If there is any tranportation in this made up zone it would have to be limited to a Rickshaw. I don't even know how that would be a debate.
The Samdaman character would need to include some form of text talking about the highest server burst dps.
We would need a trap NPC named Milly, or another trap npc with cock and balls hanging out with an NPC Fedor leading it.
Maybe a pimp NPC named Wolfin who hands out nudie mags that give some sort of stamina buff lasting up to 4 hours.
If there are any raid bosses the loot table would have to be a default cloth cap.
I would have a Lumie NPC who just talks to itself about aliens, garlic, and cinnamilk.
Some centaur type creature named Kate.
What was that one douche canoes name who used to talk about having songs written about him by some shit band? Coheed and Cambria or something? We need that guy as an NPC for sure.
Also I would include /pizza somehow into the zone. I am sure I can expand on this shit later but that's all that comes to mind for now.
For Sam, it would be cool if he was an actual enrage encounter like WoW has used. Let him live long enough and he starts yelling "I'm #1 DPS! You can't stop da man!"Then he actually hits for a couple million a shot until everyone is dead. You get the ignominy of actually losing to Samdaman...
I got nothing for the rest of your post.