Folger's Extravagant Swatch Thread

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Asshat Foler

2024 FoH Asshat
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It’s finally happening right Kirun Kirun ? She’ll be governor in two weeks right? Forum simps will rejoice as they preach “Lake 2024!”

 
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Woke up before today's session and tamped a gauze strip in the right side of my trachea. It was raw. Another day, another audit. Went down to the windowless room and Tom of course was already there, "Morning!" he said. "Right back at ya," I replied.

He nodded at the e-paddles and I picked them up, and then he went into deep focus on the meter, tweaking the knobs. He was high, as usual. But of course, "No he isn't," I was firmly told by everyone, blood draining from their face at the thought.

"Today, I ask the questions. You had some bad Thetan shit there with your 'comedian at a mathematics convention,' and it leads nowhere..."

"Well, strictly speaking," I interrupted.

I woke up 2 hours later in an operating room with a surgeon trying to remove Tom's pinky and thumb from the back of my right eye socket without severing the optic nerve. The eye was laying flat on my cheek and all I could see was my belt, the other eye was fixed on the doctor.

It was Kirstie Alley.
 
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Furry

🌭🍔🇺🇦✌️SLAVA UKRAINI!✌️🇺🇦🍔🌭
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Nirgon Nirgon would you poop in her butt?

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"Scientologists do not take prisoners, eh Mr. Saavik?" Kirstie winced and Tom said fuck you, snipped his fingers together, and goodbye right eye. "Fine Tom, you clean it up and you close," Kirstie said leaving the room." She has weight on Freewinds, and even Tom kind of has to watch his step.

He picked up my eye and put in his pocket and as he left the room said, "You see the dilemma don't you?"
 
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DickTrickle

Definitely NOT Furor Planedefiler
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"Scientologists do not take prisoners, eh Mr. Saavik?" Kirstie winced and Tom said fuck you, snipped his fingers together, and goodbye right eye. "Fine Tom, you clean it up and you close," Kirstie said leaving the room." She has weight on Freewinds, and even Tom kind of has to watch his step.

He picked up my eye and put in his pocket and as he left the room said, "You see the dilemma don't you?"
Good work Sadre, you made Nirgon react with a WTF. True excellence indeed.
 
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Asshat Foler

2024 FoH Asshat
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HOLY FUCKING SHIT ITS HAPPENING TRUST THE PLAN AND STAND READY YOU GIANT FAGGOT BEAGLES

 
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Down in the bowels of the Freewind, several dozen precogs dictated how things get run, and even Tom didn't like to go down there. Yes, I knew the dilemma. My dilemma. I had obviously pissed in one of their neural baths, and yes, I get it: this is why they are in these pools, isolated, barely any blood-brain barrier to speak of, driven mad by their own precognitions. That's the price you pay for a precog: lots of raw anger. Only the biggest idiot in the world messes with a precog's neural bath.

Tom's dilemma was, he had to put me in here or else the precogs were wrong. But the fact I am here, and let's be honest, is because I know they are.

Tom suggested sending me to Colorado for a free weed vacation. That would have worked.

But the precogs -- all named Heather, strangely enough -- shiver in their canopied neural pools. And the Winter closin' in.
 
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Woke last night to Days of Thunder
Tom had left it on before he wandered
Down to the pools to talk to precog number 2
Kirstie Alley's weakness, was always food
We all knew she had so much to loose

Workin on my shaw moves
Trying to get some in Foler's last ditch saloon
Workin and practicin', on my shaw moves.
Hmm-mmm
 
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