Star Wars: The Force Awakens (2015)

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Sylas

<Gold Donor>
3,681
4,212
only shitty things are shitty to me.

which isn't really fair. This movie isn't shitty per se, this movie was mediocre, just sorta bleh. it had no soul. it wasn't absolute shit, it just wasn't nearly as good as the slob job praise it's getting.

It made the same mistakes (I wanna call this, idk, maybe editing?) that the prequels did in that regard. It moves from shot to shot, scene to scene with no pacing, plot or story cohesion. This magnifies the mistakes and plotholes of the film. It seems like the film is a parody of itself. In 10 seconds Finn goes from being a bad guy to being some hippy coward to mass murdering all the people he's known his entire life and instantly he and Ace Pilot (Poe) are doing a step brothers parody "Did we just become best friends? Yep. Wanna go do karate in the Garage? Yep" and then after about 45 seconds of knowing the guy Ace disappears for another 90% of the film. At some point they are reunited best buds? This is the definition of shitty film making.

Unlike the prequels though, it seems like somewhere out there, there was a real film made. At some point it had a soul that was gutted and it was hastily edited down into a ANH remake halfway through the editing process. It's really quite glaring, I don't see how you aren't seeing it.

With the prequels they filmed a terrible, boring story and failed to edit it into a cohesive film. This one seems like they had intended to film a decent (if wholly uninspired and unoriginal story) and edited it down to clips that would make for good trailers and wouldn't take any risks of repeating the prequel disaster. In that process the movie lost it's soul.

But whatev it's kinda a dead horse. If you thought the movie was ok, good for you. If you thought it was a great film you are demonstrably wrong. I realize that I'm (currently) in the minority holding that opinion just like I was when the prequels released and faggots just like you (probably you) slobbed all over lucas' dick back then too. (if only eq had launched and became super successful in the mid 90s we'd have forums dating back to the prequel era) thus I pretty much have ignored this thread for the last 150+ pages cus i'm not about shitting up threads. but if you ask i'll answer.

But be honest, you don't think it's fucked up that the only defense you have, 300 fucking pages of praise for this film all boils down at it's core to "It's better than the prequels?" seriously? that's all it takes? Ride Along for Best Picture, better than the prequels trololol.
 

Royal

Connoisseur of Exotic Pictures
15,077
10,643
/shrug

They weren't gonna make something that every single person, even every single Star Wars fan, liked. If you enjoyed it just take comfort in the fact that we'll be getting more of the same in the future (and by the same I mean what Famm said; a Star Wars version of the MCU) and let those who didn't gnash their teeth in vain. The franchise is back on a track that let's you enjoy the ride.
 

The Ancient_sl

shitlord
7,386
16
In a few years when the nostalgia wears off we'll be able to have a legitimate discussion of this mediocre film, opinions will magically change (just like they did with Phantom Menace et al), cementing it's place just above the prequels in order of shittiness.
I'm a few years you will still be wrong, but will have some new thing to act stupid about.
 

Zignor 3_sl

shitlord
180
1
/shrug

They weren't gonna make something that every single person, even every single Star Wars fan, liked. If you enjoyed it just take comfort in the fact that we'll be getting more of the same in the future (and by the same I mean what Famm said; a Star Wars version of the MCU) and let those who didn't gnash their teeth in vain. The franchise is back on a track that let's you enjoy the ride.
Yes, and I certainly don't think most people are giving it a pass and/or are saying it was "good enough" simply because it was better than the prequels. I thought from the beginning that this is a solidly great Star Wars movie, and I'd have thought the same had the prequels never existed and this was the first film in the franchise released since 1983. People are forgetting that the prequels got the initial love that they did (TPM in particular) largely because the hype at the time was unstoppable. Ironically, it was the prequels themselves that mostly killed the possibility of that phenomenon ever happening again. I certainly don't see that happening here, and in five years I don't expect a massive shift in opinions regarding TFA to occur in any direction.

I'm much older now, and far more of a jaded, miserable shit of an adult than I was in 1999, so while I was excited for TFA, I was honestly ready to expect anything, and I really loved the movie. Sure, not everything was awesome, and some things were legitimately stupid, but that hasn't taken much away from the experience for me. Star Wars is back as far as I'm concerned, and that's pretty awesome.
 

The Ancient_sl

shitlord
7,386
16
I'm definitely not forgetting about the love TPM got at release. I felt like I was taking crazy pills those first weeks...The cheering and hollering in the theater, while I wondered if these people had just watched the same film as me. Discussions with my friends where a good half the group argued how great it was solely on the strength of one over-choreographed lightsaber battle...

This movie is nothing like that.
 

Rathgar_sl

shitlord
61
0
(if wholly uninspired and unoriginal story)
This made me giggle, the 7th film in a 38 year old IP, not to mention hundred's of books, dozens of video games, several tv series, thousand's of toys and whatever else I'm forgetting, being called an unoriginal story. That ship sailed along time ago man, get over it. You can't make anything Star Wars related and be "original" anymore.
 

Blakkheim

Karazhan Raider
8,174
37,373
TheSearchForSpock.jpg
 

Pancreas

Vyemm Raider
1,132
3,819
So I finally got around to seeing this movie last night. I wasn't expecting anything. I had avoided reviews and spoilers and had not really paid much attention to the production hype except for one guy's near religious experience when he walked onto the set of the Millennium Falcon (Maybe that was Kevin Smith?). I knew they were back to using puppets and more practical sets and whatnot but that's about it.

OK, so the movie was a by the numbers remake of Episode IV, expect with modern graphics and shittier dialogue. The parallels are too numerous to list and obviously intentional.

That said I enjoyed the movie. It was not some life changing experience or the second coming of Star Jesus, despite Mark Hamill's spot on impression, but it was good*.

The sad part about the movie is that you have too many characters and none of them move much on the personal development scale. You get a blip out of Ray as her force powers come online, but they happen in such an unnatural and automatic way you hardly care or notice. Han Solo carries the entire movie on his shoulders, and we see where that gets him.

The movie tries abundantly hard to tie itself to the original trilogy and literally blows up anything associated with episodes I through III. The republic senate is toast, and when Ray and Token are running away from Mos Eisley Part Deux they start running to a pod racer/runner thing right before it gets nuked from orbit in one of the more impressive explosions in the movie.

I think the fact the the Rebel alliance has now dispatched not one, not two but three massive orbiting battle fortresses is basically comical. I mean I can't imagine how the empire/sith/first order can get financing for their projects after three colossal failures. Dark Side Contractors Inc. must be toxic at this point and their insurance rates have to be astronomical. Who wound bond these guys?

The lightsaber battles were improved this time around in terms of being slower and less flashy, but now with more feelingT. Of course it falls a little flat because:refer to anemic character development

Ray and Solo didn't have the chemistry needed to really sell the connection they should have had, and I blame the dialogue for that.

Other than that there were some really contrived action sequences and Finn's character was really ragged around the edges. He should have had to fight really hard for relevance. Instead the movie served him up some meatball scenes where he just became the focus of attention for no good reason. Like the sith knight dude, han's son... what's his face. (I honestly don't know his name despite it having be said a handful of times.) He should have been dismissive of a rogue trooper and probably had a fail safe built into the clone that crippled him every time they met, that Fin would have had to overcome. I dunno... just SOMETHING to make Finn's journey seem like more than a comedy of errors on the empire's part.

Anyways, it was an above average but still mediocre movie, which means it was a MASSIVE fucking improvement over the first three episodes. Hopefully both the Original trilogy and the Prequals will fade to the background and some new territory can be mapped out in the next two? movies.

Overall 6.9999/10
 

Jive Turkey

Karen
6,722
9,087
It made the same mistakes (I wanna call this, idk, maybe editing?) that the prequels did in that regard. It moves from shot to shot, scene to scene with no pacing, plot or story cohesion. This magnifies the mistakes and plotholes of the film. It seems like the film is a parody of itself. In 10 seconds Finn goes from being a bad guy to being some hippy coward to mass murdering all the people he's known his entire life and instantly he and Ace Pilot (Poe) are doing a step brothers parody "Did we just become best friends? Yep. Wanna go do karate in the Garage? Yep" and then after about 45 seconds of knowing the guy Ace disappears for another 90% of the film. At some point they are reunited best buds? This is the definition of shitty film making.
What movie were you watching? When did you see Finn as a bad guy? The very first time we see him, he's busy not shooting people.
And if the guy who saved me from prison and certain death wound up not only being alive, but had also finished the mission I started, I'd be pretty happy to see him too.
 

Famm

Ahn'Qiraj Raider
11,041
794
The republic senate is toast, and when Ray and Token are running away from Mos Eisley Part Deux they start running to a pod racer/runner thing right before it gets nuked from orbit in one of the more impressive explosions in the movie
Huh? They called it a "quad jumper" not "pod jumper", obviously for its four engines and it was nowhere near a pod racer.

pYCdkjN.jpg
 

Jive Turkey

Karen
6,722
9,087
and when Ray and Token are running away from Mos Eisley Part Deux they start running to a pod racer/runner thing right before it gets nuked from orbit in one of the more impressive explosions in the movie.
Edit: Shit. Famm beat me to it

It was one of these. More spaceship than podracer

12393784_235703753427340_1711263883_n.jpg
 

Pancreas

Vyemm Raider
1,132
3,819
I guess the sound in my theater was kinda shitty or I am losing my hearing. Probably a little of both. I guess I should have "RTFM" before going to see the film though, would have probably answered some questions for me.
 

AngryGerbil

Poet Warrior
<Donor>
17,781
25,897
In a few years there will be two or three more movies. This is the Marvel Cinematic Universe...Star Wars edition. I'm perfectly OK with that, its what SW is anyway. Its not some sacrosanct pedestalized high art in anyone's mind except uber dorks like us. Its a big dumb tentpole space fantasy movie franchise that gets pre-pubescent boys excited to ask for xmas and birthday presents. Get over yourself.
+1

Star Wars isn't a Maserati, it's a Roller Coaster.
 

AngryGerbil

Poet Warrior
<Donor>
17,781
25,897
Also Panc, Token isn't a clone. He's a captured brainwashed cultish child-soldier who is now grown up and leaving the flock.

I admit they didn't do the concept it's full justice but I do love the idea of a self-realized Storm Trooper who wakes himself up.
 

Gavinmad

Mr. Poopybutthole
43,752
52,326
Yeah and the sun crusher exists (sort of) as a precedent for a star wars superweapon capable of wiping out an entire star system. the difference is that A: it had to actually be in the system to do it and B: it was using the systems own star, not its own weaponry

*edit*

Judging from the past 6 Star Wars movies, there is only ever 1 black dude in the galaxy at a time, so yeah, token seems pretty accurate.
 

Khane

Got something right about marriage
20,343
14,006
He definitely is a Token. In a galaxy far far away he's a stereotypical black American male. Whitewashed of course to make him the lovable, family friendly idiot.

His character is honestly almost as bad as Jar Jar. I was rooting for him to be dead when Kylo Ren slashed his back.