IT/Software career thread: Invert binary trees for dollars.

ToeMissile said:

It makes sense, they’re going to spend time on larger offenders first. I know we’ve been ramping up on ops functionality built in house. Around 18 months ago they went live with using ML to process images for damage inspection of equipment in the field. There’s been a general increase in getting our collective asses out of the 90s. 100 yr old companies few.

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Yeah, considering we have like 8000 data models processing many terabytes of data daily they were sick of my shit lol.

Agile is prone to breaking down much faster than waterfall is due to the above.

Knowing all the requirements before you start coding? That's the kind of thing I jack off thinking about.

The biggest issues with Agile are three things:
First, like communism, it does not scale well. For a small project with well defined end point plus small smart team working on it, its the best workflow there is. For anything without a defined end point or expanded scope, it falls apart fast. Subnote on this, one lazy piece of shit/moron can derail an entire team, while waterfall has better counters to this sort of issue.

Second, it does not handle changes in team makeup very well. Specifically, if you try to plug someone new into an agile team ESPECIALLY if its replacing a key SME/Scrum Master/PO you end up disrupting the entire team (who were in a good routine with the prior person or team dynamic) and spending lots of time rolling the new guy into the fold. Waterfall tends to handle increases of manpower much better because it relies on plugging faceless drones who do the same tasks repeatedly into well defined roles. Agile is completely polar opposite of this, so you end up essentially having to retrain the entire team in a way.

Finally, Middle Managers are invading it and trying to reshape it into something like Waterfall to keep their status and obfuscate their uselessness. Most middle managers will insert themselves into PO or maybe (the less lazy ones) Scrum Master roles to keep their authoritative power. And because most middle managers are either useless leeching boomer fucks or retarded/nepotism hires who got peter principled into their present position, they end up being terrible in a critical role and you end up with the situation Khaine described.

For the record, I prefer working in an Agile framework because I dont require micromanaging and am in fact more productive when I manage my own time and workload. Plus I work with less retards in this situation, ideally. Unfortunately, my company pretty much is doing Agile because they are buzzword chasers and we have a major bloat of useless middle management who all want to look busy and just micro everything into the ground. And the ironic thing is these same leadership people are asking me to train them on Agile because I am the only one who as ACTUALLY done it and gotten the certs for it. I guess I have iron clad job security and good QOL, but it really drives me crazy seeing leadership pervert process for personal gain to such a brazen degree.

I very much prefer agile when I don't also have to waste my time in 5 hours of meetings a day while these same people expect me to be coding for 8 hours a day. I hate that so much. The director complained that I was putting so many hours into the meetings timebucket and I told him to look at my calendar of things I am being forced into.

Its finally decreasing because the director needs me to teach the rest of the team how to use database tools and design patterns more advanced than 1995. Not a single person on this team other than me, somehow, has ever touched object oriented programming. They are all COBOl, SQL, Mainframe, and system experts though and the organization is aggressively pursuing data modernization. But they cannot fire these people due to their expertise in the ancient architecture that runs the industry, while also needing them to get out of old habits.

It's kind of an interesting problem. We are making good progress though.

TomServo said:

Do you allow developers and such to run ssms from their workstations?

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I've personally never tried. I don't think anything stops you from doing that.

Well this project keeps getting more retarded by the second. We are getting close to the end and I have been the sole developer on this effort for our team. As my other team members can't even read python apparently. I keep telling the director that this is pretty ridiculous because the other team has 12 people actively coding on it.

I've made a ton of progress but I keep getting entirely new features dumped on me that would normally take a regular team maybe two developers and a sprint or more to do. But dude is just like, how hard can it be just add in this? Which I am getting really irritated by. For some reason he thinks we can reuse the other team's code but we really can't. They have entirely different use cases than we do and spending time going through their shit is actually a waste of time, so I stopped doing it.

He ain't listening So the pressure on COMPLETE FASTER just increases.