board member of FoH.

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My children are smarter than that.

Oblio said:

Could be worse, she could have brought home a board member of FoH.

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They have FoH at home.

I just heard something that has me thinking. We had people over for lunch today, father, son, mother. The son is 17 and is a really tough kid. He has excellent parents. This kid just fell in with the wrong crowd. Got involved in drugs, has been a douchebag for the last year. Totally disrespects his parents, not okay at all. Seems impervious to punishment like no cell phone, no computer, no games, no going out...essentially this kid is on house arrest. He still is an absolute ass to his parents. While at our house he was being such a disrespectful shit to his mother it took a lot of will power for me not to say anything. I know these folks never spanked their son, have been seriously involved in his life, brought him to practices, took him to lessons, did everything right as far as anyone could tell. I know anything's possible, but I've known this couple for 25 years and they are amazing. They were also incredibly good and gracious with my own children, watching them often when my wife and I took a weekend away.

So this kid was resentfully sitting at lunch, being a total lump (his parents don't like leaving him at home because he gets friends over who bring him pot or whatever the flavour of the day is), and he keeps making shitty comments to and about his parents. At one point he says, "Mom, don't be so fucking stupid. You're always the stupidest person in the room."

I could see that his father had hit a limit. It was just plainly evident. He looked at his son, very calm but clearly furious, and said to him, "You're too big for me to start spanking. However, if you ever speak to my wife like that again I will deal with you the same way I would deal with any other man who said that. Is anything I just said unclear?"

The son absolutely blanched. He had clearly hit a new low. His parents are clearly done being supportive in that way. He replied, "No sir." He didn't say another word for the remaining 2 hours they were there. He looked like someone punched him in the face. I'm not for anyone physically abusing their kids, despite what the local Russian fuckstick says, but at 17, being that disrespectful needs to carry a penalty. There was not an expressed threat of physical retaliation, but it was very clear that he would no longer be welcome in the house.

So, FOH parents, thoughts on this?