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Caliane

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I watched "Solomon Kane" because it popped up on my "might like" list on Tubi.

It was described as a "dark fantasy." It's like a cheap Game of Thrones without the sex, characters, or budget. It has a good concept-- protagonist is the biggest, toughest, badass in the world, but he's gone all goodie-two-shoes and given himself to Christ. Until his newly-found family is compromised. Then he sells his soul and goes into revenge mode.

Pretty typical from there, except it is clearly part of a story-arc that is never picked-up or completed.

Honestly, I would have watched the sequel (that was never, and probably will never, be made).

It's like Taco Bell- you're not getting first class anything, but it's cheap and you get what you expect.
6/10
well, I feel like this post requires a history fyi.

Solomon Kane was a pulp magazine character, by Robert E. Howard. created in 1928. A Puritan man, travelling the world fighting evil. the origin character for Witchfinders, for Warhammer, Vampire hunter d, etc... Weird west, Secret world, etc.
"Howard described him as a tall, sombre and gloomy man of pale skin, gaunt face and cold eyes, all of it shadowed by a slouch hat. He is dressed entirely in black and his weaponry usually consists of a rapier, a dirk, and a brace of flintlock pistols. "
He shares a universe with Conan, also by Robert E. Howard, and Lovecraft, as the two were friends, and added elements of each others stories and characters to their own stories.

The tomb of Tutankhamun was opened in 1922. and the Curse of the Mummy sparked interest in mysticism like crazy.
Howard and Lovecraft capitalized on this.

Huge amounts of Dnd, Tolkien, etc can be traced back to Howard and Lovecraft. for example, Liches came from Egyptian Necromancers, and Mummys. if you ever wondered why DnD mummys are powerful spellcasters, while the Universal mummy is just a guy in bandages moaning. Thoth-amon from Conan. its because of Egyptian lore. Death priests, necromancy, mummies, Anubis and Set.
red nails is the origin of the Yaun-ti.



the movie itself yeah. ok at best. over-reliance on cgi action is probably its biggest flaw. It feels like that Van helsing movie, hansel and Gretel, etc.
 
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Locnar

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Demon (2016) 10/10

Fantastic movie. Dumb name, but a serious movie. Mostly in Polish.
 
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TBT-TheBigToe

Gemcutter
<Gold Donor>
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M-0026_Metalstorm_The_Destruction_of_Jared-Syn_quad_movie_poster_l.jpg

Metalstorm: The Destruction of Jared-Syn (1983) - IMDb - IMDB Score 3.9/10
Delightful, terrible, fun, and with an awful ending.
Shitty vehicles, lame effects, bad costumes, worse props, stupid plot, terrible name, risky stunts, and I loved it
TBT Score 6/10​
 
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lgarthy

<Silver Donator>
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Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story

Completely forgot about this movie, laughed all the way through it.

Jesus what an amazing film. John Reilly is so goddamn AMAZING in this movie. He is what they make awards for (but I don't think he got any). GREAT FILM (remiscent, for me anyway, of a Coen brother's film).

Soooooo good!
 
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Izo

Tranny Chaser
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giphy.gif

Rewatched The Ninth Gate on netflix. Fun times with Depp, the devil and Polanskis wife naked. Ending after the final whore of babylon shag sucks, but I’ll give it a 5/7 for some okay ass and tits.
 
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Caliane

Avatar of War Slayer
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fast color. -amazon prime. 6/10 maybe.

meh. mostly family drama.
Girl with super powers, and earthquake seizures is fleeing government doctors. Goes back home. Shes a drug addict, and left her daughter with her mom. trys to reconnect with daughter and mom. Mom and daughter both have the molecule man powers, do nothing with said powers, and dont have the seizure problem.

its funny, so many liberal pussyass hollywood writers, and comic writers, and video game writers, all do this same shit. super powers, do nothing useful for society OR capitalist with said powers. just hide with them... mean ole evil government wants to test person!.
time and time again, they write this dumb shit. then reality comes around... "omg wear a mask, get covid tested, get gun registered, and controlled, suck that government cock, government heathcare!" They would be at the front of the line demanding the government intervene. providing health care, support, and registration.
 

Locnar

<Bronze Donator>
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Tonight She Comes (2016) has a 80's vibe but there are things in this movie that I have NEVER seen before in horror. I thought it was a hell of a lot of fun and great atmosphere. 8/10. Lots of full nudity for your sexless nerds ,as a bonus.
 
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a_skeleton_05

<Banned>
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The Report 6.5/10

Adam driver movie on Amazon Prime about the senate report on the CIA torture program after 9/11. Driver gives a great performance and the rest of the casting is great, but the pacing of the movie really drags it down.
 

Void

BAU BAU
<Gold Donor>
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Coma aka Koma - 2019 russian sci fi movie, a mix of Inception, Matrix, and a little bit of Half Life. really interesting and cool, totally worth a watch if you are a fan of Inception. Fascinating to see the Russian perspective on big concept ideas. The movie is obviously in Russian but the download I got had english dubs that was pretty good.
Watched this last night. I'd give it maybe a 6.5/10. I enjoyed it, but I'm not raving about it. As you said, if you're a fan of this type of thing, it is worth the watch. Russia needs to up their nudity game though.

I tried to watch Attraction, that other Russian movie mentioned lately since the semi-sequel just came out, and it only had subtitles. Which I'm normally fine with. But they were AWFUL. Like, I couldn't even stand to watch it because of how bad the subtitle translations were. I'll have to go search out some better ones, or a dub perhaps, before I try again.

As I mentioned elsewhere, the main attraction for Russian movies lately is that they don't give a fuck about diversity. Maybe I'm a bad person, but I just want a decent story with decent actors, who don't have to let us know how stunning and brave they are for being a woman, or of color, or LGBTQ++BBQ. I don't care if they are, but if it isn't what the story is about, don't tell me and make a big deal of it. I don't think alien invaders give a fuck if someone is stunning and brave on the internet.
 
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Caliane

Avatar of War Slayer
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The circle. amazon prime. 7/10 maybe?

its a bit interesting to visit this now in 2020. can check the thread on this back in 2017. not much talked about there. mostly "looks like a black mirror episode" and, they weren't wrong.
Also Karen Gillan acts circles around Hermione. (this was the same year as GotG 2.)
I think it starts well enough. But, never really addresses the philosophy, or the problems it presents. The ending then is a real let down. the take away is, the surveillance state isn't bad, its just the 2 guys at the head of it, were corrupt. very strange. It never comes back to dealing with Mae's insane, "lets force everyone to us our app to vote" plan either.
no resolution with Boyega either. Why was he even helping Hermione at the end, after it was clear she drank all the coolaid?
 

Locnar

<Bronze Donator>
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Watched "Lovely Molly" on tubi last night, it was GOOD 9/10

Gave me Heredity, House of the Devil, and Entity (from the 80s) vibes. Sound/music was a highlight. Must see for horror fans.
 
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spronk

FPS noob
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27,210
The circle. amazon prime. 7/10 maybe?

its a bit interesting to visit this now in 2020. can check the thread on this back in 2017. not much talked about there. mostly "looks like a black mirror episode" and, they weren't wrong.
Also Karen Gillan acts circles around Hermione. (this was the same year as GotG 2.)
I think it starts well enough. But, never really addresses the philosophy, or the problems it presents. The ending then is a real let down. the take away is, the surveillance state isn't bad, its just the 2 guys at the head of it, were corrupt. very strange. It never comes back to dealing with Mae's insane, "lets force everyone to us our app to vote" plan either.
no resolution with Boyega either. Why was he even helping Hermione at the end, after it was clear she drank all the coolaid?

i haven't watched it yet but I've heard the TV show Devs has some similar stuff to The Circle but done in a better way. It has Ron from Parks & Rec too
 

a_skeleton_05

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Shot Caller - 8.5

One of the better 'good man enters prison and becomes a monster' movies I've seen. Pretty good cast too. Bernthal. Jaime Lannister. Tench from mindhunter.


On Netflix

 
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Intrinsic

Person of Whiteness
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Started the night by trying to watch Radioactive about Currie, but it was devoid of actual science-y stuff so turned it off after an hour.

Then somehow went even worse and took Caliane Caliane ’s advice and watched The Circle. God, this was even more terribelur. Just terrible.
 

a_skeleton_05

<Banned>
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Alpha - 7/10

Some pretty great visuals, and it does a decent job at presenting a (mostly) believable portrayal of early man. Would rate higher but it has a bit too many Hollywood story elements.

I would definitely recommend it as a father & son movie, or for dog lovers.



Ignore the shitty English dub in the trailer. Best watched with subtitles.
 

Caliane

Avatar of War Slayer
15,321
11,616
Started the night by trying to watch Radioactive about Currie, but it was devoid of actual science-y stuff so turned it off after an hour.

Then somehow went even worse and took Caliane Caliane ’s advice and watched The Circle. God, this was even more terribelur. Just terrible.
Im not sure my advice was to actually watch it. lol. that wasnt exactly a glowing review.
 
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Intrinsic

Person of Whiteness
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Cosmos. 8/10. 168minutes of 3 guys in a car.. A directorial debut, self made movie from what I understand. some obvious influences/ripoffs... a bit overdone at times, but largely super impressive for again, a movie that is 90% 3 guys in a car at night talking.
Comparable to The Vast of Night, and the opening of Contact.

I really really liked this. It was just, I don’t know, charming? There were parts that pulled it down a tad bit really it was all just enjoyable. To pull that off with three actors and basically a single set seems crazy. And when they say 3 guys in a car, sure, but it is a car parked at a spot in the woods. So there is movement and outside action. It isn’t claustrophobic. And it doesn’t try to overly deal with the science and alien thing and get too try hard.

Dunno man, good recommendation. Would suggest.
 

Intrinsic

Person of Whiteness
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Tonight She Comes (2016) has a 80's vibe but there are things in this movie that I have NEVER seen before in horror. I thought it was a hell of a lot of fun and great atmosphere. 8/10. Lots of full nudity for your sexless nerds ,as a bonus.

Yeah so last night after finishing Cosmos and a bottle of White I started this and a bottle of Red. By the end I wasn’t sure what I’d just watched but Boy, it was something. Thought it started very weak and very college indy project but once things were moving it tightened up. It had a very strange sense of being great while being very cheesy and not taking itself seriously. The ridiculousness at the end totally made it worth it. As well as Dal Nicole walking around naked the whole film.
 
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