Girls who broke your heart thread

MrGraham said:

Not having kids is becoming more and more of "the norm" among the educated mid to upper class this board probably primarily represents. Among my friends (largely IT workers, men and women), all of whom are 25+, having children is by far the minority.

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Pretty much. Anyone who is on the whole "if you"re 30 and single" march is (surprise) not paying attention to current events/facts/just a suscriber to "convenient theories for you" monthly.

Census and other surveys are showing that people (men and women) are waiting later and later to get married. There are a lot of reasons for this; for the last 5 years the economy and the fact that a lot of 25 year olds are still living at home has contributed significantly. The fact that women are reaching (and exceeding) men in terms of percentages that are attaining a college degree has contributed over the last decade or so.

More couples are also choosing not to get married (shit when we got our tax bill this year and realized that we paid less taxes living together unmarried we both had fleeting thoughts of a quickie divorce - but there are other financial/estate benefits that outweigh higher taxes plus we"d never be able to tell our families having only been married since Oct 2010), more couples are choosing to be DINK"s. Anyone toting the whole jack and diane we got married at 20 and that"s how "real amuricans/real amurican families/stable relationships" ought to work is just plain crazy. That"s the overwhelming minority of relationships - though it is a majority situation where one or both of the parties has not participated in higher education.

40 is the new 30. That"s what happens when the country gets educated and the average lifespan of a person gets longer.

Dabamf said:

More online shit.

This is a message I got from the married & divorced spam I sent out a few days ago. It"s a trick somehow. I"ve had more than one girl that was quite pushy from first contact about meeting. Tell me, more experienced internet people, what is going on? BTW her picture is a top-down with semi cleavage showing, which NO korean girls show in public.

P.S. I"m supposed to go out with some other girl I met on there this coming Sunday. She has been SUPER pushy about meeting, and I think she"s a bit crazy. I"m down for some excitement (dying) so fuck it.

I also talked to someone w/o a pic for like an hour yesterday. I tried to ignore her due to no pic but it turns out she was pretty hilarious and fun to talk to. After like an hour I said I need to see a pic to make sure she"s not a 50 year old man who"s gonna rape and kill me, and after some back-and-forth about why it was important to see a photo, she had a total meltdown that I was a terrible person for insisting on a photo.

Good times. I"ve also found a lot of girls just wanna practice English. I gotta work on screening those out better and somehow figure out which type are down to have fun and bone.

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Just fucking go, and take pics, and relay the stories. You aren"t going to be axe murdered, but if you are we have internet sleuths here and they will find out using a combination of the deep web and google translate. We will then add you to the screenshots banner/construct a shrine for you explaining the real perils of internet dating.

Get your 30 dollars worth. For honest, I think you aren"t gonna get shit for legit advice about KOREAN internet dating. That shit is way above our pay grade here.

I seriously don"t understand people who can say at 20 : "Let"s get married and have a baby!".

First of all, at 20, you have basically NO "serious relationship" experience NOR a good enough experience of life in general.

So, you just stopped being a fucking kid yourself, you don"t have a good degree, you have no financial stability, no career yet, and you want to get married and have a baby? Really?

Add to that the fact that there is a high probability that in 5 years you"ll just regret throwing your early-twenties out of the window...Because yes, you will miss these 5 years of growing, experimenting, learning about life, relationships, commitments...

So, why this need to rush into things?

It"s not like it"s hard to wait to be 30+, just to be sure you"re commited to the right person (pro-tip : your high-school sweetie RARELY ends up being the right person for you 10 years down the road), and that you have enough financial stability to raise a child properly.

But, eh, if you want to raise your child while working at minimum wage and to inflict him a painful divorce down the road because you finaly realized that it was dumb to marry his mother when you were 20, go ahead, do it.

So because of biological instinct, all women who are single and childless at 30 have massive baggage and/or are psycho hose beasts. Got it.

TheCutlery said:

And yet the biological clock keeps ticking. Here, lemme help you out with this one. 40 is the age where women seeking to have children have to go thru a ridiculous amount of extra shit in order to do so. That"s why most women in their early 30"s start to go fucking crazy if they haven"t had kids yet, it has exactly fuck and all to do with societal norms and everything to do with the most basic biological drive of EVERY SINGLE ORGANISM ON THIS PLANET.

Look around. 30 is the age where even the most die hard "I want to wait until my life is perfect to start a family" women start getting a little concerned that they haven"t found Mr. Right yet, because they know that if they"re not done having kids by 35, they"re in for a whole new world of extra tests and effort in order to make sure they have healthy babies. If it hasn"t started yet for all your friends, it will. Trying to avoid basic animal instinct is always going to be a losing proposition, and as much as we like to think we"re not animals, we are.

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So....how do you rationalize this theory with the mismatch in sexual peaks between men and women?

And if you"re using biology to explain societal norms/why society is the way it is, please also provide an explanation as to why marriage exists in the first place given that males are wired to spread seed, not commit to one woman. Because surely, someone who said something like "we"re all animals" cannot be the same person who thinks that marriage is the bestest thing ever because monogamy is 100% against animal instinct in humans" closest relatives.

(Incoming ad hominem laced diatribe because you have no rationally defensible position so the only thing you can do is launch a personal attack or deny that you aren"t the resident "marriage is awesome and I"m so much better than you because I"m married" cheerleader in this thread - both options equally hilarious - thanks for walking RIGHT into that for me so quickly - I truly thought it would take a couple of posts to get something out of you that would paint you into such a corner).

Etoille said:

And if you"re using biology to explain societal norms/why society is the way it is, please also provide an explanation as to why marriage exists in the first place given that males are wired to spread seed, not commit to one woman. Because surely, someone who said something like "we"re all animals" cannot be the same person who thinks that marriage is the bestest thing ever because monogamy is 100% against animal instinct in humans" closest relatives.

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Marriage, and monogamy in general, was an evolutionary response from women towards the male"s tendency to want to sleep with as many women as possible. Through monogamy the female gained a safety net, the family, which camewith a nifty little evolutionary advantage -- social stability. Children raised in stable families (not necessarily true today) were much more likely to survive to pass on their genes, thus the institution stuck around.

That"s not to imply that the male had nothing to gain from marriage -- quite the opposite, as a male that had acquired a female that he found highly desirable now had a socially accepted shield to protect her from other males looking to poach.

So on the surface it might seem as if monogamy runs counter to human evolution, but in actuality it"s a sophisticated social product of it.