Marriage and the Power of Divorce
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Khane
Got something right about marriage
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Dates are mostly bad if you expect dates to be like they were in high school, when you were both inexperienced and anxious and just happy to be on one. Dates are fine if you manage expectations. You can still have a decent conversation with someone you have nothing in common with romantically if you are a personable human being who isn't trying to find eternal bliss with the click of a button on the internet.
That being said dating can definitely be exhausting but he seems to have the right attitude and expectations to be successful in meeting someone likeminded.
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iannis
Musty Nester
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Well sure, but when my mind starts to wander and I start thinking about stuff that I should be doing instead or would rather be doing instead I call that a bad date. Maybe I shouldn't, they're not really bad bad. Sometimes you're just sorta going through the motions. But yeah you can be pleasant and have a nice enough evening with a stranger. For sure. it's probably not fair to call that a bad date.
I know part of it's on me. You've got to be interested to be interesting and all of that.
But yeah, I don't mean that they're mostly horror shows. I've never had a real horror show of a date. My horror shows are more like "She seemed nice but ehh". That's usually also the group opinion of it i'm pretty sure. I don't date very often though either. I don't think even if I dated a few times a week you'd hit horror shows very often. It just doesn't work like that unless there is a lot of cocaine or alcohol involved.
No, I take that back. I have had one horror show of a date. And there was cocaine involved on her part.
I know part of it's on me. You've got to be interested to be interesting and all of that.
But yeah, I don't mean that they're mostly horror shows. I've never had a real horror show of a date. My horror shows are more like "She seemed nice but ehh". That's usually also the group opinion of it i'm pretty sure. I don't date very often though either. I don't think even if I dated a few times a week you'd hit horror shows very often. It just doesn't work like that unless there is a lot of cocaine or alcohol involved.
No, I take that back. I have had one horror show of a date. And there was cocaine involved on her part.
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Fifey
Trakanon Raider
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Every time I get back on Tinder/Bumble, I find it to be exhausting. I've become pretty good at using my apathy to help weed out bad dates but it's still at best a 50/50 shot on if I'll regret it within the first 5 minutes. Sure, I'll still stick around for 2-3 hours and have a chat or whatever but I'd rather just be home or doing something else more productive.
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Khane
Got something right about marriage
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That's not a bad date. That's being picky that you aren't going to enjoy the sex you may or may not have with your latest "swipe right". You knew what you were doing before you left your house. You aren't talking to some out of touch with the dating scene dude who got married at 20 here...
Fifey
Trakanon Raider
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I guess bad isn't the right word to use, let's call it a chore then. Modern dating is just knowing that you're just playing the numbers game 100 matches turns to maybe 10 dates which turns to 1 girl you'll see for 3 months before she flips the crazy switch on you and fakes a pregnancy or shits in your bushes.
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Big Phoenix
Pronouns: zie/zhem/zer
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Dating is a annoying waste of time half the time. Its one thing to meetup with someone, talk, share a drink and realize theres no spark or are incompatible with each other. Its another when you meetup and they are 50 pounds fatter, 10 years older, have kids they didnt mention, show clear signs of mental issues etc. At that point its like why the hell did you waste my time and money.
I bet this was her;
TrollfaceDeux
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i know this is kind of derail off topic but I am seeking some help here since this is the closest thing to a dating thread with a shred of maturity...
It is upsetting me slightly...or depressing me on occasions that I cannot find in the heart of me to ask girls out or hit on them even though clearly they show constant interest in me..
Even if I do, its some mindgame and it is just waste of time.. If there were no interest, it is one thing...but it is just fucking crazy that I keep missing the boat because I just don't want to do anything and at the same time I feel sad about my decision to not do anything...Once they see that I refuse to carry on, it sort of just fizzles off...or some drama happens...
it sucks because there are clear compatibility between several of them and I just..refuse to do anything further because I don't think it is worth it...
I still got 30 more pounds to lose before peak shape so maybe I will get more opportunity....but so far my experience hasn't been good..but I am relieved nothing came out of it...weird.
It is upsetting me slightly...or depressing me on occasions that I cannot find in the heart of me to ask girls out or hit on them even though clearly they show constant interest in me..
Even if I do, its some mindgame and it is just waste of time.. If there were no interest, it is one thing...but it is just fucking crazy that I keep missing the boat because I just don't want to do anything and at the same time I feel sad about my decision to not do anything...Once they see that I refuse to carry on, it sort of just fizzles off...or some drama happens...
it sucks because there are clear compatibility between several of them and I just..refuse to do anything further because I don't think it is worth it...
I still got 30 more pounds to lose before peak shape so maybe I will get more opportunity....but so far my experience hasn't been good..but I am relieved nothing came out of it...weird.
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Conefed
Blackwing Lair Raider
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There are plenty of YouTube videos about overcoming what you're describing.
But really, there's no big trick to it - just get yourself off the pedestal. Realize your personal ecosystem won't come crashing down if you go out on a limb.
TrollfaceDeux
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would you say adding people or talking to people who you are interested in, or if they know you are interested in them, on facebook a good idea or creepy thing?
iannis
Musty Nester
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Don't know that etiquette. Sounds like you're overthinking. Add them if you're interested, accept rejection of it comes.I
We far as, "should I take advantage of girls that I'm not really interested in but who would let me?" The answer is probably no. They may not be the easy marks you think though. They may be interested in a fixxer upper . Females are odd like that.
We far as, "should I take advantage of girls that I'm not really interested in but who would let me?" The answer is probably no. They may not be the easy marks you think though. They may be interested in a fixxer upper . Females are odd like that.
TrollfaceDeux
Pronouns: zie/zhem/zer
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yeah I had bad experience in the past (once..) and stopped doing it...Didn't want to take same path...
I don't mind the rejection anymore so its cool.
TrollfaceDeux
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Big Phoenix
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Im not in the habit deceiving others when it comes to dating so its hard to empathize with that.