The Fast Food Thread

This kiosk argument is fucking stupid. To get inside the store itself, you are likely grabbing the same door pull outside as every single other person that day. I am willing to bet that kiosk touchscreen is cleaned about 100x more often than the front door handle. Bunch of germophobes up in here.

I hate that many fast food bathrooms no longer have paper towels. fuck trees, I want my goddamned paper towels. sometimes when im feelin like a germophobe I hate washing my hands then having to touch a nasty bathroom door that always opens inward.

Jysin said:

Bunch of germophobes up in here.

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So far it's only chaos whose afraid of germy germs here. Don't lump all these fine folks in with his cowardly ass.

My digusting fast food habits over the years have built up my immune system to levels that even the Russians couldn't penetrate.

You wouldn't know if they had. They're master penetrators.

McCheese said:

Paging Hekotat for proper food throwing procedure.

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Step 1: Scream obscenities, if fast food worker is a female, over-use the word "Cunt". Once the word has been used a minimum of 3 times move on to step 2.

Step 2: Once acceptable rage limits have been reached by both parties and civility is in the distant horizon proceed to step 3.

Step 3: Using your right hand grab the fast food bag filled with food you can no longer enjoy because you have been slighted by a court Jester and that simply will not stand. (Left hand is acceptable in European countries. Using the opposite arm will result in less velocity).

Step 4: Reach as far back as possible without hitting passengers or passenger seat, ensure that your torso twists as much as possible so that maximum torque is achieved. Bring arm forward in a horizontal arc with a trajectory that will allow maximum velocity. Release bag at the point where the torso has twisted in opposite direction.

Step 5: As projectile speeds towards fast food workers with a might and fury that rivals Mjolnir you will wonder what has gone wrong with your life and why you are filled with shame. Ignore these feelings, reignite the rage and continue to step 6.

Step 6: Do a massive burnout as the bag makes contact with the fast food workers, or if you're in a minivan slowly pull off. Proceed to the next higher tier restaurant to acquire food, repeat steps if necessary.


Edit: Spelling errors.

I ride BART. No touchscreen intimidates me.

Alex said:

I ride BART. No touchscreen intimidates me.

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You ride Bart? Aye carumba!

Soygen said:

I think I actually go inside a fast food place maybe 0.1% of the time I eat fast food.

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Yeah, but do you look at those filthy drive-through menus with bare eyes? That's fucking disgusting, man. Do you know how many other people have looked at those signs? Eye bleach is the only answer here.

I also won't touch those menus at chik-fil-a or whatever. "Do you need to see a menu sir?" NO, SARAH, I CAME HERE FOR A CHICKEN SANDWICH NOT HEPATITIS.

Lofthouse summer seasonals are everywhere now. So great! Strawberry, lemon, and watermelon. Three of the best flavors. If you're still one of the poor saps who hasn't tried the best cookies in the world yet, now is the time.

Careful if you eat them over your keyboard. I had a carton of strawberry the other day and now I have mashed up pink sprinkles down between/below all my keys.

Tried these today:



3 / 10 - Instead of being a subtle lime flavor, its super in your face and comes off really salty. Reasonable heat, but it is not complex like Tapatío. Absolutely smothered in flavor dust to the point you don't even taste tortilla chips. It's just really crunchy texture sticks covered in mediocre to bad flavoring.

Do not recommend.

Jysin said:

Tried these today:

4 / 10 - Instead of being a subtle lime flavor, its super in your face and comes off really salty. Reasonable heat, but it is not complex like Tapatío. Absolutely smothered in flavor dust to the point you don't even taste tortilla chips. It's just really crunchy texture sticks covered in mediocre to bad flavoring.

Do not recommend.

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I concur. Like almost every other variant of Doritos, they're awful. I also dislike the shape.

McCheese said:

Lofthouse summer seasonals are everywhere now. So great! Strawberry, lemon, and watermelon. Three of the best flavors. If you're still one of the poor saps who hasn't tried the best cookies in the world yet, now is the time.

Careful if you eat them over your keyboard. I had a carton of strawberry the other day and now I have mashed up pink sprinkles down between/below all my keys.

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Can confirm the strawberry are baller as fuck. Need to try the lemon.

Revised it down to a 3 of 10 vs a 4. Sitting here 15 mins later and this aftertaste is disgusting. I might have eaten 10 pieces tops. Going to leave the bag around for my coworkers.

I haven't had a Lofthouse cookie in a long time.

McCheese said:

Lofthouse summer seasonals are everywhere now. So great! Strawberry, lemon, and watermelon. Three of the best flavors. If you're still one of the poor saps who hasn't tried the best cookies in the world yet, now is the time.

Careful if you eat them over your keyboard. I had a carton of strawberry the other day and now I have mashed up pink sprinkles down between/below all my keys.

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What is their air speed velocity?

Where can you get these bad boys?