Girls who broke your heart thread
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Guest, it's time once again for the massively important and exciting FoH Asshat Tournament!
Go here and give us your nominations!Who's been the biggest Asshat in the last year? Give us your worst ones!
Wow thanks, I totally missed that thread"s return and got to re-enjoy the original hilarity.adebisi said:
Edit: Fuck no, I got to some pictures I did not want to see. I rescind my thank you.
Eomer
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I"m not the hopeless romantic type, but at some point it"s fairly likely that you"ll meet someone that changes how you feel about that kind of thing. Might take a couple years, might not be until you"re 60, might not ever happen. But the odds of any of those things are significantly affected by how you approach things. If you"re fine feeling that way, great, act accordingly. If not, then give some thought to what you can do about it.Brad2770 said:
I"ll forever remember your "I don"t like to get cancelled on, so there won"t be another time" or however you worded it to her when she cancelled your first date. Pretty sure your balls grew an inch in diameter after that.Tarrant220 said:
Hell, so after my last relationship I made some life changes and am going back to school. I"m 26 (27 in November) in classes with 18-22 year olds and I hate partying. I"m taking enough units that school is going to be basically where I spend most of my time.
Help.
Help.
what do you need help with?
you hate partying: do not go to partys
you are almost 27: dont date 18-22 year olds
you spend most of your time at school: people your age spend most of their time at work and generally do not date within the office
pick up an out of school hobby, classes at lowes or home depot will be great for your age group
you hate partying: do not go to partys
you are almost 27: dont date 18-22 year olds
you spend most of your time at school: people your age spend most of their time at work and generally do not date within the office
pick up an out of school hobby, classes at lowes or home depot will be great for your age group
Tarrant
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LoL we actually talked about that the other day.Dabamf said:
She was sick and yeah canceled like 2 hours before we were to meet up the first time. I texted her back saying if she was really sick it"s cool, but I don"t like being ditched so if"s that the case she could forget about it.
She says that is one of the most memorable things from when we first started talking.
Little does she know I was shitting a brick the whole time I texted that out and awaited her response.
Again, it"s crazy how far I"ve come and am still progressing. I honestly wouldn"t change a thing.
I"ve read the books, even the parts we"re not covering, for all my classes. I"m roughly three weeks ahead on my homework. I never went to college before so these are just general ed credits, I just need to prove I know stuff that I"ve known for years. Maybe in a couple of years when I get to new stuff it"ll require some focus, but not so much right now. And honestly part of what I"m looking for is getting better at socializing and talking to girls so I don"t repeat certain mistakes, that probably has more educational value then any of the classes I"m taking.adebisi said:
Just not sure how to meet people, I"m a total introvert. The Lowe"s classes might actually work. Funny thing about the town I live in, it is so expensive to live here that almost everyone is old and retired or a student, the people my age are a real minority.
Forgot about this. Need more info. Are you in Korea? In the states? Were the girls born in Korea and moved? What age? All that stuff matters a lot.Zeitgeist said:
Also, if it"s in the states, where is this bastion of Korean women so I can move there when I return to the states?
Converse with everyone. In class, ask the person next to you a question about your homework, even if you know the answer. If their answer is minimal or reluctant, they"re sorta awkward themselves anyway (lots of that in college) and just talk to someone else instead. You can judge their openness to talk to you right away by their body language. But don"t force conversation; speak casually. If you end up sitting next to and speaking to the same person twice, start saying hello to them. Pretty simple basic stuff.Aulirophile said:
Start saying hi and how are you to any service person you meet, even to the mutants at the walmart checkout. Just make that a rule for yourself now. That"s the easiest one. The only way to get comfortable socially is to force yourself. You"ll do and say awkward things here and there and be embarrassed, but over time you develop the necessary skills. Like everything in life, sociability can be learned and improved with practice. It"s not a magic pill, but it made me approximately 13434159194 times better at interacting with people compared to my awkward high school and college years.
Are there people who don"t do this?Dabamf said:
I"ve never really paid attention. That is standard etiquette by the standards I was raised by....Talk to people in class. Right. "Force myself" is definitely the right phrasing.
ToeMissile
Pronouns: zie/zhem/zer
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I"m in a somewhat similar situation and Dabamf is right. In a class/school situation it"s pretty damn easy to talk to anyone. "Hey, I"m *insert name*, How are you liking this class/professor/this school so far? What"s your major? What do you want to do with it? *insert comment about recent/upcoming assignment/exam*. I assuming there"s some kind of interaction during the class period depending on the class? Or before the class starts while waiting in the hallway/in your seats, college is the easiest place to start talking with anyone.Aulirophile said:Are there people who don"t do this?
Talk to people in class. Right. "Force myself" is definitely the right phrasing.
I understand where you"re coming from though. I"m in my 3rd semester toward my BSME, and just turned 30 in June. I was always quiet/introvert/shy, had a hard time initiating conversations/meeting people. Basically, I just got tired of it and decided to just say "hello" to who ever happened to be sitting next to. Or after some sort of group work w/ someone that seemed pretty cool and not a moron, throw out a "hey, what was your name again? I"m so and so, take it easy/see ya *next class period*. And then when the next class comes along, make sure to say hi. The majority of the people in your classes may be young, but it doesn"t mean they"re all complete jackasses. I"ve made a couple pretty good friends that I keep in touch with even though we aren"t in classes together any more. And even if you don"t, it makes the semester a lot more enjoyable to have someone to shoot the shit with.
As far as being bored academically for the time being, go to your department office and see what you can volunteer for. I"ve done a few little "events" and had the opportunity to meet other students who are farther along in the program, or people from companies I"d be interested in getting a job with once I graduate. Not to mention getting to know professors/administrators that you"ll be dealing with more as you get closer to completing your degree.
Do something, Learn something, Share something, Change something - Meetupis good for finding a group to do pretty much anything with.
There are no magic solutions. Practice is pretty much the answer to everything in life. The best way to get comfortable meeting people is to meet people. If you don"t exercise and decide you want to run a 6 minute mile, your first run will totally suck. But you power your way through it and eventually you start improving, and it doesn"t suck so much. Eventually you may come to enjoy it (I do) and, with enough practice, reach your goal.Aulirophile said:
If you open your mind about it, you"ll be surprised by the things you end up liking. I used to think most people are morons, and that"s probably still true, but I remember reading a quote by someone years ago that said something like "everyone is my superior in some form," ie everyone is better than you at something, so everyone can be learned from. That made me more open to meet people. And that line is true.
Brad2770
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So, I was reluctant to post this here, but I figure I am due for some "I told you so"s"...
I called my ex today to tell her I wanted my son on Thurs. She told me that I could get him Weds. or Fri. (I chose Fri.), but that his first T-Ball practice was on Thurs. I said "That"s great! Where at?"
"Oh, it"s in [city]. I"ll let [my son] know you will be seeing him on Fri."
"Uh, I"ll be seeing him Thurs. too."
"Well, I have a CPR class I will be attending and We already have plans for [her husband] to be taking him. It"s just a practice, you won"t be missing anything. My dad isn"t going and I can"t be there either."
"So fucking what! I want to be there and I will be there"
Basically, it ended with her saying that she will think about it, but most likely not because she doesn"t think I should be there with her new husband without her there. I informed her that I would not be sitting with the chump, that i will be either watching my son or helping him, but that I would be tending my own business.
It means a lot to me that I am there for him. One of the promises I made to him when he was a baby. I already failed at one - "Not keeping his family together" - I will not fail on another one.
Not sure why this took the cake, but it has finally been revealed that she cannot be trusted. I know you guys told me, but even with all that happened, I really wanted to trust what she had said. I wanted to believe that she would be a good person to me at least for my son and not use me, because I would not use her. I had always told her the truth about everything. She knew all of my intentions and how I felt about everything. I really and truly wanted to make things work again and I wasn"t going to rebuild on lies... She took advantage of my trust and generosity.
I checked my divorce decree and it said nothing about events like this- Like if she is obligated to tell me. Cad, if you could PM me, I would like to speak to you. As soon as I secure work, I will be taking her to court. I will be finding out what my full rights are. I will be setting myself up on child support.
For fuck"s sake, it"s just a baseball practice. I could easily be the one to take him and surely deserve to be the one to take him.
I called my ex today to tell her I wanted my son on Thurs. She told me that I could get him Weds. or Fri. (I chose Fri.), but that his first T-Ball practice was on Thurs. I said "That"s great! Where at?"
"Oh, it"s in [city]. I"ll let [my son] know you will be seeing him on Fri."
"Uh, I"ll be seeing him Thurs. too."
"Well, I have a CPR class I will be attending and We already have plans for [her husband] to be taking him. It"s just a practice, you won"t be missing anything. My dad isn"t going and I can"t be there either."
"So fucking what! I want to be there and I will be there"
Basically, it ended with her saying that she will think about it, but most likely not because she doesn"t think I should be there with her new husband without her there. I informed her that I would not be sitting with the chump, that i will be either watching my son or helping him, but that I would be tending my own business.
It means a lot to me that I am there for him. One of the promises I made to him when he was a baby. I already failed at one - "Not keeping his family together" - I will not fail on another one.
Not sure why this took the cake, but it has finally been revealed that she cannot be trusted. I know you guys told me, but even with all that happened, I really wanted to trust what she had said. I wanted to believe that she would be a good person to me at least for my son and not use me, because I would not use her. I had always told her the truth about everything. She knew all of my intentions and how I felt about everything. I really and truly wanted to make things work again and I wasn"t going to rebuild on lies... She took advantage of my trust and generosity.
I checked my divorce decree and it said nothing about events like this- Like if she is obligated to tell me. Cad, if you could PM me, I would like to speak to you. As soon as I secure work, I will be taking her to court. I will be finding out what my full rights are. I will be setting myself up on child support.
For fuck"s sake, it"s just a baseball practice. I could easily be the one to take him and surely deserve to be the one to take him.
Zehnpai
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See if your school has a student tutoring program. Introduce you to new people fairly regularly, teach you how to form connections with people on a 1 on 1 level. You probably won"t meet your intellectual equal this way but it"s good practice. Teaching is the antithesis of intoversion at the very least and you never know. A girl might invite you out for a beer and she may have a smarter, cuter friend.Aulirophile said:
If you want a real trial by fire though join a theater group. As an extrovert myself that was like...heaven. ~Especially~ if you can find one that does improv and the like. I"m talking improv like "Whose Line" and not interpretive dance improv that is. I get to entertain people, make them laugh and smile, all attention is focused on me and I get to showcase my talent and quick wit? God, just the thought of it gives me wood.
Jx3
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I"m in the same boat. Just went back to school and I"m 27. As far as being awkward around people? Nah, be a retard so what. I"ve found if I do what I want (within normal bounds ex. No dancing naked in the hall) people think I know something they dont and want to hang out.
Worst case scenario they think your weird and hate you. Fuck em, your going to school to get some education, not impress a bunch of shit ass 18 year olds.
Worst case scenario they think your weird and hate you. Fuck em, your going to school to get some education, not impress a bunch of shit ass 18 year olds.