Career advice needed

The Edge · Mar 12, 2015

I'm having somewhat of an existential dilemma. I've pretty much gotten the jobs I thought I wanted to get, but with each one, I either end up hating it or feel like I'm just wasting my time. I would look at coworkers that had been at the job for 20+ years and I would think "there's no way I could do this for that long." The longest I've been at a job since grad school has been 2 years. Each time I go for a new position I think I'm "upgrading" and I go into it thinking "this is what I want", but then it ends not being that and I start the job search again shortly after starting. It's at the point that I have no idea what I want now, because what I thought I wanted isn't doing it for me. It's been letdown after letdown, so now I'm tentative to pursue any interest. I had a dream job that I worked hard to get, and within a month, I realized that it wasn't what I wanted to do for the rest of my life. Very disheartening.

I don't like hearing that "nobody likes their job" because that seems so pessimistic and I know it's not true. I've thought about pursuing other avenues within the same field, but out the ones that interest me, I've seen the lifestyle those people have, and it's not something I want to do (basically freelance work where they're always looking for the next gig, i.e. no job security).

I'm thinking I just need to do a 180 and go some totally different direction that doesn't use my degrees.

Couple things hold me back:

My bachelors and masters are in the same field. A field that I'm kind of over working in.
I need to be making north of $80k to maintain lifestyle.
I'm sick of school, and do not want to go back to pursue any more degrees. I already owe $60k from the first 2.
I have to live someplace that I love, otherwise the job isn't worth it. I live in southern California, about 45min from L.A. I've been to 43 states and this is my favorite location. I've also considered overseas locals such as Dubai, France, Germany and New Zealand.

Any ideas?

Corndog · Mar 12, 2015

The problem is you're trying to maintain a lifestyle. You can't be a farmer, and jet set around the world. You may love being a farmer, but it won't put out that kind of money. I own my own fish store, because it is what I wanted to do. I could easily make more money working for someone else running their business.

I'd bet if you looked at it enough you'd realize it was your lifestyle you didn't like. A job is the means to pay for what you like to do outside of work. I see a lot of people who maintain a lifestyle to keep a job. You need the luxury car, because your commute sucks, you need the retarded expensive house/rent because of the city you live in that pays you well.

Whats your dream? If you don't have one, that's your problem. My dream is to have a job that requires no physical location, that means I'd make the same money whether I'm in Seattle, or Africa, or Germany etc. The way I see this happening for me is owning my own business then leveraging that. Using that to start up an online business or real estate that can be managed by someone else.

Now, to make that dream happen, working for someone else would make it nearly impossible. I'd say most dreams can be done in different places, If you wanted to go camping every weekend, you could live in many states working a 30-40k job and you'd be "well off" etc.

The Edge · Mar 12, 2015

Corndog_sl said:
I'd bet if you looked at it enough you'd realize it was your lifestyle you didn't like. A job is the means to pay for what you like to do outside of work.

I really don't think it's the lifestyle that's the problem. I don't live extravagantly by any means. I'd be content to sit on my couch all day watching movies and playing video games.

If a job is just a means to do what you really like outside of work, then I feel like I should gear up for that job that pays $200k. I may hate it, but at least it let's me live in style and travel the world.

There has to be a better way. I don't think it's too much to ask for your job to be your passion and have it pay well too.

Corndog · Mar 13, 2015

If your goal is to travel a bunch, get a job that does that. I have two fellow fish friends who travel a bunch. One of them is a flight attendant. Flies anywhere he wants whenever he wants. Another one works for the bill and melinda gates foundation, always traveling doing humanitarian work.

Now both of these, when travel becomes free, the job itself wouldn't have to pay that much to have the "lifestyle".

Vinen · Mar 13, 2015

The Edge_sl said:
I'm having somewhat of an existential dilemma. I've pretty much gotten the jobs I thought I wanted to get, but with each one, I either end up hating it or feel like I'm just wasting my time. I would look at coworkers that had been at the job for 20+ years and I would think "there's no way I could do this for that long." The longest I've been at a job since grad school has been 2 years. Each time I go for a new position I think I'm "upgrading" and I go into it thinking "this is what I want", but then it ends not being that and I start the job search again shortly after starting. It's at the point that I have no idea what I want now, because what I thought I wanted isn't doing it for me. It's been letdown after letdown, so now I'm tentative to pursue any interest. I had a dream job that I worked hard to get, and within a month, I realized that it wasn't what I wanted to do for the rest of my life. Very disheartening.

I don't like hearing that "nobody likes their job" because that seems so pessimistic and I know it's not true. I've thought about pursuing other avenues within the same field, but out the ones that interest me, I've seen the lifestyle those people have, and it's not something I want to do (basically freelance work where they're always looking for the next gig, i.e. no job security).

I'm thinking I just need to do a 180 and go some totally different direction that doesn't use my degrees.

Couple things hold me back:

My bachelors and masters are in the same field. A field that I'm kind of over working in.
I need to be making north of $80k to maintain lifestyle.
I'm sick of school, and do not want to go back to pursue any more degrees. I already owe $60k from the first 2.
I have to live someplace that I love, otherwise the job isn't worth it. I live in southern California, about 45min from L.A. I've been to 43 states and this is my favorite location. I've also considered overseas locals such as Dubai, France, Germany and New Zealand.

Any ideas?

What is your degree?

Kedwyn · Mar 13, 2015

What have these jobs been and what is your degree in? Can't help you without any information.

The Edge · Mar 13, 2015

Bachelor's in music and Master's in conducting.

I've taught all age groups up through college. I've conducted musicals, recorded soundtracks, composed, and been a guest conductor for various groups.

I really don't want to teach ever again. Hours are bad and the pay isn't good enough to justify the energy and time it takes. And at the end of the day, I don't like it.

The musical route was fun for awhile, but those things aren't stationary unless you're on Broadway, and I don't want to live on the road and in hotels.

Being a guest conductor or composer is fun, but the work isn't consistent. Most guys that do this teach and do this as their side job/hobby.

Tortfeasor · Mar 13, 2015

Write music and sell it/put it on youtube.

McCheese · Mar 13, 2015

There has to be a better way. I don't think it's too much to ask for your job to be your passion and have it pay well too.

I think that IS too much to ask. You can have a job you're passionate about, or you can have a job that pays really well. I think it's pretty rare when those two things collide, although it isn't unheard of. What are you passionate about? Start there and then find a way to turn that into a job that pays you enough money to maintain your lifestyle. Depending on your passion, this could be pretty easy or incredibly hard.

From what you've posted so far, it seems like your passion is making money.

Joeboo · Mar 13, 2015

Its kinda like the old adage about women: Hot/Smart/Sane - pick 2.

Jobs are the same:

One of the more realistic ways to reach that middle area is to be your own boss(like Corndog). That's definitely not without risks though.

It sounds like you want a fun job, that pays well, leaves you with a lot of free time, and is stable/low risk. Good luck with that.

I'm firmly in that "booooring" category. My job is close, it's easy, pays well enough, but I have no personal interest in it whatsoever. Boring as hell. Thats why I spend all day posting here. I kinda subscribe to the theory that you get paid to go to a job because no one would do it for free. There's a reason it's not "fun". My job isn't soul-sucking or anything, I don't work long hours, my co-workers are nice enough, so I'm good with it. I don't dread getting up in the morning and going to work, and I make enough money to enjoy my time away from work just fine, so I'm good. Yeah, i'm not traveling the world all the time in a personal jet and buying Bentlys, but I dont have any desire to do that. That wouldn't make me any happier than I am now in my life.

Noodleface · Mar 13, 2015

The Venn diagram holds true for me.. long commute :|

Soygen · Mar 13, 2015

joeboo_sl said:
It sounds like you want a fun job, that pays well, leaves you with a lot of free time, and is stable/low risk. Good luck with that.

Exactly.

I'm also in the boooring category. I'm working to live and have a plan in place for a relative early retirement. I'm almost 40 and definitely have no desire to go back to school and try and secure a job I'm passionate about. I'm ok with making decent money and only having a 20 minute drive to work every day.

ZyyzYzzy · Mar 13, 2015

Dude plays/teaches music and makes 80k. Sounds like a fucking nice easy gig.

Soygen · Mar 13, 2015

ZyyzYzzy_sl said:
Dude plays/teaches music and makes 80k. Sounds like a fucking nice easy gig.

Yeah, that sounds like a great salary in a field that is usually populated with people who are passionate about it. I can't even imagine getting a masters in that field and then just "not being into it".

The Edge · Mar 13, 2015

Teaching at a university pays well. Also, being in California helps. I started making $15k more a year just by changing states and essentially keeping the same job. My current job caps at $96k after 20 years. I'm just over the teaching aspect. Doesn't do it for me anymore. On paper these jobs look very interesting to me, but when I get there it's like having the curtain pulled open in the Wizard of Oz and it's like "oh, that's what this job is like."

I have actually been tossing around the idea of starting my own business. My dad is friends with guy that pitches ideas to investors and gets stuff started all the time. I'm just worried that this will be another thing I'm excited for now, but after putting in the hard work and attaining it, I'll realize it's not what I want.

And ya, I currently dread going into my current job.

Khane · Mar 13, 2015

Sounds like he's just in a rut. Might not be due to his job either but that's the easiest thing to blame.

McCheese · Mar 13, 2015

The Edge_sl said:
Teaching at a university pays well. Also, being in California helps. I started making $15k more a year just by changing states and essentially keeping the same job. My current job caps at $96k after 20 years. I'm just over the teaching aspect. Doesn't do it for me anymore. On paper these jobs look very interesting to me, but when I get there it's like having the curtain pulled open in the Wizard of Oz and it's like "oh, that's what this job is like."

I have actually been tossing around the idea of starting my own business. My dad is friends with guy that pitches ideas to investors and gets stuff started all the time. I'm just worried that this will be another thing I'm excited for now, but after putting in the hard work and attaining it, I'll realize it's not what I want.

And ya, I currently dread going into my current job.

Sounds like your biggest problem is you don't really know what you want to do. You keep trying stuff that you think you'll like, but it ends up not being enjoyable. What do you enjoy? What would you do even if no one paid you to do it?

Rather than doing a complete job switch, you might be better off dabbling in some stuff part-time to see if you really do enjoy it.

Cad · Mar 13, 2015

The Edge_sl said:
Teaching at a university pays well. Also, being in California helps. I started making $15k more a year just by changing states and essentially keeping the same job. My current job caps at $96k after 20 years. I'm just over the teaching aspect. Doesn't do it for me anymore. On paper these jobs look very interesting to me, but when I get there it's like having the curtain pulled open in the Wizard of Oz and it's like "oh, that's what this job is like."

I have actually been tossing around the idea of starting my own business. My dad is friends with guy that pitches ideas to investors and gets stuff started all the time. I'm just worried that this will be another thing I'm excited for now, but after putting in the hard work and attaining it, I'll realize it's not what I want.

And ya, I currently dread going into my current job.

For the most part, jobs are jobs. They're all kinda routine mundane work to a certain degree. I don't know of anybody in real life who wakes up and is like HOLY FUCK I CANT WAIT TO GO TO WORK MY DICK WILL NOT RELAX UNTIL I SEE THESE BUDGET SPREADSHEETS!! HEEE HEEE!

But the ability to focus on your work despite that and do a good job to enable the rest of your life is a key thing for success. Suck. It. Up.

Deathwing · Mar 13, 2015

McCheese_sl said:
From what you've posted so far, it seems like your passion is making money.

The Edge is like the last person I'd assume that. Reading this thread, I've had to make sure this was the same guy that heavily posts new age hippy Eastern shit. I mean, I guess they're not mutually exclusive, but I don't usually associate people that are money driven with that stereotype.

joeboo_sl said:
Its kinda like the old adage about women: Hot/Smart/Sane - pick 2.

Jobs are the same:

One of the more realistic ways to reach that middle area is to be your own boss(like Corndog). That's definitely not without risks though.

It sounds like you want a fun job, that pays well, leaves you with a lot of free time, and is stable/low risk. Good luck with that.

I'm firmly in that "booooring" category. My job is close, it's easy, pays well enough, but I have no personal interest in it whatsoever. Boring as hell. Thats why I spend all day posting here. I kinda subscribe to the theory that you get paid to go to a job because no one would do it for free. There's a reason it's not "fun". My job isn't soul-sucking or anything, I don't work long hours, my co-workers are nice enough, so I'm good with it. I don't dread getting up in the morning and going to work, and I make enough money to enjoy my time away from work just fine, so I'm good. Yeah, i'm not traveling the world all the time in a personal jet and buying Bentlys, but I dont have any desire to do that. That wouldn't make me any happier than I am now in my life.

Chart was accurate/funny/depressing, thanks for that.

I definitely agree with the "work to make money" mentality. I enjoy coding and testing well enough but it's not my passion. I've often wondered if that's lowered the ceiling on my career. Even if that's true, I'm not sure if that's fixable or should be attempted. Really hard to make someone passionate about something.

Soygen · Mar 13, 2015

I'm passionate about playing video games and drinking beer. That pays shit, though.

Career advice needed

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