On the flip side, how fair is it for your kids to not be able to see one parent or the other for 5 days - 2 weeks at a time? It's bullshit, and it's selfish garbage perpetrated BY adults ON children who have no choice in the matter.
My kids were failed by their parents, absolutely no doubt about it. Two adults should be able to be reasonable human beings to each other if they decide to get married, and it's not the kids' fault we can't be. Now they get to suffer with either not being able to see their mom for 5 days (with me) or living in "some dudes" house and not being able to see their dad for 5 days (with Mom).
That's bullshit. It's on the adults. Take responsibility for your shitty choices and do the right thing for your kids. You decided to have them, it's your fucking job to give them the best life possible. It really pisses me off that she decided to throw away all the agreements we had just for a new dick who made more money, and I'm really disappointed in myself for not seeing how shitty of a human being she was before we decided to have my youngest.
Of course it's on the parents, and sometime just one parent but again at that time you have to make the decision whats best for them in the long run. Would your home have been a great place for your kids to be around you both while she was out getting dick all the time? Can you say that wouldn't turn into a toxic situation to be around for them?
At the end of the day, yes. It falls on us, as parents to ensure the best for our kids. Is it fair that parents split, to the kids? Probably not, but then again life ahead of them is full of decisions that aren't fair and it shows them that sometimes you need to make a tough decision in order for the betterment of life. It then falls on those parents to work extra hard for their kids to ensure things go as great as they can from then on out.
My first marriage, my wife was like yours, she wanted new dick. I can't help that. She got pregnant with twins and I sure as hell wasn't going to raise them and she didn't want me to. I then worked extra hard going forward. 11 years later, I still Facetime them multiple times a week (my oldest turned 16 today, my daughter is 12, turning 13 soon). Both are well adjusted, well behaved kids whom I have fantastic relationships with. This happened because I put in the extra effort to do my best to make sure sure that would happen. While I don't know for certain what would have happened had my ex and I stayed together, I know it wouldn't have been a healthy situation for them. At the time they didn't understand and that shit was the hardest thing I've ever done in my life. A decade later though they know the situation, they understand it and my son has told me he appreciates everything I've done for them.
Life sucks sometimes, we're forced to make decisions we don't like. When you have kids, every decision you make impacts them but more importantly, decisions you DON'T make can impact them even more. It's our job to try and figure out which is the better and hope, later, we made the best one and work hard going forward to ensure that that's just what we did.
