Star Wars: The Last Jedi (2017)
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Guest, it's time once again for the massively important and exciting FoH Asshat Tournament!
Go here and give us your nominations!Who's been the biggest Asshat in the last year? Give us your worst ones!
Oldbased
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Saw that it was available to buy from VUDU but having remembered some bad reviews decided to check here first. Guess I'll save the $20 and maybe even rental and just wait for it to hit the prems.
People hated Rogue One and TFA but I thought those were ok overall. Sure there was plenty of shit to nitpick but my bar for Hollywood is real fucking low as of late.
People hated Rogue One and TFA but I thought those were ok overall. Sure there was plenty of shit to nitpick but my bar for Hollywood is real fucking low as of late.
Gamma Rays
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Avoid spending money on this thing, you'll regret it.
I say that and will point out that I own 2 of the prequels on DVD.
I say that and will point out that I own 2 of the prequels on DVD.
Muligan
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I posted about this earlier. This is probably the worst part of what Rian Johnson did to the franchise. They can look forward to the next 50 years of leveraging the Star Wars name all the way but you cannot mistreat it's story and characters and expect too much. Here they are building a Star Wars Land, developing a TV show, streaming service, and who knows how many movies and he took every bit of the lifeblood out of the franchise. I complained a little about Episode 7 but honestly, he was dealt a perfect hand. He could have put some fan service into Rey and/or Snoke's back stories, added a few cliche moments, and gave a little twist in the end and Johnson would have been the king of the universe. I guess hindsight is 20/20. If Rey would have been Qui Gon or Obiwan's kin the fans may have complained, Snoke could have been Plagueius or a Palp clone and the fans may have complained. Finn could have been tied to Lando, Luke could have been a BA, etc. etc. and the fans may have complained but he not only severed the ties to the past but he took away all hype of the future. It was unreal how many fan theories and videos were posted after 7 dissecting all these characters trying to figure out what was going on with Star Wars and now, nothing. Absolutely nothing because who cares now? What's left to theorize about or anticipate?
I don't know if J.J. has it in him, but if he can somehow save all of this, he would go down in history.
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Muligan
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This may be old news to many of you but i'm slowly catching up on some of this stuff. I believe this video is really telling to how Mark felt (which we all knew and he's been very open about it) and how Rian Johnson was going forward with it regardless. Listening to RJ makes me think he's somewhat out of touch with Star Wars and the fans but he believes in his own genius far more than he probably should. Maybe that kind of confidence is what makes people successful in their industry but major kudos to Mark for being the professional he is....
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Malakriss
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Besides porg plushies, what exactly did TLJ do to promote merchandising to children? Set a bunch of animals "free" on a casino planet where they will be rounded up a week later? Did anyone look at the piece of the shit speeders they had on the planet and think "I absolutely NEED that lego set"?
Oldbased
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Ya, don't worry. My budget is pretty tight anyways. I'll catch it on HBO or whatever in 3-5 months.
Currently I'm binge watching all episodes of Magnum PI then hitting up Sanford and Son on Encore. That puts me into May.
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Gamma Rays
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Take the $20 and flush it down the toilet. Then find something in your house that you might have cherished since your childhood and set it on fire. You have now saved yourself 2 hours and had the same experience as watching this movie.
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I think we might just be saved from this, if Solo does as horribly as some are suspecting it will. Whereas they've been really "progressive" with their direction, it's becoming relatively apparent that they also have started , or accelerated, the detachment of the historical fans of this franchise.
Kovaks
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The Darth Vader and main star wars comics marvel are putting out are pretty amazing
jayrebb
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George sold Lucas Film to Disney so people could have jobs. One of the details of the contract was guaranteed employment.
Do what Kovaks implied, and check those comics out. Try not to sour on the whole franchise just yet, but absolutely boycott the movies. Boycotting Lucas Film overall will only hurt the wrong people. You can hurt creative by just sticking to a movie boycott-- they have an entirely different balance sheet.
Jozu
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Episode 9 can still be OK. I mean, what were the absolute dumbest things about episode 8?
Now I have admittedly not even watched the entire film, but I have read the major plot points.
So the dumbest things that happened were (from the consensus I have gathered)....
Snoke's stupid death, and unexplained back story.
Luke's stupid death and associated opportunity loss.
The handling of Leia.
Finn's entire arc, Rose and Phasma being useless.
Rey's apparent non-important lineage and associated opportunity loss.
The entire plot in the end concerning the resistance and their entire motives given the outcome of what happened with Luke's force projection and death and Finns attempted suicide mission and all of the conundrums associated with that ( what was accomplished, why did they do what they did etc)
Now I didnt list those in order of how dumb each plot point was, just listed them in general. Some of those things are redeemable, and some arent. There are even more dumb things in this movie, such as the wasted screen-time with Canto Bight, the ridiculous gravity bomber scene space battle early on, Marry Poppins Leia, the list goes on and on. But the major points that people are upset with I have listed (did I miss any?). JJ Abrams has a huge task ahead of him, but he can rework the whole Rey backstory thing and give it more weight, (even if it doesnt mean associating her with previous characters from a biological standpoint) He can still somehow revive Finns existence and make him more integral to the story or actually give him the death he should of gotten during the final battle in episode 8. Leia and Carrie Fisher passing away will be interesting as to how they go about writing her out, but if he does it right he can theoretically wrap that up in a way that fans are OK with. The two things he cant take back is Snoke's death, and Lukes death. Those are huge fucking problems. Obviously most fans would have probably preferred that Luke died in a dignified way after being a fucking badass at somepoint at the end of EP 9, and Snoke could have been further explored and remained a nebulous force that was still providing some type of balance to Kylo (instead of the stupid fucking force communication bullshit with Rey).
So with that said, Im not sure how JJ can repair something that is so utterly broken. He also obviously cant fix a retarded plot that was ep 8 and everything associated with the characters actions and "growth" that they experienced in that film. He cant just wipe all that shit away and start over. He has to somehow manage all of those frayed plot lines and weave them back together to not only bring closure to this trilogy, but basically salvage the entire franchise in fans' eyes.
edit: As far as what he COULD do, I think he needs to keep it simple. That involves giving fans what they want, kind of like what he did with Ep 7. So that means somehow linking Rey to Obi Wan, whether she was like secretly orphaned, or there is something to her unique place in the Star Wars universe in terms of the world itself, not just her being randomly "special". Give some type of explanation of what Snokes motives truly were, why he was doing what he was doing, where he came from, etc. Maybe do it in a way where Kylo is reflecting so its not so heavy handed. Lastly, he can pay homage to Luke by using his force ghost as some type of mechanism that provides council and or encouragement to Rey or something just so fans can get some "revenge" on Rian Johnson and get their Luke back in SOME way.
I doubt all of those things will be done, but at the very least he can throw fans a bone and not try to be too clever with how shit shakes out. I honestly wouldnt mind just seeing some great lightsbaer duels, with some badass space battles (not too much as I feel they have focused more on that recently) and awesome new planet locations and visuals that arent fucking stupid. It seems like its a huge task but its still Star Wars, he can do it. As bad as Ep 8 was, Kylo Ren is still kind of interesting and Adam Driver is a great actor. If they do something intelligent with his story arc, and somehow make his end satisfying and clever, he can totally do it.
Now I have admittedly not even watched the entire film, but I have read the major plot points.
So the dumbest things that happened were (from the consensus I have gathered)....
Snoke's stupid death, and unexplained back story.
Luke's stupid death and associated opportunity loss.
The handling of Leia.
Finn's entire arc, Rose and Phasma being useless.
Rey's apparent non-important lineage and associated opportunity loss.
The entire plot in the end concerning the resistance and their entire motives given the outcome of what happened with Luke's force projection and death and Finns attempted suicide mission and all of the conundrums associated with that ( what was accomplished, why did they do what they did etc)
Now I didnt list those in order of how dumb each plot point was, just listed them in general. Some of those things are redeemable, and some arent. There are even more dumb things in this movie, such as the wasted screen-time with Canto Bight, the ridiculous gravity bomber scene space battle early on, Marry Poppins Leia, the list goes on and on. But the major points that people are upset with I have listed (did I miss any?). JJ Abrams has a huge task ahead of him, but he can rework the whole Rey backstory thing and give it more weight, (even if it doesnt mean associating her with previous characters from a biological standpoint) He can still somehow revive Finns existence and make him more integral to the story or actually give him the death he should of gotten during the final battle in episode 8. Leia and Carrie Fisher passing away will be interesting as to how they go about writing her out, but if he does it right he can theoretically wrap that up in a way that fans are OK with. The two things he cant take back is Snoke's death, and Lukes death. Those are huge fucking problems. Obviously most fans would have probably preferred that Luke died in a dignified way after being a fucking badass at somepoint at the end of EP 9, and Snoke could have been further explored and remained a nebulous force that was still providing some type of balance to Kylo (instead of the stupid fucking force communication bullshit with Rey).
So with that said, Im not sure how JJ can repair something that is so utterly broken. He also obviously cant fix a retarded plot that was ep 8 and everything associated with the characters actions and "growth" that they experienced in that film. He cant just wipe all that shit away and start over. He has to somehow manage all of those frayed plot lines and weave them back together to not only bring closure to this trilogy, but basically salvage the entire franchise in fans' eyes.
edit: As far as what he COULD do, I think he needs to keep it simple. That involves giving fans what they want, kind of like what he did with Ep 7. So that means somehow linking Rey to Obi Wan, whether she was like secretly orphaned, or there is something to her unique place in the Star Wars universe in terms of the world itself, not just her being randomly "special". Give some type of explanation of what Snokes motives truly were, why he was doing what he was doing, where he came from, etc. Maybe do it in a way where Kylo is reflecting so its not so heavy handed. Lastly, he can pay homage to Luke by using his force ghost as some type of mechanism that provides council and or encouragement to Rey or something just so fans can get some "revenge" on Rian Johnson and get their Luke back in SOME way.
I doubt all of those things will be done, but at the very least he can throw fans a bone and not try to be too clever with how shit shakes out. I honestly wouldnt mind just seeing some great lightsbaer duels, with some badass space battles (not too much as I feel they have focused more on that recently) and awesome new planet locations and visuals that arent fucking stupid. It seems like its a huge task but its still Star Wars, he can do it. As bad as Ep 8 was, Kylo Ren is still kind of interesting and Adam Driver is a great actor. If they do something intelligent with his story arc, and somehow make his end satisfying and clever, he can totally do it.
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Rengak
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I didn't really mind Rey's parents being nobodies. I think its nice not have another famous Jedi kid running around. Also, Rey and Kylo's minds were being directly manipulated by Snoke most of the movie, so it is very easy to retcon using the 'a wizard did it' defense.
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