Snow White (2024)
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Guest, it's time once again for the massively important and exciting FoH Asshat Tournament!
Go here and give us your nominations!Who's been the biggest Asshat in the last year? Give us your worst ones!
Nirgon
Log Wizard
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Prince Immediately Regrets Waking Rachel Zegler With A Kiss After She Starts Ranting About The Patriarchy
FAIRY FOREST — Prince Florian quickly regretted his decision to wake Rachel Zegler from her enchanted sleep as she immediately launched into a 3-hour-long tirade about the patriarchy.
babylonbee.com
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Chris
Potato del Grande
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My father always told stories of the nuns beating the shit out of the kids.
By the time I went in the 90s there were no nuns left and it was mostly just a regular school with the occasional prayer.
Anglicans and Catholics in the UK are just regular people, it's the smaller prodestant churches that produce the repressed sex crazed kids.
Chukzombi
Millie's Staff Member
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i hope it does, its a long time before the Hercules train wreck hits theaters, so we need some lolz sooner than that.
Void
BAU BAU
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EXCLUSIVE: 6 Leaked Plot Points From Disney's 'Snow White' Remake
The world has already gotten a peek at Disney's upcoming live-action remake of Snow White, but the plot of the film has been kept tightly under wraps — until now! If you thought the leaked set photos of the dwarfs were controversial, just wait until you hear about the updates they've made to the...
babylonbee.com
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Harshaw
Throbbing Member
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With my Filipino genes in full effect. She has more body hair on her back than I do on my whole body.
Rajaah
Honorable Member
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Same, holy shit. And all I said was that she had nice legs. Well, fuck her legs!
Except I didn't grow up with Rocky in the 80's. I saw it for the first time in like 2002, after I turned 18, then saw it for the second time like 3 weeks ago. Also it sure sounded like you were taking a roundabout dump on that series, way to backpedal.
Rajaah
Honorable Member
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I don't think people are complaining because these movies follow a formula. In fact I think it's the exact opposite. People who know the story of Snow White want to see a viable live action re-creation of it. They then come in and tump over that "formula" but subverting expectations and reimagining the story for a "more modern audience" and that's how they turn it to crap. They want to tell a different story, but get the built in audience of "Snow White". They're effectively wearing Snow White as a type of skin suit to hide the monstrosity they actually are...
That's a terrific metaphor. These people wear the skin suits of things that are actually popular, created by people with actual talent, and use those skin suits as trojan horses for their nation-weakening ideological bullshit.
Was Weimar this bad?
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You were born in 1984 and didn't see any of the Rocky movies until you were 18? I thought I had a sheltered upbringing with an evangelical, paranoid mother who wouldn't let me watch The Simpsons, told me "there's only one Master of the Universe - God" when I was watching He-Man as a child etc but bizarrely she let me watch a pirate copy of Terminator 2 in a bar whilst on holiday as a 9 year old
Rajaah
Honorable Member
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EXCLUSIVE: 6 Leaked Plot Points From Disney's 'Snow White' Remake
The world has already gotten a peek at Disney's upcoming live-action remake of Snow White, but the plot of the film has been kept tightly under wraps — until now! If you thought the leaked set photos of the dwarfs were controversial, just wait until you hear about the updates they've made to the...
- Snow White is now a successful lawyer working at a law firm and is the best lawyer ever: Prince Charming, on the other hand, is a stupid idiot legal intern who can't do anything right. Also, he's gay.
- To avoid ableism, Dopey's name is changed to Cognitively Divergent-y: And he's gay.
Rajaah
Honorable Member
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I had a lot of other shit to do besides watch movies. I never saw any of the Karate Kids either (until a few years ago), despite doing a ton of martial arts as a kid and being literally the target audience. Did make time for TMNT1 and 2 though.
Incidentally Terminator 2 was the first movie I ever saw in a theater. Yeah, the first movie my mom took me to wasn't E.T. or American Tale. It was Terminator Fuckin' 2.
Chukzombi
Millie's Staff Member
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my first theater movie was Star Wars. and i first saw the first two Rocky movies when i was 8 in 1980. i did wait a few years to go see Rocky 3.
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Tuco
I got Tuco'd!
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This sentiment always cracks me up when it comes up. Like, yeah brother, there are hundreds of great movies that came out by 2002, if you didn't watch all of them you must be sheltered.
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Except he literally admitted it was true, moron. Go get pked with your shit-guild
"I had a lot of other shit to do besides watch movies. I never saw any of the Karate Kids either (until a few years ago), despite doing a ton of martial arts as a kid and being literally the target audience"
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