The Tanoubliette: Pussy Hurt and Delusions or TTPHAD for short.

Lithose · May 21, 2015

Cad_sl said:
Especially as sensitive as everyone is about sex and rejection, and how uptight everyone is and how much everyone lies about sex (queue Antarius with his redpill comments), it's not any surprise that casual hookups followed by total rejection cause mad rage in females. She felt like she was IN LOVE. And he casually discarded her. She will TEACH HIM HER VALUE.

Right? I find it extremely ironic that feminists make two arguments in conjunction, but can't see a third that naturally rises. 1.) That psychological trauma can severely affect interpretation of events. (Sure, I agree)--and this is why some women who are raped do very odd things after, even talk to their attacker again. 2.) Bad relationships, even if not legally abusive, can be extremely traumatizing--as many forms of abuse don't cross legal boundaries (Emotional ect) and trauma arises naturally from various things at the end of a relationship. Heck, you can even get PTSD from someone being mean on twitter--imagine if your boyfriend had sex with you then called you a useless whore who isn't even worth the time for him to get it up for. (That guy a fucker who probably needs an ass kicking? Sure. Is it illegal? nope.)

Seems to me there is ample room for someone who has actually be legitimately hurt, and is extremely angry, to fudge things in the heat of the moment--again, even if only to illustrate to her friends what an asshole this guy was. The friends begin to pressure her to go to the police. She then has a choice--S.) go to the police. B.) not go and tell her friends it's not worth it (Perpetuating the "men never get caught!" narrative, which is only reinforced because the guy might be a legitimate douche bag and it's easy to believe he is a rapist.), C.) tell her friends she lied.

Now, seems like telling your friends you lied would be extremely difficult. So is it really hard to believe that options A and B sometimes happen? To me this seems like human behavior--guys do it, maybe about different subjects, like when a guy is trying to justify fighting someone who is making them angry--but guys do do this kind of "fudging" the facts shit. Fuck me, entire countries do it when justifying their actions for war. But somehow--women, completely immune.

Cad · May 21, 2015

Mist and Tanoomba both have this disease where they go "things I don't like that happen" get conflated with "things that should be illegal" or "problems we should do something about." People being shitty on the internet isn't illegal. People being shitty to each other in relationships isn't illegal. Getting chicks a little boozed up and using that to get them to make questionable sex decisions isn't illegal. Hell, chances are thats how Tanoomba came to be.

But these are "Things we don't like" so it's now "problematic."

I wonder if it's any coincidence that "rape culture" has become a thing now that colleges are in full hookup culture mode. In the 60's and 70's when rapes were far more numerous than they are now, I don't remember "rape culture" being a thing. Never heard it mentioned. But now that college kids have no semblance of relationships and just hook up (which probably isn't healthy for the female psyche, but probably works fine for the guys) we have a "rape problem."

Ok. Jennifer Lawrence Thumbs Up.gif.

Lithose · May 21, 2015

hodj_sl said:
How people perceive events has been demonstrated to be wildly out of phase with how events actually proceed. Hence why so many people in the Brown shooting case have such wildly contradictory memories of how that played out. Some said he had his back turned, others said he was charging with fists raised, so forth and so on.

Human perception is a very fickle and malleable thing. Repeat a lie to yourself often enough, especially if you want to believe it, and it becomes as real to you as if it were the truth.

Exactly. One thing I know most cops say is how bad eye witness testimony is. Even with just a modicum of stress, human memory sucks in terms of fine details. And I don't think anyone will argue that having a terrible sexual partner, or someone who is just fucking mean (But not rapey) puts people under a ton of stress. I mean, just because someone didn't rape someone? Does not mean they weren't huge douches; it's technically legal to be severely emotionally abusive, as long as you don't cross certain boundaries. That can really fuck people up--especially a young, naive person who is suffering from considerable stress due to the stage of life they are in.

For example, lets take a guy who sleeps with a girl, gets consent, but then puts her up against the wall, uses her, zips up and walks away, treating her effectively worse than most people treat prostitutes (But not rape). When she calls, he yells at her and calls her a dumb slut or some equally terrible thing, maybe even makes fun of how easy she was. Girl feels guilty she let such a douche use her, those emotions, combined with the natural trauma of even being around an asshole like that? Compound on themselves. Eventually, when she talks to her friends, the cold, cheap sex gets a few flourishes to make it not partly her fault this scuzzy asshole touched her. She says "I didn't even want him...I knew he was an asshole, I could tell...but I had so much to drink, and he kept pushing me." (her friends commiserate as she cries about this asshole taking advantage of her.)....Now those friends start telling her she's been raped. (She hasn't--she was abused, yes, not raped though).

All the sudden it gets a life of it's own. And once you tell a lie enough, especially one that "feels right", it becomes incredibly easy to believe it. This isn't just a thing women do, men do it too. They usually exaggerate crazy shit women do to make themselves feel better about ditching or losing them though. But it's pretty easy to see how someone might not be raped, but feel completely like they were raped....Especially if outside sources continually confirm it for them, and reinforce that reality. It's not that women are evil manipulators--it's that relationships can be BRUTAL even for mature adults, and lets face it? Many women will run into predatory men who aren't rapists but are dicks. Mix that, with an immature, college age person? And none of this seems far fetched.

That's not saying rapes aren't a very real problem, they are. But it's not hard to see how bad memories and exaggerations crop up.

Tanoomba · May 21, 2015

Cad: "In her messages, why didn't she mention the rape? Why didn't she say, look that was not cool what happened. I didn't like how you X Y and Z. At least it wouldn't look made up later. She mentions NOTHING about a forcible rape? 1-2 days later? And meets him at parties?"

Perhaps she wasn't comfortable talking about rape via text messages. Of course she met him at parties. They still interacted in the same circles. She was still trying to maintain a sense of normalcy after what happened. The guy wasn't a villain, he was a close friend who she had slept with twice before, who one night, after a couple of drinks, (allegedly) crossed a line and got carried away, overpowering her and having sex against her will. The point is, there IS a feasible explanation for the way she acted.

Cad: "Sorry, but the evidence tends towards lying crazy bitch in this one. There isn't proof he DIDNT rape her, of course, so anything is possible. But seeing what documentation there is, and seeing just how double-down crazy she is with the mattress shit, I think the conclusion is obvious."

Clearly you and many others do. I see that as people believing what they want to believe, as the evidence I've seen does not lead me to so "obvious" a conclusion. If anything, "girl is raped by friend, waits too long to act on it" is much more feasible than "girl accuses friend of extremely serious crime because he wouldn't go steady with her". Also, the mattress thing doesn't seem crazy at all to me, but I got my first degree at an art school.

Cad: "How do you go from "it's just not worth it" after someone forcibly anally rapes you, to "I think I'll carry a mattress for two years and be super 100% dedicated and follow through and make this my LIFE" ? Because the woman was scorned. And she was scorned again when the college refused to believe her."

There is no logical progression from your premise to your conclusion. Watch this:
She went from "It's just not worth it" to "Shit, there were other victims too?" to "Let's fight this!" to "Shit, they don't believe us" to "Fuck 'em, I'm not letting this slide, I'm sticking to my guns and turning it into an art project"
See? No scorn needed.

Quaid: "I never laughed at you dude... And I never pretended to know it all. Hell, before today I thought only someone who had been traumatically raped would lug around a mattress for a year to make a statement about it. I just took the guy's guilt at face value. Turns out I may have been incorrect.

If avoiding publications like Jezebel 'keeps me in the dark', somebody please fit me for a blindfold."

Excuse me for interpreting this: "Bahahahahahahahaha thanks guys I hadn't been following this closely." as laughing at me.

I don't frequent Jezebel, but I genuinely wanted to hear more from Emma's point of view, so when I did a Google search that was the link that provided some much-needed perspective. Even the tabloids get it right once in a while.

Quaid · May 21, 2015

Ha, no man. I was laughing at the fact that it's entirely possible she's been carrying around a mattress for a year and it was all bullshit. If it's a crock of shit this Emma woman is a fucking artiste on the level of people like Miley Cyrus and Charlie Sheen.

I've come to have great respect for effective media/culture/fame manipulators. It's all so 20s jazz.

khalid · May 21, 2015

Tanoomba_sl said:
If anything, "girl is raped by friend, waits too long to act on it" is much more feasible than "girl accuses friend of extremely serious crime because he wouldn't go steady with her".

This might be true, if we only knew the accusation happened. Once you factor in all the text messages, it is quite clear the latter is far more likely.

Tanoomba_sl said:
Also, the mattress thing doesn't seem crazy at all to me, but I got my first degree at an art school.

So you have multiple degrees, yet know virtually nothing about science? What a disservice you have done to yourself.

Tanoomba · May 21, 2015

Lith: "Why do you believe this is impossible for women? Especially when we have examples of precisely this happening? Emotional and mental trauma, even if the sex was legal? Is very real, Tan. Please stop being a shitlord and marginalizing women's feelings who are hurt by abusive and exploitative (But not rapey) relationships."

Back to your dishonest ways again, Lith? Show me where I said that was impossible.

There are 2 possibilities here:
1) Emma was raped, tried to act normally after the fact, decided to act against her rapist when she discovered there were other victims, got frustrated when the college did the only thing they could do in the absence of evidence, and made a performance art piece to communicate her experience.
2) Emma had sex for the third time with a close friend (first for anal), for some reason he scorned her after this, for some reason she took this super-seriously but didn't take revenge until much later, got pissed when the college wouldn't punish him based on her false, evidence-free rape accusations, and decided to destroy his reputation anyway by carrying a mattress around campus every fucking day until her graduation.

Both are possible. What I've seen leads me to believe the first scenario is more likely, but I wouldn't put money on it, since if Zimmerman has taught me anything it's that the most likely scenario is not always what actually happened. Wish some of you guys would realize that.

khalid · May 21, 2015

Tanoomba_sl said:
if Zimmerman has taught me anything it's that the most likely scenario is not always what actually happened. Wish some of you guys would realize that.

It never gets old to me how you constantly use the fact you have been shown to be wrong over and over again as evidence of how openminded you are. Hint: It really shows you are just wrong all the time.

Mario Speedwagon · May 21, 2015

I like how whenever he brings up Zimmerman he says "the most likely scenario isn't always true" as if the most likely scenario there was a malevolent racist stalked a teenager through his neighborhood and murdered him in cold blood. I mean how can you blame him for being wrong? It was clearly the most likely scenario!

hodj · May 21, 2015

khalid_sl said:
So you have multiple degrees, yet know virtually nothing about science? What a disservice you have done to yourself.

Too much arts, not enough maths.

hodj · May 21, 2015

Tanoomba_sl said:
Both are possible. What I've seen leads me to believe the first scenario is more likely

You are a fucking idiot. Literally fucking retarded.

When even COLUMBIA UNIVERSITY'S TRIBUNAL DISAGREES WITH YOU YOU ARE FUCKING WRONG.

Tanoomba · May 21, 2015

Doc: "I like how whenever he brings up Zimmerman he says "the most likely scenario isn't always true" as if the most likely scenario there was a malevolent racist stalked a teenager through his neighborhood and murdered him in cold blood. I mean how can you blame him for being wrong? It was clearly the most likely scenario!"

lolwut

AngryGerbil · May 21, 2015

My third ever post directed at Tan, from last Spetember:

"Like I said, it wasn't a perfect analogy but hopefully you got my meaning. You clearly didn't get my meaning (That you are hurting your own cause by going too far. There is such a thing as too much of a good thing.). Fair enough I suppose. Whatever. I can let it go. I think most others know what I meant.)

Sarkeesian is to feminism what Sharpton is to racism. (that is: counterproductive)

They claim, on the surface, to be against these things. But their actions are of the MOST devious nature imaginable. They are both practicing soft bigotry. Soft bigotry trumps hard bigotry any day of the week and twice on Sundays precisely because it purports itself to be an agent for the very people it denigrates. It is, in a single word;.... insidious.

It is up to us, which includes you, to stop victimizing women and start empowering them. I know that that line is lost on you. I know it is. But maybe someday it will make sense. Maybe someday you will see that the worst decision any human can make, no matter what race or gender, is the decision to create a persona of victimhood for themselves. I don't know how to flip that switch directly in people. I just know that it will, eventually, gradually, and inevitably, be switched. I hope it happens for you sooner rather than later. You seem to have a good heart. You seem to be such a good soldier. I would love to have you on my side."

Tanoomba · May 21, 2015

As inapplicable now as it was then.

AngryGerbil · May 21, 2015

Tanoomba_sl said:
As inapplicable now as it was then.

"It is up to us, which includes you, to stop victimizing women and start empowering them. I know that that line is lost on you. I know it is"

Tanoomba · May 22, 2015

Yes, that's exactly the part I was talking about.

Tanoomba · May 22, 2015

Let me clarify. Take a look at these 3 interpretations of Emma's actions:

a) She didn't get the boy she wanted so she went into full vengeful bitch mode.
b) A boy had butt sex with her then was mean to her; She kept repeating "I was raped, I was raped" to herself until she genuinely believed it.
c) She knows damn well what happened to her and acted in a way typical of rape victims.

A and B are incredibly condescending and infantilizing. I find it interesting that Lith brought up looking at women the same way he looks at men, because "bitch be crazy" is the ultimate "We don't need to try to understand what happened, girls are sometimes irrational feels-beasts whose wild emotions wreak havoc on them and those around them, amirite guyz?" lazy conclusion card. I am the only one looking at her as though she were a man, which is to say: I am considering the possibility that she is completely in control of her faculties and has behaved in ways consistent with her version of the story. There is nothing "victimizing" about that.

Tanoomba · May 22, 2015

I know that explanation is lost on you. I know it is.

Lithose · May 22, 2015

Tanoomba_sl said:
A and B are incredibly condescending and infantilizing. I find it interesting that Lith brought up looking at women the same way he looks at men, because "bitch be crazy" is the ultimate "We don't need to try to understand what happened, girls are sometimes irrational feels-beasts whose wild emotions wreak havoc on them and those around them, amirite guyz?" lazy conclusion card. I am the only one looking at her as though she were a man, which is to say: I am considering the possibility that she is completely in control of her faculties and has behaved in ways consistent with her version of the story. There is nothing "victimizing" about that.

Because men can't lose control and be emotionally unstable? So the males who swallow guns or go on rage filled murder sprees, those guys are just happy-go-lucky dude bros who felt it was the right time of day to go-a-killing? Have you ever read these guys manifestos and see the completely distorted and twisted view of reality they have? Or even look at the witness statements from the Mike Brown incident, see all the men who got the general story right, but then twisted up the details. Or any number of incidents where it's two men's words against each other and both have radically different views of events.

There is nothing condescending and infantilizing about believing women have the same character flaws as men. But it's hilarious watching the hypocrisy in your position--Tan. But this is a new fun one. So man rapes, and it's easy to believe he can distort the events, and lie and cover it up to protect his savage sociopath tendency to harm women. So you easily believe, in THIS case, a man can distort the truth. Then you say that it's infantilizing to believe a woman would lie and distort the truth to harm a man---because reasons.

When your logic actually gets good enough to not contradict yourself in a single thought? Come crawl out of this hole and talk again. Otherwise I'll only come in here when I need cheap entertainment. Have fun, Tan.

Quaid · May 22, 2015

d) she accidentally pooped during the but sex and this is her plan to avoid that shameful story ever getting told.

The Tanoubliette: Pussy Hurt and Delusions or TTPHAD for short.

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