Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice (2016)

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Araysar

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j00t_sl said:
there was a superman comic that came out a few years back called "Superman Earth-2" or something. basically it was about a re-imagining of superman and the idea that he's pretty much perfect. there's a scene where he comes to metropolis for the first time to start his new life and applies to all these different positions. he goes to the football team and just destroys the team using his superpowers, but not overtly (not using super speed and letting himself get tackled). he's goes to some applied sciences corporation and solves their formula is like 15 seconds and a bunch of other places where he demonstrates to the reader that he literally is a super man in every respect. then he ends up choosing to work at the daily bugle because it's the only career where it makes sense for him to be around all these problems.

anyways, i remember reading it and thinking, THIS is why superman is awesome. he can literally do anything. the villian was some brand new douche bag alien who blew up krypton and wants to kill the last kryptonian. i remember reading it like 2 or 3 years ago and i kept thinking they needed to have a lot more stories with THIS superman. then i went and saw man of steel and i was like... this... this is literally page for page conceptually identical... except, there is absolutely no soul to this movie. hm.
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Daily Bugle you say...
 
Malakriss

Malakriss

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Lyrical_sl said:
From listening to that, it's apparent that Goyer's already made up his mind that Superman should win. What a dick. He says right there in the interview that the comic book purists would say Batman because of prep time, but that it makes no sense because Supes could flick him away.

If Superman wins, we riot!
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Well, it is Affleck, not like he has a chance of winning anything.
 
Araysar

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Ben Affleck as batman, fighting Superman.

Hahaha, this franchise is so ridiculous
 
F

fucker_sl

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Sutekh_sl said:
Then you should probably know that he's not actually that smart ...
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considering howi i took him 80 years to dump that dry vagina of Lois Lane and start pointing at more worthwhile females, i agree

he's banging Wonder Woman right now, so that's definitely an improvement
 
G

Grizzlebeard_sl

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fucker_sl said:
considering howi i took him 80 years to dump that dry vagina of Lois Lane and start pointing at more worthwhile females, i agree

he's banging Wonder Woman right now, so that's definitely an improvement
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See, I can so get my head around him banging Wonder Woman. The one issue I had with Supes and Lois was how he never blew a hole in her when he was banging her. There's some things you can control and some you can't and I don't see him being able to slow down his super jizz enough to not blow the top of her head off.
 
F

fucker_sl

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yep. Kents' house needed a lot of repairs during Superman teen years. Misterious holes in the walls appeared at least twice at day
 
Malakriss

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Superman never ate Mexican, because supershits were an Extinction Level Event. That's the argument people make with the super jizz.

Fortunately he never sneezed, burped, farted, or did any other bodily function throughout his entire adult life.
 
Shonuff

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Malakriss_sl said:
Superman never ate Mexican, because supershits were an Extinction Level Event. That's the argument people make with the super jizz.

Fortunately he never sneezed, burped, farted, or did any other bodily function throughout his entire adult life.
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He never farted because Batman had a Kryptonite-laced Bat Dildo up his ass.
 
Tarrant

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That was neither clever or funny.
frown.png
 
Void

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Grimmlokk_sl said:
Here is what happens when a hooker gets superpowers andblows "Superman"
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If any of you remember the leaked script for what the movie Hancock was originally intended to be, they kind of deal with it there too. The script had a terrible ending by the way, but I actually wouldn't mind a movie based off of the rest of it.

I don't have it anymore, but I'm sure it is out there somewhere still.
 
Lanx

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remember, superman is an alien, he's a good looking version of martian manhunter, he can't be saddled with a lois lane, he needs a wonder woman, who if i remember correctly is a demi-god made from/out of b/c of the earth? from gaia and zeus? i think currently they've given wonder-woman the pantheon of all the greek powers (i think she can even do lightning bolts somewhere), she's about the only thing as powerful as superman, and she doesn't have a superweakness like kyrptonite. in a sense only a goddess will do for superman.

but superman v batman? there is no way to even make that a compelling story without bringing down the power level of superman 100fold. batmans greatest strengths would be technology + smarts. Superman defeated a genetically perfect engineered general of doom(zod) backed up by super alien tech, heck the latest batman movie has him in a helicopter... superman was laying waste to a planet destroyer in the sky.

one of them will have to play dirty, or evil, that's why while flawed at least frank millers version has batman doing shit, "hey one armed green arrow, why don't we pay back kent!" there isn't a story here, because it will be shitty, there is too much goliath for david to overcome.
 
Araysar

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Maybe they can have Batman beat him in Chutes and Ladders for 2 hours
 
Grimmlokk

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Vvoid_sl said:
If any of you remember the leaked script for what the movie Hancock was originally intended to be, they kind of deal with it there too. The script had a terrible ending by the way, but I actually wouldn't mind a movie based off of the rest of it.

I don't have it anymore, but I'm sure it is out there somewhere still.
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Leaked script? It was a deleted scene. Jump to about 2:45 to skip him picking up the whore.

Hancock Deleted Scene - Mountain Top - Trailer Addict

It's an old ass joke/observation was my point initially. Every time someone mentions it with Superman they think they are being so clever, shit's been in multiple movies by now. "Hurr hurr super jizz!"
 
Tuco

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Grimmlokk_sl said:
Leaked script? It was a deleted scene. Jump to about 2:45 to skip him picking up the whore.

Hancock Deleted Scene - Mountain Top - Trailer Addict

It's an old ass joke/observation was my point initially. Every time someone mentions it with Superman they think they are being so clever, shit's been in multiple movies by now. "Hurr hurr super jizz!"
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I never watched hancock but always kinda wanted to. After that scene, lol. They try to go from super-jizz to soul-crushing rejection in three seconds. Like a woman wouldn't be excited by that anyway.
 
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