Mass Effect: Andromeda - Autism reaches outer space

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Lithose

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The most bothersome thing to me is how Bioware seems to have no grasp of physics. In just the first minute of the game you are told (via cutscenes/monitors) that we used our telescopes and stuff to find the best planets in Andromeda and sent the arks to the ones with the biggest clusters of golden planets. Then it turns out (at least one) of the planet kinda sucks, and your PC makes a comment about how it could have changed so much in 600 years of FTL travel.

No you stupid fuck, Andromeda is 2.5m light years away so that means whatever your scanners picked up was from 2.5m years ago (ignoring how it is highly unlikely you will get down to planetary imaging from a distance of 2.5m LY, no matter how great your tech is). You couldn't even send a probe and get results from that, since that would have still taken hundreds of years to get there with zero way to send data back. I'd like to imagine the game eventually explains whatever happened did so over a million years, but most likely it'll all have happened in the previous 600 years.

Bioware can't even get really, really basic science stuff right :(

What's sad is that before the SJW hiring frenzy, they obviously cared about these kind of "science" aspects. It's why they made up that bullshit about entanglement communication, allowing them to transfer information instantly with entangled particles (Even though that's bullshit too, since entanglement doesn't work like that. But that's more of a 'good kind of bullshit', since to know that you'd need above a cursory knowledge of physics. Which is the acceptable kind of bullshit.)
 
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Regime

LOADING, PLEASE WAIT...
<Aristocrat╭ರ_•́>
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Whoa fellas Update:

EA has forced the Bioware team to put in a new ending.

RIP crew


 

Utnayan

F16 patrolling Rajaah until he plays DS3
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Honestly graphics don't bother me about games. Never have. Storyline and dialogue matters moreso than graphics, but gameplay matters the most. I have no idea how good the gameplay is because everyone is throwing a shitfit over duck-legs and derpface and not actually getting to the "game" part of the game. Be nice to know if it is actually fun or not.

Well, you'll be unhappy to know the storyline and dialogue is absolute shit. And the gameplay is mediocre at best.
 

Djevel Innenfor

Golden Squire
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I watched the first few hours of this game on stream. The animations never get better, the writing and dialogue gets worse, and even on the lightest difficulties weapons and powers seem weak. I watched some MP and it didn't get any better. Even watching some dude that had maxed out some of his abilities and trees, he lacked oomph. Combos seem meh and melee/abilities lack impact. When I detonated a fire combo in ME3 there was a fatty boom; shit got wrecked and died reduced to flaming ashes. When I did heavy melee attacks shit got clobbered. You could feel it. Here it's like he kinda sticks his arm out and the lifebar twitches. I'll play the 10 hour trial so I can say I did, but jesus. Feelsbadman.

Thank god there's a wealth of good games out, and in the pipeline.
 
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Tuco

I got Tuco'd!
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You knew this was coming...

Francis is always good at really describing how the inner child in me feels.

I want to make fun of all the mass effect fans for being disappointed, but I really could've gotten into a new ME game.
 
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Utnayan

F16 patrolling Rajaah until he plays DS3
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Francis is always good at really describing how the inner child in me feels.

I want to make fun of all the mass effect fans for being disappointed, but I really could've gotten into a new ME game.

Yeah at this point, let's hope Horizon Zero Dawn goes somewhere with the Apollo program in a story twist. That could be an epic space adventure.
 
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Scooby

Trakanon Raider
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Francis is always good at really describing how the inner child in me feels.

I want to make fun of all the mass effect fans for being disappointed, but I really could've gotten into a new ME game.

Ya, I know .. sadly I still have this on preorder, as much as I know this is going to be a turd of a game. I love the Mass Effect series so much and just want more of it, although I did change my order from deluxe to just the base game.
 

Qhue

Tranny Chaser
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There was one truly inspired yet insane individual who was responsible for making all the generic planets in the original Mass Effect have reasonable properties and science factoids for those star systems. I had wanted to reach out to Bioware Montreal about beefing that up for ME:A by including a lot more real astrophysics by way of stealth education of the populace and now I'm glad I never pulled the trigger on that.
 

Soygen

The Dirty Dozen For the Price of One
<Nazi Janitors>
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SJWs about non-existent complaints about Tracer in Overwatch:

C7FhBKKV0AApy0A.jpg


SJWs about finding out this chick in ME:A isn't gay:

C7FhBjwV4AE0Ka4.jpg
 
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goishen

Macho Ma'am
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There was one truly inspired yet insane individual who was responsible for making all the generic planets in the original Mass Effect have reasonable properties and science factoids for those star systems. I had wanted to reach out to Bioware Montreal about beefing that up for ME:A by including a lot more real astrophysics by way of stealth education of the populace and now I'm glad I never pulled the trigger on that.


Yah, you prolly would'a gotten laughed out of the room. "lol wut? This is ME. We don't need none of your learnin', boy!"
 
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Skanda

I'm Amod too!
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I'm suprised this SJW team didn't pull a DA2 and just make everyone Bi.
 
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Soygen

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The sex scene animations are going to be hilarious. I can't wait for the gifs.
 
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khorum

Murder Apologist
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Everytime I see the animations of the female lead I keep thinking they could easily fix her with just a tweak of her head rigging so that her head tilts forward a bit so she isn't always pointing at everything with her fucking man-jaw:


But then after watching a stream of the first couple hours, it dawned on me that her head is permanently skewed like that because THEY FUCKED WITH HER PROPORTIONS and her eyeline is tilting her head because she's so fucking stumpy.

They prolly HAVE tweaked it so she's not walking into shit with her jaws and we're looking at the best possible fix they could manage.
 
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Palum

what Suineg set it to
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Wait, what if we're all falling for Bioware's trap? Everyone will shit all over the human character animations and the day after release they'll say that the entire expedition was autistic because of the vaccines they got in cryo sleep and you're all just hateful racists!
 
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