Early in our relationship, when i had some idea of wanting the marry the girl, I said to her 'don't expect a proposal any time soon, but please go through the internet and save 100 images of engagement rings you like in a folder on my desktop'. I was able to extrapolate quite easily from that. We got engaged 1.5years later & she loved the ring I chose.
I learned my lesson when I was young and dumb and bought various jewelry for various girlfriends. Most of the time they never wore it because they didn't really like it. Earrings, necklaces, bracelets, whatever. When I got with my wife I absolutely had her pick out the ring. I didn't give her an exact budget to stick to, but I went shopping with her enough to figure out her style, and most importantly what styles she HATED (cathedral settings, princess-cut diamonds, etc), so I knew exactly what kind of setting and shape of diamond she wanted. At that point all I had to do was decide my budget and find the best diamond that fit it.
This was my thought process when I reasoned out how much to spend on my wife's ring. It makes me shake my head a little when I see a guy buy a $500 ring when his gaming equipment is 2x (or more) expensive. What message does this send? I realize other relationships have far more depth than what outsiders see, but I decided for ME (not her), I would be more comfortable at least achieving parity between my gaming hardware (that I'll throw away in a few years) and a ring that may be passed down through multiple generations.
Of course they are a fucking scam. It isn't the "diamond" that your chick is lusting after, it's the status symbol that "my man can afford a 30,000 dollar ring" brings. Sure, a car or something else has far more use, but it's far less visible. Especially when at the office, out at the mall, at the amusement park, etc.
Well, it had to change, because society changed. Being bigger, stronger, faster, etc. isn't very valuable anymore, now that we've shed that whole "hunter/gatherer" phase. Naturally, women being the gatekeepers to sex, found others ways to show that they are "provided" for.
If you don't think an attractive woman has about a million more "options" for suitors than an equally attractive male, I don't know what to tell you. Sure, both will probably get laid/find a mate, but to act like men have just as much control over the "buy/sell" mechanic of sex? You're being completely dishonest with yourself.
I'm not trying to be antagonistic with this question, how old are you? I could see a young broke 20 year old being pissed off that it seems like the hot chicks run the show. This dynamic changes as men learn to be confident and acquire assets/wealth. I am going to guess that any well-paid in-shape 40+ year old men on this forum would agree that the ball is strongly in their court for dating... maybe even 30+.
This is insane. Maybe when you were fucking 18-25. Beyond that, men have so many more options disproportionately to women it's a joke (and that grows exponentially the older you get). Add the power of 10 to that if you're a real man and make a lot of money. Sure, it's easier for a woman to get laid than a man - and that probably never changes - but to find a mate/partner?
I'm 29 and married. I even conceded the point that an equally attractive male will have options also(replace attractive with anything else. Fun, cool, wealthy, etc.). However, you simply aren't being realistic if you think that a comparatively equal woman doesn't havemoreoptions. Women are sex sellers, men are sex buyers. I'm not talking about prostitution(in case you had that impression), I'm referring to how the dynamic surrounding sex between male/female works. It's always been this way, likely always will(baring some catastrophic shift in population ratios).
Right, you're comparing a 35-40 year old, wealthy, attractive male to a female of the same age. Of course the playing field shifts. However, give me a moderately successful female, attractive, not crazy, in the 25-30 range(face it, none of them under 25 are non-crazy)?
TL;DR I'm an old lecher who was going after women I had no shot and struck out constantly with until some dumb "hot" chick who wanted an older man so she could feel mature said yes.
This is the key issue here, and it IS accurate. But what cracks me up is all the men in the bottom 75 percent complaining about the gatekeepin' hoes when they're not nearly as attractive and fun to be around as they think, which leads to inflated and unrealistic standards. Sure; you can't fix your fucked up mug -- but a man with fun hobbies, an athletic build, and a decent tan ought to crush any social environment. Key takeaway: this guy isn't going out obviously trying to get laid -- hes so accustomed to sex just being a part of his life that he doesn't ooze desperation like all of you living your own self-fulfilling prophecy of "men have to try harder".
If you're a man and you're single into your 40's & 50's (even 30's) and you don't have women throwing themselves at you, you need to get another fucking job. I have plenty of pud friends making barely 6 figures who can't keep crazy bitches away, and they aren't great looking guys by any means.
"barely 6 figures" is more than almost 80% of the country'shouseholdincome. Of course it's easier to get laid when you're making more money. Any other hot tips to share?!
