Girls who broke your heart thread

lost said:

Cant wait to see that emotional train wreck. For your sake I hope her head is in the right place.

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I don"t think it"sherhead being in the wrong place he"s worried about.

Haha, zing.

Ravvenn said:

I have a honest question.

All of you seem to spill your guts post-breakup. I guess I"m curious if your significant others were aware of all of these feelings you"re outing now prior to the split.

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I let Mel know every day I loved her. I would cook for her. I brought her flowers out of the blue. I watched stupid crime dramas with her because she loved them. I did every thing I knew how to in order to keep her pleased and happy.

Apparently I was supposed to treat her like shit like I did all the other women in my life who still to this day call me. I was so bad to my baby momma she would call my mom crying asking why I was doing all this to her yet STILL she wants to be with me and have sex. I was too nice to Melody.

FoghornDeadhorn said:

I don"t think it"sherhead being in the wrong place he"s worried about.

Haha, zing.

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haha thats kind of true

I consider myself open minded. I"m not big on marriage, open relationships are ok with me. But I find it hard to get my head around what is going on with this one.

At the moment its really just a sexual relationship. I don"t think I"ll be proposing anytime soon.

Women get complacent when you"re nice to the, have to keep them on their toes!

She liked CSI, Law and Order, and Criminal Minds.

I"ve dumped girls for being religious about those shows, true story. If you are the type of person that thinks procedural cop drama is good television I just don"t think we are on the same intellectual level baby.

Except you Law and Order, you"re cool. Or you used to be.

Holy shit revelation today!

So everyone remembers this girl:

<iframe title="YouTube video player" width="640" height="390" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/6TPJ1uqF05w" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

Turns out...

My girlfriend has a LOT of friends that hang out with this chick. I laughed hysterically at her while she grew sadder by the second. What should I do now? I feel like I"m obligated to either meet and get an FOH pic with this crazy bitch or leave my girlfriend. I"m so confused. Help me FOH, you"re my only hope.

Eh, no reason to be bummed about a logical reaction like that. I would have done the same..

L&O went downhill after Claire died.

Anyhow, glad you got some balls in you, Jx3. I wish you luck with the new life.

Ravvenn said:

I have a honest question.

All of you seem to spill your guts post-breakup. I guess I"m curious if your significant others were aware of all of these feelings you"re outing now prior to the split.

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well, often when i feel like something is wrong and i ask her about it, she won"t respond or say it"s nothing.
in that case i feel it"s better to not push her for answers. i also avoid going into pussy diagnosis mode and come to false conclusions unless it"s something obvious to me. don"t let negative thoughts occupy your mind, it"s not healthy.
instead i simply try to be a good partner and think about what i can be doing better (i.e. i don"t try to fix her problems, but try to fix mine)

brekk said:

UNLESS, you make it clear upfront that it"s your preferred hobby, and that they"re opinion isn"t going to change that. If they can"t handle you doing that TFB they know where the door is.

edit: Don"t ever be apologetic for what you like doing.

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This is actually really great advice. Compromise is part of any long term relationship, but when either person feels like they can"t really do what they want to it tends to breed resentment.

The only time anyone has ever told me to lay off the video games is when I"m heavy into an MMORPG and I"m playing 6-8 hours a day on weekdays and 12 hours on weekends. At that point the girl has a very valid point that I"m spending way too much time playing video games instead of doing other things. I"m not talking about booting up Halo for 45 minutes a day after work.

Anecdotal to my experience but telling a girl honestly how you feel is relationship death if it isn"t -exactly- what she wants to hear.

There are of course stages, but sometimes it"s better to air that shit now than later after she"s already established her expectations.

Zehn - Vhex said:

Anecdotal to my experience but telling a girl honestly how you feel is relationship death if it isn"t -exactly- what she wants to hear.

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It really depends on what we"re being told. I mean, for example, I want to adopt since I can"t have my own kids. I would not have married my husband if he didn"t agree to adopt a couple of kids with me, because that is a major priority for me. So if I"m dating someone with the expectation of adopting, or getting married, and they say "Honey, to be honest, I don"t want kids/am not the marrying type", that would be relationship death since we have incompatible life goals.

On the other hand, I really, really wish the hubby would replace some of his old, ratty t-shirts because he looks like a schlub going out in them with holes and such everywhere. But I know he really likes the shirts, I know that I have no desire to be that wife that throws out a guy"s favorite clothes and replaces them while doing laundry, and it"s a minor thing to me. So when he said "Please stop asking me to throw away my shirts, I like them and I"m keeping them", that was that.

I"m sure that I do a bunch of stuff that annoys him, same as he does for me, but we deal with the little shit, and have already worked out the big shit.

There has to be compromise in a relationship. But you also can"t compromise your core values, nor can you expect another person to compromise on core values and beliefs no matter how absurd you think they are.

Your girl doesn"t like you gaming, and refuses to go out with you as long as you do so? Well, her loss, but that relationship was never going to work. At the end of the day, a successful long-term relationship means realizing that everyone has a touch of the crazy, and everyone does something that will drive you crazy, and finding a compatible partner means finding someone whose particular brand of crazy you can handle, and that you can handle the habits that drive you crazy.