Trex vs etoilet cam vs aria analysis tits dicks punchability
- Thread starter kegkilla
- Start date
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Guest, it's time once again for the massively important and exciting FoH Asshat Tournament!
Go here and give us your nominations!Who's been the biggest Asshat in the last year? Give us your worst ones!
trex
Queen Bee
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I"d like to start by telling you all that this was all a joke. I didn"t think that I was going to get a single picture but I did. 3. If I sent my dick to a girl that was going to judge it and then she backed out and was all "I"m just pranxxxing" I would be pissed. So here it goes.
Length: This was hard to tell for sure because I"m not sure how big their hands are. It could look really big because they have freakishly small hand or vice versa. Also, I don"t personally like long dicks because it feels like they"re going to come out of your (my) mouth. #fuckinghatethat
--Cam: Definitely not short. I would say 7 inches is fair and I would also say that"s a perfect size. The length of the head out lengthed the length of the shaft in a not good way. So lets go with... 8.5/10
--Aria: I would never say this one was long. Again, I don"t think that"s a bad thing. The head to shaft proportions were very nice so.. 7/10
Girth: This explains itself, amirite? The bigger the better.
--Cam: Looks about like most I"ve seen. No more. No less. The way it goes in in the middle is really weird, it looks like there is a rubber band wrapped around it. Tyen and I couldn"t figure out what was going on there. Since the head is girthier than the shaft and I suppose that might feel nice, I think a 6/10 is fair.
--Aria: I"m not sure what else to say beside above average girth. Very nice. I"m sure his girlfriend is happy to sit on it. 8/10
Head Shape:
--Cam: Hm. The front is nicer than the back. The back has a very weird shape and I"m not really down. It"s also very shiny and I"m not really down with that either. Since it is so defined I would say 5/10 but he gets a pitty point for it being so big. 6/10.
--Aria: Very traditional. Could only see the front in the pic but it"s nice. Whatever doctor circumcised him did a fab job. 9/10, definitely.
Hair: This is all preference, but personally I can NOT STAND everything to be totally shaven. I have no idea who thought this was a good look for men, but it is not. Double bad if there is razor burn. I also don"t love au natural. Trimmed to be-- eh-- 1/4"" long would be a 10/10 in my book.
--Cam: A little long. (Just a tad). Luckily their are no weird scrotum hairs so I would give it a 9/10.
--Aria: Totes shaved and 3 razor burn bumps. NOT DOWN. Luckily for you, this is easily fixable, so I really don"t feel bad at all giving you a 3/10.
Scrotum/Testicles:
--Cam: Oh my heavens. I have never seen something like this. I think the only reasonable explanation is that you have very saggy balls and when you lie down the sag just kind of chills out. Not a good look. The testicles also look like little grapes, I really can"t even see them. I think a 2/10 is generous.
--Aria: Very nice. Tight, large looking, and clean. 8/10 just because I can"t really see them. If I could totes see them you definitely have the potential for 10/10. *claps*
Vasculature: This is also (maybe?) preference but I just went with my gut feeling about what was pleasing to my eye.
--Cam: Not great. It"s a very pink color and I can"t really see any veins (you might just have a crappy camera). I like some veins as long as they"re not too buldgy. I really don"t like the color (I prefer a closer to other skin tone color) so a 4/10 is fair.
--Aria: Very nice. Perfect veins (good color (purple not green), good length, good amount of bulging off the shaft). The color of your actual penis is also great. Pink head and your shaft is the same color as your hand (that is a very special gift you have). 10/10 no doubt.
Altogether Aria wins with an 8.5/10. I basically disregarded your hair situation in the final judgement because that is SO easily fixable (please fix it). Would need to be a bit longer and a lil girthier to get a 10.
Cam all together you get a 6/10. There is not that much wrong with the actual cock but the area around it needs some serious nip/tuck. Also, I"m a HUGE fan of testicles and you don"t really have visable ones so that took at least 1 pt off your final score.
and Lyrical never sent his cock, but you guys should give him nets for his muscular torso. Very nice. He ALMOST gets a participation ribbon.
And without further ado, here is Cams cock. (I obv wouldn"t post Aria"s because he didn"t give me the green light the way Cam did)
Spoiler Alert, click show to read:
EDIT: A special thanks goes to Drinsic who lovingly talked me into posting the pic above. I was tres nervous.
Length: This was hard to tell for sure because I"m not sure how big their hands are. It could look really big because they have freakishly small hand or vice versa. Also, I don"t personally like long dicks because it feels like they"re going to come out of your (my) mouth. #fuckinghatethat
--Cam: Definitely not short. I would say 7 inches is fair and I would also say that"s a perfect size. The length of the head out lengthed the length of the shaft in a not good way. So lets go with... 8.5/10
--Aria: I would never say this one was long. Again, I don"t think that"s a bad thing. The head to shaft proportions were very nice so.. 7/10
Girth: This explains itself, amirite? The bigger the better.
--Cam: Looks about like most I"ve seen. No more. No less. The way it goes in in the middle is really weird, it looks like there is a rubber band wrapped around it. Tyen and I couldn"t figure out what was going on there. Since the head is girthier than the shaft and I suppose that might feel nice, I think a 6/10 is fair.
--Aria: I"m not sure what else to say beside above average girth. Very nice. I"m sure his girlfriend is happy to sit on it. 8/10
Head Shape:
--Cam: Hm. The front is nicer than the back. The back has a very weird shape and I"m not really down. It"s also very shiny and I"m not really down with that either. Since it is so defined I would say 5/10 but he gets a pitty point for it being so big. 6/10.
--Aria: Very traditional. Could only see the front in the pic but it"s nice. Whatever doctor circumcised him did a fab job. 9/10, definitely.
Hair: This is all preference, but personally I can NOT STAND everything to be totally shaven. I have no idea who thought this was a good look for men, but it is not. Double bad if there is razor burn. I also don"t love au natural. Trimmed to be-- eh-- 1/4"" long would be a 10/10 in my book.
--Cam: A little long. (Just a tad). Luckily their are no weird scrotum hairs so I would give it a 9/10.
--Aria: Totes shaved and 3 razor burn bumps. NOT DOWN. Luckily for you, this is easily fixable, so I really don"t feel bad at all giving you a 3/10.
Scrotum/Testicles:
--Cam: Oh my heavens. I have never seen something like this. I think the only reasonable explanation is that you have very saggy balls and when you lie down the sag just kind of chills out. Not a good look. The testicles also look like little grapes, I really can"t even see them. I think a 2/10 is generous.
--Aria: Very nice. Tight, large looking, and clean. 8/10 just because I can"t really see them. If I could totes see them you definitely have the potential for 10/10. *claps*
Vasculature: This is also (maybe?) preference but I just went with my gut feeling about what was pleasing to my eye.
--Cam: Not great. It"s a very pink color and I can"t really see any veins (you might just have a crappy camera). I like some veins as long as they"re not too buldgy. I really don"t like the color (I prefer a closer to other skin tone color) so a 4/10 is fair.
--Aria: Very nice. Perfect veins (good color (purple not green), good length, good amount of bulging off the shaft). The color of your actual penis is also great. Pink head and your shaft is the same color as your hand (that is a very special gift you have). 10/10 no doubt.
Altogether Aria wins with an 8.5/10. I basically disregarded your hair situation in the final judgement because that is SO easily fixable (please fix it). Would need to be a bit longer and a lil girthier to get a 10.
Cam all together you get a 6/10. There is not that much wrong with the actual cock but the area around it needs some serious nip/tuck. Also, I"m a HUGE fan of testicles and you don"t really have visable ones so that took at least 1 pt off your final score.
and Lyrical never sent his cock, but you guys should give him nets for his muscular torso. Very nice. He ALMOST gets a participation ribbon.
And without further ado, here is Cams cock. (I obv wouldn"t post Aria"s because he didn"t give me the green light the way Cam did)
Spoiler Alert, click show to read:
EDIT: A special thanks goes to Drinsic who lovingly talked me into posting the pic above. I was tres nervous.
zombiewizardhawk
Potato del Grande
- 9,959
- 12,890
Camerous
Molten Core Raider
- 331
- 1,056
They look small cause the sac is so huge... they are actually the size of my thumb
Also when I click the spoiler above... there was no pic?
As for the rubber band thing that"s because I am uncircumcised and my shaft is bigger than my foreskin so it looks really tight... ripped it a couple times before... which is why the underside looks funny hehe... as for why my cock was shiny... I was getting a blow job in both instances so that is saliva.
Also when I click the spoiler above... there was no pic?
As for the rubber band thing that"s because I am uncircumcised and my shaft is bigger than my foreskin so it looks really tight... ripped it a couple times before... which is why the underside looks funny hehe... as for why my cock was shiny... I was getting a blow job in both instances so that is saliva.
Noodleface
A Mod Real Quick
- 38,308
- 15,165
I"m glad I won that contest for two reasons.
1) My weiner is better than yours
2) I questioned if the email I sent that to was actually Trex, or perhaps I was sending my dick to a kid. Russian Roulette on that one, today I was successful.
Might be weird to have pictures of my dick on my computer, but it"s for my fiancee and I don"t really care about it.. although didn"t know a man would be judging my perfect skin-tone, near-perfectly circumsized schlong.
1) My weiner is better than yours
2) I questioned if the email I sent that to was actually Trex, or perhaps I was sending my dick to a kid. Russian Roulette on that one, today I was successful.
Might be weird to have pictures of my dick on my computer, but it"s for my fiancee and I don"t really care about it.. although didn"t know a man would be judging my perfect skin-tone, near-perfectly circumsized schlong.