Marriage and the Power of Divorce

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TJT

TJT

Mr. Poopybutthole
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alavaz said:
My dad's neighbors had a subscription to Adam & Eve so they got like 2 porno tapes per month or something like that. We had a shared driveway with like 4 people and at the end everyones mailbox was nailed to the same post. Anyway we got one of the tapes in our mailbox by accident one day (my dad used to send me and my brother to check the mail). We just saw that it was a movie and were like hey lets pop it in. I think we were like 12 and 11 and that tape opened up a whole new world. It was like 3 hours long and I think it was just like a highlight real type of thing because it had a bunch of different scenes with like Ron Jeremy and Traci Lords and other stars of that era, but I don't recall a cohesive plot.
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Be alavaz. First time watching porn at age 12. Be irritated at the lack of plot and remember this aspect of it for 30+ years.

Fucking nerd.
 
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alavaz

alavaz

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TJT said:
Be alavaz. First time watching porn at age 12. Be irritated at the lack of plot and remember this aspect of it for 30+ years.

Fucking nerd.
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So I know this is jokes, but it was all I had for probably 4 years before I got a computer and the internet. Memories were made that can not be unmade.
 
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Leadsalad

Leadsalad

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TJT said:
Be alavaz. First time watching porn at age 12. Be irritated at the lack of plot and remember this aspect of it for 30+ years.

Fucking nerd.
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I un-ironically read playboy in college for the articles because internet porn was far superior.
 
Noodleface

Noodleface

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The first actual.hardcore porn I watched was from the 70s on vhs. Dude shot cum all over the chicks bush and I thought yep this is how it's done
 
Hoss

Hoss

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Used to love the articles and jokes in playboy. After I was spent from jacking off I'd read those until i was ready to go again.
 
C

Cynical

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Looking back I don't think I ever actually bought a porn mag legit once I hit 18, BBS/Internet was easily accessible by that point.

I think it's time to tick off a mark on the bucket list, and make that east indian woman at 7-11 really uncomfortable this weekend. Porn mags, a thing of engine oil, miracle whip, some of that weird spicy Japanese candy I can't resist, and a bottle of hotsauce.

I actually need all that stuff, aside from porn mags, normally wouldn't buy it there, but lulz. Wife gonna think I hit my midlife crisis early.
 
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moonarchia

moonarchia

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Cynical said:
Looking back I don't think I ever actually bought a porn mag legit once I hit 18, BBS/Internet was easily accessible by that point.

I think it's time to tick off a mark on the bucket list, and make that east indian woman at 7-11 really uncomfortable this weekend. Porn mags, a thing of engine oil, miracle whip, some of that weird spicy Japanese candy I can't resist, and a bottle of hotsauce.

I actually need all that stuff, aside from porn mags, normally wouldn't buy it there, but lulz. Wife gonna think I hit my midlife crisis early.
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Shit, go for the gold while you're at it and ask the East-Indian if she wants to come over.
 
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Noodleface

Noodleface

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Been having a major first world problem lately. Wife's been jampacking our weekends so fucking full of shit. Like 1030 swim practice, then go to someone's house, then do some chore she dreamed up. Continue through until Sunday night and I'm fucking exhausted. It definitely has not been relaxing. I mean it's so bad I can't even mow the lawn - something she doesn't seem important. Is this what it's like my dudes .. because put a bullet in my brain
 
Soygen

Soygen

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Noodleface said:
Been having a major first world problem lately. Wife's been jampacking our weekends so fucking full of shit. Like 1030 swim practice, then go to someone's house, then do some chore she dreamed up. Continue through until Sunday night and I'm fucking exhausted. It definitely has not been relaxing. I mean it's so bad I can't even mow the lawn - something she doesn't seem important. Is this what it's like my dudes .. because put a bullet in my brain
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My friend goes through this every weekend. I suggest you set a precedent now and start declining certain things. My wife knows now not to plan anything without discussing it first, if she wants me to attend. I don't do the "Here's what we're doing today". I'm a planner and an introvert; I need to know well ahead of time and I need non-socialization time on the weekend to keep my sanity.
 
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alavaz

alavaz

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Noodleface said:
Been having a major first world problem lately. Wife's been jampacking our weekends so fucking full of shit. Like 1030 swim practice, then go to someone's house, then do some chore she dreamed up. Continue through until Sunday night and I'm fucking exhausted. It definitely has not been relaxing. I mean it's so bad I can't even mow the lawn - something she doesn't seem important. Is this what it's like my dudes .. because put a bullet in my brain
Click to expand...

My wife tries. I tell her all the shit I'm not interested in and will be abstaining from, but that she's welcome to do it on her own. She used to get mad at me about it, now she takes the opportunity to get a way from the kids for awhile, which is perfect for me.
 
Wantonsoup95

Wantonsoup95

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You're an adult, and saying "because I don't want to" is an acceptable reply. People who can't accept that are the ones with the problem!
 
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TJT

TJT

Mr. Poopybutthole
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Noodleface said:
Been having a major first world problem lately. Wife's been jampacking our weekends so fucking full of shit. Like 1030 swim practice, then go to someone's house, then do some chore she dreamed up. Continue through until Sunday night and I'm fucking exhausted. It definitely has not been relaxing. I mean it's so bad I can't even mow the lawn - something she doesn't seem important. Is this what it's like my dudes .. because put a bullet in my brain
Click to expand...

Yeah I just tell her that I am not doing that. Have fun. She used to bitch about it but now doesn't bother.

Just yesterday it was, "want to go to this dance party (which is some thing her salsa class or whatever the fuck it is is putting on)?" Since I don't give a shit about salsa I asked her what she expected me to do there and she said I could just sit there and read. Well I can sit at home and read too. Not happening.

I believe the real reason she tried was because she absolutely hates driving downtown and white knuckles driving 24/7 anyway. That's mostly because she didn't even have a driving license until she was 27. Thanks Europe.
 
lurkingdirk

lurkingdirk

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Alternatively, you could just say something slightly more positive like "I'm sorry, I can't come with you to (thing), I have to mow the lawn and take care of a few things around the house I haven't been able to get to." She can't program every hour, no matter how good the sex it right now.
 
Noodleface

Noodleface

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She keeps getting sick. I don't know what the fuck she's doing but she's been getting sick nonstop. Probably doing to much fucking shit
 
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Hoss

Hoss

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Cynical said:
Looking back I don't think I ever actually bought a porn mag legit once I hit 18, BBS/Internet was easily accessible by that point.

I think it's time to tick off a mark on the bucket list, and make that east indian woman at 7-11 really uncomfortable this weekend. Porn mags, a thing of engine oil, miracle whip, some of that weird spicy Japanese candy I can't resist, and a bottle of hotsauce.

I actually need all that stuff, aside from porn mags, normally wouldn't buy it there, but lulz. Wife gonna think I hit my midlife crisis early.
Click to expand...

I have some for 2 reasons. First because someone's gotta pay for the shit and if you dont buy the things you think are good, then how will they know to keep making it? Second and more important for shtf scenarios. My porn collection will be worth more than gold when the internet is dead.
 
McCheese

McCheese

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I'm going to be buying an engagement ring soon. I know she won't give a shit about the size or price; the only thing she'll care about is that it's not a conflict/blood or whatever diamond. As I'm reading around online I keep seeing things about how you can't really be sure about origin. I've seen some stuff about Canadian diamonds as a more guaranteed source of ethically(ish) sourced diamonds. Any experience with buying Canadian diamonds and making sure what you're getting is actually a Canadian diamond?
 
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Deathwing

Deathwing

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If you can't be certain, discuss alternative stones. Is she in love the idea of a conflict-free diamond but not the practicality of it?
 
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