Solo: A Star Wars Story (2018)

  • Guest, it's time once again for the massively important and exciting FoH Asshat Tournament!



    Go here and give us your nominations!
    Who's been the biggest Asshat in the last year? Give us your worst ones!

Valderen

Space Pirate
<Bronze Donator>
4,545
2,772
i-PZcFD8Z-2100x20000.jpg
 
  • 6Like
  • 3Picard
  • 2Barf
Reactions: 12 users

Runnen

Vyemm Raider
1,857
4,521
So were they paid to make today's comic? It's oddly tackles a very specific concern audiences may have (troubled production, low domestic box office) to I guess convince people to go see it?

Or maybe they liked it, and decided to tell people to make up their own mind instead of blindly trusting reviews from randoms.

No that can't be, there must be a conspiracy here.
 
  • 1Salty
Reactions: 1 user

Arbitrary

Tranny Chaser
28,941
79,355
Or maybe they liked it, and decided to tell people to make up their own mind instead of blindly trusting reviews from randoms.

No that can't be, there must be a conspiracy here.

Do I genuinely believe that Disney paid them to make a comic to try and help the film's disappointing box office receipts? Naw. It's the precision in the comic that I find so odd. There's a lack of authenticity to it.
 
  • 1Like
Reactions: 1 user

Runnen

Vyemm Raider
1,857
4,521
Just yanking your chain on the conspiracy stuff, but this whole attitude towards "them new Star Wars movies" is weird to me.

I think the main problem with these new movies is two-fold :

1) they come in an age where most people are seemingly unable to manage their expectations and where every review is either "This movie changed my life" or "This movie raped my puppy".

2) the older movies have been on a pedestal so high and for so long that people are simply unable to accept something new.

The new movies aren't perfect. By a huge shot. They are rather simplistic, 7 didn't take risks, 8 took a bit too many and some didn't pay off, the actors aren't all great, some jokes or lines fall flat, some characters are wasted. All these things are true and valid.

But that also happened in the older movies. I love them deeply, but they ARE flawed too. And not just because the tech was old and they couldn't manage to get it right back then. Acting had bad parts too, at times. Some jokes aren't that subtle. Some characters ARE wasted (Phasma is basically the new Boba Fett, cool armor, only a few lines, and stupid death). Rey has many elements of a Mary Sue (though I'd argue she has flaws too) but Luke did too. Remember how long he lasted against Vader in ESB after only a few days of Force training and ZERO lightsaber practice by Obi-Wan or Yoda? Sure, you can GUESS that he practiced sometimes between 4 and 5 but it's never shown or told, so you have to fill the blanks. Just like you're supposed to guess that maybe Rey is good with a melee weapon because she's used her staff to fend off thugs many times in the past (in fact I'd have thought she'd wield a polearm, that'd have been cool).

Problem is also how much people let the social media hijinks in the "outside world" pollute their view of a story / movie..Solo was butchered before release and never given a chance because (pick your favorite) : OMG pansexual Lando, OMG SJW droid, OMG directors got fired, OMG so many reshoots, OMG actor had to get a coach.. Should I also enjoy reading LOTR less because Tolkien was a racist, or enjoy ASoIaF less because GRRM is a fat lazy fuck who posts football shit 24/7 instead of typing his goddamn book?

In the end, the lead actor was fine, Lando's sexuality is never mentionned except as a throwaway joke by his fuckbot, the droid itself lasts 5 minutes in the movie, the director change and reshoots didn't make it an incoherent mess, and the lead was fine.

I've long ago learned to just accept the parts I enjoy and not let myself get bothered by the parts I don't enjoy as much. I love 4, 5, 6. I really disliked 1, 2 and most of 3 (the anti-cheese versions are much better however). I really liked 7, I liked 8. I really liked Rogue One, and I liked Solo.

All the movies brought some stuff to the universe that is Star Wars : locations, backstories, characters, pieces of history that have made me appreciate the whole saga as a whole, and some give new light or different angles on some things (Cassian Andor shooting an informer in the back or being ordered to kill Galen Erso on sight was a good way to show the Alliance is sometimes very shady, and it's easy to see why a lot of people see them as terrorists).

Solo brought some new stuff too, I liked it for the most part, not everything was good but most of it was. I can understand why some websites or some millenial youtubers would have their world crash and burn when a new movie they based their new lifestyle on doesn't turn out to be the messiah that was promised to them, but on these forums where most people are between 30 and 50, I'd have expected people to manage their expectations a little better by now.
 
  • 3Like
  • 2Solidarity
  • 1Dislike
Reactions: 5 users

Screamfeeder

The Dirtbag
<Banned>
13,309
11,209
So much this.

Solo was fucking great and this is coming from a dude with star wars tattoos on his fucking head. I didn't like some parts and I loved other parts. I explained it already but Disney did not really "lose" money on this. I explained how the finaces for these projects work. Everyone got fucking paid except for maybe a couple of VP's hoping for bigger bonuses at Disney.

Have some goddamn perspective.

If we remade the original star wars today some of you guys would be LOSING your shit. Leia is a princess in a dress but now she has a blaster slaying trained combat troops and shit talks the two male leads constantly?!?!?! SJW FEMINAZI BULLSHIT! Mon Mothma?!?! A WOMAN is in charge? SJW FEMINAZI BULLSHIT! Rabble Rabble Rabble.

Again from a guy that has star wars tattoos on his fucking head, some of you assholes take this shit WAY to seriously.
 
Last edited:
  • 4Solidarity
  • 2EyeRoll
  • 2Like
Reactions: 10 users

Ossoi

Potato del Grande
<Rickshaw Potatoes>
17,712
8,754
Just yanking your chain on the conspiracy stuff, but this whole attitude towards "them new Star Wars movies" is weird to me.

I think the main problem with these new movies is two-fold :

1) they come in an age where most people are seemingly unable to manage their expectations and where every review is either "This movie changed my life" or "This movie raped my puppy".

2) the older movies have been on a pedestal so high and for so long that people are simply unable to accept something new.

The new movies aren't perfect. By a huge shot. They are rather simplistic, 7 didn't take risks, 8 took a bit too many and some didn't pay off, the actors aren't all great, some jokes or lines fall flat, some characters are wasted. All these things are true and valid.

But that also happened in the older movies. I love them deeply, but they ARE flawed too. And not just because the tech was old and they couldn't manage to get it right back then. Acting had bad parts too, at times. Some jokes aren't that subtle. Some characters ARE wasted (Phasma is basically the new Boba Fett, cool armor, only a few lines, and stupid death). Rey has many elements of a Mary Sue (though I'd argue she has flaws too) but Luke did too. Remember how long he lasted against Vader in ESB after only a few days of Force training and ZERO lightsaber practice by Obi-Wan or Yoda? Sure, you can GUESS that he practiced sometimes between 4 and 5 but it's never shown or told, so you have to fill the blanks. Just like you're supposed to guess that maybe Rey is good with a melee weapon because she's used her staff to fend off thugs many times in the past (in fact I'd have thought she'd wield a polearm, that'd have been cool).

Problem is also how much people let the social media hijinks in the "outside world" pollute their view of a story / movie..Solo was butchered before release and never given a chance because (pick your favorite) : OMG pansexual Lando, OMG SJW droid, OMG directors got fired, OMG so many reshoots, OMG actor had to get a coach.. Should I also enjoy reading LOTR less because Tolkien was a racist, or enjoy ASoIaF less because GRRM is a fat lazy fuck who posts football shit 24/7 instead of typing his goddamn book?

In the end, the lead actor was fine, Lando's sexuality is never mentionned except as a throwaway joke by his fuckbot, the droid itself lasts 5 minutes in the movie, the director change and reshoots didn't make it an incoherent mess, and the lead was fine.

I've long ago learned to just accept the parts I enjoy and not let myself get bothered by the parts I don't enjoy as much. I love 4, 5, 6. I really disliked 1, 2 and most of 3 (the anti-cheese versions are much better however). I really liked 7, I liked 8. I really liked Rogue One, and I liked Solo.

All the movies brought some stuff to the universe that is Star Wars : locations, backstories, characters, pieces of history that have made me appreciate the whole saga as a whole, and some give new light or different angles on some things (Cassian Andor shooting an informer in the back or being ordered to kill Galen Erso on sight was a good way to show the Alliance is sometimes very shady, and it's easy to see why a lot of people see them as terrorists).

Solo brought some new stuff too, I liked it for the most part, not everything was good but most of it was. I can understand why some websites or some millenial youtubers would have their world crash and burn when a new movie they based their new lifestyle on doesn't turn out to be the messiah that was promised to them, but on these forums where most people are between 30 and 50, I'd have expected people to manage their expectations a little better by now.


Vader wasn't trying to defeat Luke - he had to keep him alive so he could turn him
 
  • 1Like
Reactions: 1 user

Runnen

Vyemm Raider
1,857
4,521
Vader wasn't trying to defeat Luke - he had to keep him alive so he could turn him

Exactly. Vader toyed with Luke ("Impressive. Most impressive"...) until he got his shoulder sliced open by Luke and then decided to cut the bullshit (and his hand).

Kylo Ren did the same with Rey, then offered her to join him, and then got sliced up for toying a bit too much with the food in his plate.

The reason why the results are different (Luke loses and Rey wins) isn't so much because OMG Rey is such a Mary Sue compared to Jedi Farmboy Luke, it's rather the fact that Kylo Ren is not as badass as Vader was, and that's his main arc really, his huge inferiority complex due to his own prestigious origins.
 
  • 1Like
Reactions: 1 user

Drakain

Trakanon Raider
1,585
689
Saw it again this weekend with my son. Opinion still stands, fun, entertaining movie. Has some flaws and is too dark(lighting) most of the time unless they're outdoors in the daylight. I'm 100% down with Obi-Wan and Boba Fett movies that crossover with this.
 
  • 3Like
Reactions: 2 users

Chris

Potato del Grande
19,436
-10,733
Exactly. Vader toyed with Luke ("Impressive. Most impressive"...) until he got his shoulder sliced open by Luke and then decided to cut the bullshit (and his hand).

Kylo Ren did the same with Rey, then offered her to join him, and then got sliced up for toying a bit too much with the food in his plate.

The reason why the results are different (Luke loses and Rey wins) isn't so much because OMG Rey is such a Mary Sue compared to Jedi Farmboy Luke, it's rather the fact that Kylo Ren is not as badass as Vader was, and that's his main arc really, his huge inferiority complex due to his own prestigious origins.
Rey being good at melee combat is established in TFA since she has to protect herself with her staff several times. Her beating Kylo Ren is fine assuming that Snoke didn't really train him properly on purpose, I bet he wasn't sparring with and learning how to kill those Royal Guards.

The problem with Rey is her being an amazing mechanic, pilot and gunner too. If she was learing how to pilot and fix tech on Jakku, maybe using Star Destroyer or Tie Fighter turrets for target practice fun in her spare time, then they should have:
1) Shown that and not rebel alliance dolls.
2) Not have her living in poverty when she could have salvaged a ship. What did she fix an X Wing and sell it for 10 rations of bread?

Finn should have been the good mechanic, since that could have been his "menial" First Order job rather than the humiliation of being a fucking janitor. He could have also been the good gunner since First Order ships have guns, rather than "I've not shot one of these before" WTF? Rey just soaked up all of Finn's skillpoints :/
 

Screamfeeder

The Dirtbag
<Banned>
13,309
11,209
If she was learing how to pilot and fix tech on Jakku, maybe using Star Destroyer or Tie Fighter turrets for target practice fun in her spare time, then they should have:
I forget, did Lukes T-16 Skyhopper come equipped with AG-2G Quad laser cannons? Then how was he able to take down an experienced Tie Fighter his first time using them. They should have shown us Luke training on those instead of just "this dude is good at stuff like this naturally". I would totally watch a movie of Luke strapping together a bunch of pneumatic cannons together and going "pew pew" on a crashed X-Wing. Totally worth everyone's time.
 

Chris

Potato del Grande
19,436
-10,733
I forget, did Lukes T-16 Skyhopper come equipped with AG-2G Quad laser cannons? Then how was he able to take down an experienced Tie Fighter his first time using them. They should have shown us Luke training on those instead of just "this dude is good at stuff like this naturally". I would totally watch a movie of Luke strapping together a bunch of pneumatic cannons together and going "pew pew" on a crashed X-Wing. Totally worth everyone's time.
Luke said that he practised hitting womprats with some gun or other. That's all you need.

Rey Character Classes:
Pilot
Engineer
Melee Combat
Gunner (added Movie 2, after no training)

Luke Character Classes:
Pilot
Gunner
Melee Combat (added Movie 3, after fucking Yoda training)

Finn Character Classes:
 

Alex

Still a Music Elitist
14,665
7,482
I work in social media data analytics and work with Disney. They want to launch a research project across social media channels to figure out why Solo did so poorly. I'll be following this one closely.
 

Screamfeeder

The Dirtbag
<Banned>
13,309
11,209
Luke said that he practised hitting womprats with some gun or other. That's all you need.

Rey Character Classes:
Pilot
Engineer
Melee Combat
Gunner

Luke Character Classes:
Pilot
Gunner

Finn Character Classes:
All three are fictional characters in a universe full of magic gaia powers and teddy bear aliens that can stop a major military power with strategically placed logs. Finn fumblefucking his way around a starship ranks pretty low here.

But, if you REALLY want me to geek out on you then I would simply ask you why Captain Phasma had a "janitor" as a member of her elite FN-Corps on a secret mission to Jakku with the Second In Charge of the First Order. Pretty cushy spot for some useless janitor. I'd also go on to ask you if you think they just throw Stormtrooper armor on anyone or if those guys go through any kind of basic training to learn how to shoot and the basics of combat, tactics and strategy. Lastly I would ask if you think a guy running sanitation duties on a giant laser planet might have any kind of idea how complicated machines work.

But I don't want to be that guy so I won't do any of that.
 
Last edited:

Asshat wormie

2023 Asshat Award Winner
<Gold Donor>
16,820
30,968
I work in social media data analytics and work with Disney. They want to launch a research project across social media channels to figure out why Solo did so poorly. I'll be following this one closely.
I already have a conclusion to the study:

"Stop making SJW movies and just make movies"
 
  • 1Like
  • 1EyeRoll
  • 1Seriously?
Reactions: 3 users

Screamfeeder

The Dirtbag
<Banned>
13,309
11,209
I already have a conclusion to the study:

"Stop making SJW movies and just make movies"
You sound like the kind of guy that would see Yarna d'al' Gargan and write a VERY long FB post about how Star Wars is shoving Fat Acceptance down your throat and you're tired of it.
 
  • 1Like
Reactions: 1 user

Zweischneid

Molten Core Raider
816
-774
I already have a conclusion to the study:

"Stop making SJW movies and just make movies"


Seeing how it's the one with the throw-back space western white male lead that "failed", that statement seems more like a desperate Breittarts fever-dream than ever.

If Disney were to go down that Alex Jones idiocy (they won't), they'd compare Solo numbers to the numbers of the one with the black guy and the girl in the lead and, well, numbers speak for themselves and would also fit the trend with the most recent hyper-successes like Black Panther or indie-movie star-breakouts like Get Out.
 
  • 1Like
Reactions: 1 user

Asshat wormie

2023 Asshat Award Winner
<Gold Donor>
16,820
30,968
The analytics of social media will be full of Screamshitters and Zweishitters defending this movie. Given this, it is most certainly guaranteed that the conclusion about why it failed will be "SJW abortion".