Marriage and the Power of Divorce

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Cad

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TJT's dose of Crazy 2021:

Girl at work I met when I went to the office 1 time this year in late July. She was new and I said hello. Typical office meet and greet and I thought nothing of it (I guess she'd be a 6 or 6.5 out of 10 if I had to rate her). 32 year old single woman and a "dog mom" as is so common in Austin and libshit areas.

Starting in August she would message me on slack and asked for help with something that required Zoom call a few times. I realized she didn't actually need my help and stopped bothering. Messaged me about trivial things a lot and I would just shrug along and not really say anything a lot. In September she found my personal phone number from the company employee log. She was a recruiter btw. Texts my personal phone. I tell her she probably shouldn't have done that but proceeds to text me about stupid shit a lot. TV, Longhorns football, blah blah.

Most of her texts I just never answered. She would occasionally get slightly flirty and I would just say, "whatever" or not answer. My fault for not just saying outright no I get it but she knew I was married and had a kid and everything. I did answer her on slack usually where she was wise enough to not be flirty. My work profile says I am from the Oregon coast and she, on slack, asked me a bunch of shit about Oregon. I answered thinking nothing of it and she tells me she found a new job in Salem, Oregon of all places. I said I am happy for her and I hope she enjoys the state as it is a pretty good outdoors state. She asks me if I would ever visit her in Salem (obviously not as I don't want to in addition to being a near 4 hours of driving away from my hometown). I told her "lol maybe some day I haven't been to Salem in 20 years." Looking back on this I probably should have been more firm and direct. I had thought my 2 months of vagueness, non-responsiveness, and keeping it to small talk at work would have been hint enough. Oh, how wrong I was.

Week of Thanksgiving she asks, on slack, what I am doing. I say my mom is coming to visit me and the fam and we're going to go to a Thanksgiving party. I'm making brisket. Same thing I told my own team. Then she asks if she could meet my mom (finally my WTF bells go off). I tell her no, why would you ever meet my mom? Proceeds to call me 15 times straight and text me a bunch of shit. I didn't read any of it. Put my phone on airplane mode and blocked her number.

She immediately contacts my wife on Facebook, as well as my sisters, my mom, and every single person she can figure out that I know. As I am not on Facebook. Telling them how I promised her I'd move to Salem and have kids with her and sends them tons of screenshots of the texts and slack messages she sent me (that were all about trivial shit). She specifically sent the maybe I'd visit her in Salem one as some kind of gotcha. Sent this to two of my friends I mentioned by first name only as well. They contacted me later that night asking what was up as some random person contacted them on LinkedIn and Facebook both. Kind of impressive as I never told her any last names. Or any of my family members' names at all. She just knew my hometown and last name and a few first names.

But she didn't stop there. I had at some point mentioned the church we go to and she contacts the Father. Who then contacts me thinking I must atone for infidelity and asks if my wife knows. Just what I needed. I tell him I didn't feel like talking about it with him so he sends everything that she sent to him to my wife and he calls her too. I tell my wife and my mom what was up and we they eventually laughed after I showed them the slack log and the texts she sent me.

She at least never knew where I lived or how to figure out where I lived and show up there. Thank god. Or had some amount of sanity to realize that would be a bad move. Her last day is this week so I hope she quiets up and leaves me alone. My sister told me to get a restraining order.

On the other hand this confirms she was 100% guaranteed to have been an absolute whore in the sack. So that's a nice thought. Oh if I was 5 or so years younger!
I can't even fathom what she was hoping would happen. This would blow up your marriage, and then she'd finally get to be with you? Like what was the thought process?

If she's a 6.5/10, even as middling as that is, you would think she'd have guys chasing her. Why would she want to chase random married guys at work? (No offense).
 
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Hoss

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Found out today by reading a messege to her mother on her computer that she wants to move out etc.

She have had mental health problems the last 3 years and they have been getting worse

Not sure how much I should fight for this,

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Now I will read the next 3 pages and find out she's a tranny, you've been cheating on her for 3 years with her dogs, and you've been purposely feeding her psychotic medicine hoping you'd catch her flossing her teeth with buckshot on the security cams.

Oh and side note, engaged for 2 years and not married yet? One or both of you didn't really want to tie the knot. Unless you're wiccan and waiting for a blood moon or something like that.
 
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Hoss

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Or she stays and we solve our problems and everything ends with love and happiness.

Uh oh. This is a dangerous line of thought. 5 years from now she's still going to be there and you're going to be wondering every day if this is the day she leaves. cuntanayan is right, you need to kick her out.

I mean have you ever gotten 6 blowjobs in a row without stopping from a crazy redhead? It might have been worth it.

Yes. While watching bloodrayne and Monty Python's the meaning of life. We started bloodrayne and she said "I've already seen this, mind if I suck your dick?" When the movie ended she made me a sandwich. Then we started The Meaning of Life and she said "I've seen this one too" I don't know if I actually nutted 6 times but it's possible. She was a crazy redhead too. As amazing as the BJs were, the best part of sex with her were the machinegun/shotgun orgasms. She would lay there for a couple minutes after I was done shaking like a cat who'd gotten into some anti-freeze.
 

Hoss

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Part of me is surprised that she didn't contact my manager or leadership. Or she did and they just ignored it like I would hope.

In all seriousness, you need to show your boss the same shit you showed your family. If she hasn't tried to burn you at work yet, she still can. It won't cause any trouble for her, but it will inoculate you if she continues with the bullshit.
 
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Gavinmad

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I had at some point mentioned the church we go to and she contacts the Father. Who then contacts me thinking I must atone for infidelity and asks if my wife knows. Just what I needed. I tell him I didn't feel like talking about it with him so he sends everything that she sent to him to my wife and he calls her too.
I would go to the diocese and make a complaint against your priest. I don't think he needs shit-canned but a stern reprimand from the bishop might help him to think things through before acting in the future.
 
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Hatorade

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I miss crazy so much.

I think I've finally lost interest in sex with the wife...

Whenever she wants it I get bored.
If you tell her that I imagine things will change, she will either try harder/be more open or cut you off completely and since you not interested, win win?
 

TJT

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Actually, TJT TJT I would lever her with sexual harassment charges because Warr brings up a good point.
But she never did so on work channels. Just on phone SMS and I dont know which text would qualify as harassment. All the shit she sent my mom and sisters and wife?

Her last day at the company is Friday anyway.
 

Utnayan

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But she never did so on work channels. Just on phone SMS and I dont know which text would qualify as harassment. All the shit she sent my mom and sisters and wife?

Her last day at the company is Friday anyway.

It all does. She got your number from a work directory or outside work, doesn't matter - she works at the same place as you. She leveraged work channels to initially meet you - once it goes to text won't matter because you can offer those up as evidence. Just because this happened outside of work communication channels doesn't mean that evidence is thrown out. Then, get all the evidence from your friends, family, priest - use all of it, make the case, and launch. She leveraged her Linkedin to come after your co-workers/friends/affiliates in business.

I mean, this is a clear cut and dry case here as long as everything is 100% as you stated which I am sure it is.

Not only that, but Libel.
 

Captain Suave

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I would go to the diocese and make a complaint against your priest. I don't think he needs shit-canned but a stern reprimand from the bishop might help him to think things through before acting in the future.
My grandfather was an Episcopal bishop. A priest getting involved in family matters in any capacity other than passive support is a HUGE no-no (outside of abuse, obviously). I'd be fucking PISSED in TJT's shoes.

Solidarity brofist to him for having a reasonable spouse, even if he should have cut it off definitively and far sooner. A lot of spouses wouldn't just laugh this off no matter what the evidence.
 
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TJT

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I would go to the diocese and make a complaint against your priest. I don't think he needs shit-canned but a stern reprimand from the bishop might help him to think things through before acting in the future.
Yeah this part did piss me off and this particular Father has had a history of trying to be over involved in personal matters. One such example is that he has to personally approve of who you decide to be godparents for your kids. He also had a ridiculous list of requirements to fulfill before you're allowed to take the Eucharist there. Despite going for the last year I haven't bothered because get fucked dude. None of these things applied to my wife because she was born into the orthodox church so it doesn't matter. I don't dislike the guy but he took what some random person he's never met said to him on the internet and immediately made a thing about it. This woman isn't part of our church at all and has never attended it in any fashion. Actually I don't really think she's much religious at all. He did promise that he tells nobody and that he doesn't even tell his own wife about such things (yeah sure, dick).

I think most Priests would have not taken it to heart like that or whatever he was thinking. Or at least tried to have a conversation the next time at liturgy before calling me at 8PM and immediately info dumping via text to my wife when I told him I didn't want to talk about it.

That did piss me off.
 
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stupidmonkey

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She already knows where you live. Check your bushes as she probably shit in them. You'll be able to tell how long ago she was looking through your window.
 
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Soygen

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I can't even fathom what she was hoping would happen. This would blow up your marriage, and then she'd finally get to be with you? Like what was the thought process?

If she's a 6.5/10, even as middling as that is, you would think she'd have guys chasing her. Why would she want to chase random married guys at work? (No offense).
Sometimes you just can't explain the crazy.
 

Utnayan

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On a side note, TJT TJT when we play another coop game - you know damn well I am going to throw my voice when your wife walks by and she will hear - "But you said you would come visit me in Salem? I have that Longhorn cheerleader outfit you said you would like too!"
 
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Hatorade

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Wife going in for hysterectomy Friday, got snipped for nothing! Really though if all goes well no period and pains that go with it should really improve everyones quality of life. Past 8 months or so she basically never stopped bleeding and hysterectomy was recommended.
 
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TJT

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Lol, wut?
His reasoning makes sense somewhat. He is a newer Father of a Russian Orthodox Church who isn't even Russian or East European at all. He's from Texas. Born and raised. Which already makes some of the congregation dislike him as he can't even speak Russian. But his intent is to make the members reliant upon eachother and thus strengthening the church he is overseeing.

However its bullshit on the individual level.
 
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