They are two sides of the same retarded coin. In the simplton D3 side you have to grind for hundreds of hours to get anything BIS because they made the moronic decision to take away trading (afrer admitting it was wildly popular) and made drops tailored to the class. On the autistic side POE wants you to grind 100s of hours to get the currency to try and make something BIS because they made the moronic decision to take away any type of deterministic crafting (after admitting it was wildly popular) and go back to a system akin to slamming your dick in the door.
Congratulations for admitting you are autistic and suggesting everyone else is probably normal to not enjoy your level of autism.
To be fair, grinding for gear is the core loop of Diablo-likes. There's kinda nothing else to do, there's a one time story originally but past that, you just grind to get better gear to grind faster, until you decide to reroll and grind gear again on that new build/class.
The way you grind is immensely important. You use D3 as a "retarded" way but I'd say it's overall fairly good at it. You first grind for your good gear, that's your set+whatever items go in the cube powers. Then you can grind for better version of the items(ancients or whatever they were called), which are slight improvements, but ultimately the build is functional once you have all the base items. There's no trading, so you have to grind yourself, but the grinding, at least for the first basic set is actually pretty smooth and easy. There's another layer of masochistic grinding after that if you want, or if you don't want you just roll another class or try another build within the same class, until you get bored. Also season objectives.
In PoE however, you almost never farm for your own gear. Instead you prioritize farming currency, which you then use to buy your gear from either lucky people, or from people who spend their entire time flipping currency and crafting high end stuff that's absolutely not worth trying to make yourself. A few things you can craft yourself with like fossils and stuff, but the truly good gear you just buy. Even uniques, which aren't hidden behind a stupid layer of initial currency investment and all the crafting loops, are so rare that most of the time you're still better off buying than trying to grind(with the one deterministic loot system, cards, and that's assuming there's cards for the item you want which is another issue). The entire gearing process is basically based on trading, because it's assumed you can't reasonably progress on your own. You can do SSF obviously, but unless you're one of those streamers that play the game 12+hours a day for weeks on end, which realistically most people aren't going to be, you only have a limited amount of viable builds that aren't too gear reliant.
As much as I prefer PoE over D3 for many reasons, the gearing/loot systems aren't it. I'd much rather just not have to trade for anything, have uniques being common(which still wouldn't make all of them very easy to attain cause there's like what, 1000s of uniques nowadays? So even if they all had the same weight and they dropped every minute, it'd still take you dozens of hours to get the right ones) and have deterministic simplified crafting with bench being cheaper/more powerful, fossils and harvest and whatever else, so you can craft your own shit on your own with your own currency and get good gear without requiring a mirror worth of currency to make the items. They could still have trading on top.
Obviously they're not interested in doing that at all however, they seem to think making it too easy to obtain your own items would shorten the lifespan of new leagues, which I honestly don't know if that's the case, they might be right. I'll just say I don't like the current system. I can live with it and play by its rules, but I don't like it and much prefer the D3 "do it yourself" approach and I feel the game would be a lot better like that, even if it was in SSF only(but they've said repeatedly they don't want to bother doing any change to SSF only).
