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Rod-138

Rod-138

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She’s never not worked, and we talked about this idea of how nice it would be if she became the manager of our house - like all out assisting me with stuff and doing everything, but only if I made enough.

All of a sudden I’m making enough, but she has the good insurance so I’d prefer a work part time with insurance, but I’m not too worried about her pulling weight. I have heard it’s tough for some, psychologically, to be at home after 20 years of working.

Our kids would definitely benefit. We’re not all over the place scrambling, but sometimes it’s tough both working and coming home to homework and one of them sick etc
 
Hateyou

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Rod-138 said:
She’s never not worked, and we talked about this idea of how nice it would be if she became the manager of our house - like all out assisting me with stuff and doing everything, but only if I made enough.

All of a sudden I’m making enough, but she has the good insurance so I’d prefer a work part time with insurance, but I’m not too worried about her pulling weight. I have heard it’s tough for some, psychologically, to be at home after 20 years of working.

Our kids would definitely benefit. We’re not all over the place scrambling, but sometimes it’s tough both working and coming home to homework and one of them sick etc
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Does her company actually offer part time with insurance? Our company offers a half assed insurance at 30 hours a week and I think none of its under that.
 
Rod-138

Rod-138

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Exactly most don’t, but in a perfect world she could find a WFH type deal like some of my shitlord neighbors and we could ride off into the sunset getting the best of both worlds.
 
Hateyou

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Rod-138 said:
Exactly most don’t, but in a perfect world she could find a WFH type deal like some of my shitlord neighbors and we could ride off into the sunset getting the best of both worlds.
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Good luck. My wife works from home and a lot of times it ends she’s up glued to a chair for ten hours, sometimes later, sometimes weekends. She doesn’t take breaks to clean or anything so the house just gets more messy as the day goes on and she piles up dishes.

I do have a neighbor who works from home for some euro company and she’s able to clean the house, doesn’t work fridays, etc. They will also randomly decide the whole office is just going to go do something off site like go to a pub or a sports game and they just tell the work at home people to take the day off.
 
moonarchia

moonarchia

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Rod-138 said:
Hey sorry kind of wrong thread kind of right thread, but any of you experience a wife / mom going from full time to stay at home to run the house?

we have 2 kids and I’m starting to make some cheese, but it would definitely put a little more stress on me to deliver. Financially now, we’re in a good place, but if she quits we’re only in an ok place.

She would be able to focus on the 2 boys, 6/7, but I’ve heard and seen some mixed results from this. You get to come home to a house that is less chaotic potentially, but it’s not all sunshine and rainbows. Anyone have 2 cents ?
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Bear in mind that if you do this and things go south you will be paying alimony.

Also, with the economy as it is you should get as much as you can and pay off your house, cars, etc, and get your bug out bags ready or get a few years of MREs piled up in the basement.
 
Cad

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moonarchia said:
Bear in mind that if you do this and things go south you will be paying alimony.

Also, with the economy as it is you should get as much as you can and pay off your house, cars, etc, and get your bug out bags ready or get a few years of MREs piled up in the basement.
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I wouldn't do this setup solely because I don't want someone financially dependent on me other than kids. Creates extra stress and strain in the relationship that just isn't necessary or helpful.
 
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Uber Uberest

Uber Uberest

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My wife stopped working after our first son, we now have two boys 5 and 7. Best thing we ever did was having her stay at home. She gets all the bullshit done throughout the week and on weekends we hang out as a family. It’s terrific. It’s probably not for everyone, you have to be a strong man to do it, must guys now a days are kind of faggots, and it takes the right woman, of which most are entitled cunts.
 
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Tuco

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Been looking for a kid's smartwatch for a while for my 8 year old, I mostly want it for:
  • Him to text his neighborhood buddies to arrange hangouts
  • To reach out to us when he needs to or vice versa
  • Us to big brother track him
The new smartwatches are too expensive to give to an eight year old, and I imagine they have a lot of ways to let them watch youtube all day or something that I don't want to have to fight with.

We live in the kind of safe, family-rich neighborhood where you can pretty much kick your 7+ year old out of the house and tell them to come home when the streetlights come on, but it's still a bit goofy when your kid is asking you to be the middle-person with their friends or they're god knows where and you don't want to start calling around trying to find them.

We've looked a few times over the last year and haven't found anything decent, but just saw this:

Amazon product ASIN B0BWRBS9DF
Code: 
https://www.amazon.com/Laredas-Waterproof-Pedometer-Birthday-80-Black/dp/B0BWRBS9DF

It looks like a bunch of fake reviews, but who knows. It's not obvious from the product descriptions how hard it'd be for them to whitelist their buddy's cell #

What do y'all think?
 
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Larnix

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Both of my kids 10 and 8 have the Gimzo 3 watches after having gizmo 2 for about 2 years each. It sounds like our neighbors are very similar and a bunch of the kids here have them.

They can only have contacts that are pre-approved and unless their friends or family have gizmo or the app they can only be call contacts. It has GPS, you can force the call through, plus you can set quiet hours for school and evenings.
 
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Falstaff

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My daughter just turned 10 and we got her a Gabb watch. Has GPS, no other apps, Wife and I control what numbers she can add to it, so us, my parents, and all her friends that have Gabb or Apple Watches are all that are on there and it only accepts calls from those numbers. Can also do the quiet hours. We got this instead of Gizmo because I think Gizmo is only on Verizon? Price point is pretty good but it’s $15 a month as opposed to adding an Apple Watch for $10, so if you’re trying to min/max like I know you will, eventually this becomes more expensive.
 
Larnix

Larnix

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Falstaff said:
My daughter just turned 10 and we got her a Gabb watch. Has GPS, no other apps, Wife and I control what numbers she can add to it, so us, my parents, and all her friends that have Gabb or Apple Watches are all that are on there and it only accepts calls from those numbers. Can also do the quiet hours. We got this instead of Gizmo because I think Gizmo is only on Verizon? Price point is pretty good but it’s $15 a month as opposed to adding an Apple Watch for $10, so if you’re trying to min/max like I know you will, eventually this becomes more expensive.
Click to expand...

That is true you can only get Gizmo with Verizon which my wife and I aren't on. It comes out to $30 a month for the 2. But they sound basically the same. Gizmo just added a camera to the 3 so they can send pictures, videos and have up to a 3 minute video chat with the trusted contacts. I also like that the app can decide what kind of contact they can be, friend, caregiver, guardian, all with varying levels of permissions.
 
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lurkingdirk

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This is so relatable.

Parenting-Memes-Humor-21.jpg
 
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Falstaff

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My 7 year old son saw some nuts and bolts the other day and asked what they were. When I told him he said, oh so are they deez nuts?
 
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lurkingdirk

lurkingdirk

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Okay, here's a weird one. About my parents in law rather than being a parent.

I believe I've mentioned before that I'm the executor on my parents' in laws will. I've been working for a year to get all the information about their finances. We've all been very worried that they can't afford the care they now need. Both have Alzheimer's, and are now moving to a stage where they have to be in advanced care. They're both nearing 85. They have, for their entire lives (their children have said this many times), said that they had absolutely no money. They were broke. Since they were in basic care for the last year they were about breaking even with their pensions/retirement/etc. Now, with the care they are going to be getting they are going to be short by about $8K a month. Very worrisome.

The final number I got today as we combined all their accounts, the sale of their house, and everything they have is 1.8 million dollars. They're set for the rest of their lives.

This brings up a range of emotions. First, relief. They are self sufficient for more than 20 years. Great. Second, mild rage. Okay, not so mild. They refused to help their children with college tuition, with getting a vehicle, with basic needs, telling their children they had to get jobs to get clothes for school. While I agree these are valuable lessons, and my kids have all had jobs, and they are doing all they can to pay their own way, they also know my wife and I are here as a security blanket and will support them 100%. My inlaws told their kids they were 100% on their own because they had nothing with which to support them. They always had money to decorate the house, to support their own hobbies, but my wife and her siblings had to buy their own jeans.

Now that I have this information I don't quite know what to do with it. My wife is I think partially in shock. I'm pretty sure anger will surface soon. The issue is that her parents are mentally to a point where you just can't ask them to be accountable. They should be accountable, but any discussion we have today will be forgotten tomorrow, and they won't even remember things from the past for which they should be accountable.

I feel like an absolute asshole for being glad that the will is split equally between the kids, and they're not going to live long. But that's where I'm at. I don't know if that makes me an asshole or not, but seeing first hand how they treated finances for the last 25 years, and knowing the stories about it from my wife and her siblings just pisses me off something fierce. What would you guys do or feel in this situation?

Sorry for the long rant. I needed to put it into words. This ends my Ted Talk.
 
Hateyou

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lurkingdirk said:
Okay, here's a weird one. About my parents in law rather than being a parent.

I believe I've mentioned before that I'm the executor on my parents' in laws will. I've been working for a year to get all the information about their finances. We've all been very worried that they can't afford the care they now need. Both have Alzheimer's, and are now moving to a stage where they have to be in advanced care. They're both nearing 85. They have, for their entire lives (their children have said this many times), said that they had absolutely no money. They were broke. Since they were in basic care for the last year they were about breaking even with their pensions/retirement/etc. Now, with the care they are going to be getting they are going to be short by about $8K a month. Very worrisome.

The final number I got today as we combined all their accounts, the sale of their house, and everything they have is 1.8 million dollars. They're set for the rest of their lives.

This brings up a range of emotions. First, relief. They are self sufficient for more than 20 years. Great. Second, mild rage. Okay, not so mild. They refused to help their children with college tuition, with getting a vehicle, with basic needs, telling their children they had to get jobs to get clothes for school. While I agree these are valuable lessons, and my kids have all had jobs, and they are doing all they can to pay their own way, they also know my wife and I are here as a security blanket and will support them 100%. My inlaws told their kids they were 100% on their own because they had nothing with which to support them. They always had money to decorate the house, to support their own hobbies, but my wife and her siblings had to buy their own jeans.

Now that I have this information I don't quite know what to do with it. My wife is I think partially in shock. I'm pretty sure anger will surface soon. The issue is that her parents are mentally to a point where you just can't ask them to be accountable. They should be accountable, but any discussion we have today will be forgotten tomorrow, and they won't even remember things from the past for which they should be accountable.

I feel like an absolute asshole for being glad that the will is split equally between the kids, and they're not going to live long. But that's where I'm at. I don't know if that makes me an asshole or not, but seeing first hand how they treated finances for the last 25 years, and knowing the stories about it from my wife and her siblings just pisses me off something fierce. What would you guys do or feel in this situation?

Sorry for the long rant. I needed to put it into words. This ends my Ted Talk.
Click to expand...
Feels like a complete waste of time to put any emotion towards it at all other than being glad they’ll be able to pay for their own care. So they saved money while being cheap asses their whole lives, meh. While they didn’t help people…they’re not going to be a burden on their family later than life. My wife and I, both of our families were broke, didn’t help with college or cars or shit, and they will likely become burdens on us later in life and will leave us nothing but bills. The hard times for you are in the past, be thankful for the now + future their savings will provide. This is a total first world problem.
 
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ToeMissile

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Let yourself feel whatever is there and then let it go. Nothing good will come from holding on to anything. Like Hate said, be glad there's no burden.
 
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moonarchia

moonarchia

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lurkingdirk said:
Okay, here's a weird one. About my parents in law rather than being a parent.

I believe I've mentioned before that I'm the executor on my parents' in laws will. I've been working for a year to get all the information about their finances. We've all been very worried that they can't afford the care they now need. Both have Alzheimer's, and are now moving to a stage where they have to be in advanced care. They're both nearing 85. They have, for their entire lives (their children have said this many times), said that they had absolutely no money. They were broke. Since they were in basic care for the last year they were about breaking even with their pensions/retirement/etc. Now, with the care they are going to be getting they are going to be short by about $8K a month. Very worrisome.

The final number I got today as we combined all their accounts, the sale of their house, and everything they have is 1.8 million dollars. They're set for the rest of their lives.

This brings up a range of emotions. First, relief. They are self sufficient for more than 20 years. Great. Second, mild rage. Okay, not so mild. They refused to help their children with college tuition, with getting a vehicle, with basic needs, telling their children they had to get jobs to get clothes for school. While I agree these are valuable lessons, and my kids have all had jobs, and they are doing all they can to pay their own way, they also know my wife and I are here as a security blanket and will support them 100%. My inlaws told their kids they were 100% on their own because they had nothing with which to support them. They always had money to decorate the house, to support their own hobbies, but my wife and her siblings had to buy their own jeans.

Now that I have this information I don't quite know what to do with it. My wife is I think partially in shock. I'm pretty sure anger will surface soon. The issue is that her parents are mentally to a point where you just can't ask them to be accountable. They should be accountable, but any discussion we have today will be forgotten tomorrow, and they won't even remember things from the past for which they should be accountable.

I feel like an absolute asshole for being glad that the will is split equally between the kids, and they're not going to live long. But that's where I'm at. I don't know if that makes me an asshole or not, but seeing first hand how they treated finances for the last 25 years, and knowing the stories about it from my wife and her siblings just pisses me off something fierce. What would you guys do or feel in this situation?

Sorry for the long rant. I needed to put it into words. This ends my Ted Talk.
Click to expand...
Hate covered it mostly. But why feel angry about it at all? They were smart about it, and unless your wife or her siblings actually suffered they literally did nothing wrong. At 85 they were born during the Great Depression, and grew up in the aftermath, when people were quite serious about being thrifty. They lived within their means and tried to pass those ideals on to their kids. Their job as parents was to keep them alive and healthy until 18.

Paying for first cars and college and all that is actually shitty parenting, because it makes kids reliant on you well after they should be independent. That is literally good times making weak men writ large.
 
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