Recommend a dating site

Reminds me of a Seinfeld episode

Noodleface_sl said:

Reminds me of a Seinfeld episode

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You know, my friends tell me constantly that I'm overly picky. But I can't picture spending the rest of my life with someone who's voice grates on me. Do you think it's something you get used to? Kind of like a house full of animals? You smell it at first and it's abhorrent but then you just get used to it and don't notice anymore?

What's wrong with my analogy? It's rock solid. I want some serious third party input here. My friends are too close to the situation.

There could be a legitimate good reason for the voice

http://loveline.wikia.com/wiki/Little_Girl_Voice

I dated and lived with a girl for several years once with the same thing, she spoke and laughed almost like a little kid, even though we were both in our mid-20s by then. Come to find out she was molested by her uncle repeatedly as a child, an uncle whom her parents would drop her off to stay with for several weeks each summer. She also had some odd sexual fetishes that I can only imagine stemmed from this as well. Of course, she also ended up being quite mentally unstable which slowly showed itself over time, and I got the hell out of there ASAP once I realized it wasn't going to get any better.

Well she doesn't talk like a child, her voice just has the pitch of a 12 year old. She's articulate and well educated. She doesn't use any goofy, child like words or phrases.

Khane_sl said:

Well she doesn't talk like a child, her voice just has the pitch of a 12 year old. She's articulate and well educated. She doesn't use any goofy, child like words or phrases.

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Same in my situation, it was purely pitch, she was well educated and articulate otherwise

Khane_sl said:

You know, my friends tell me constantly that I'm overly picky. But I can't picture spending the rest of my life with someone who's voice grates on me. Do you think it's something you get used to? Kind of like a house full of animals? You smell it at first and it's abhorrent but then you just get used to it and don't notice anymore?

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Just like a house full of animals that smell will waft up on you randomly in full force. It's a negative attribute, that's for sure. How important of a negative and how it balances against the positives is for you to know and us to find out.

If that's her only significant negative attribute though it would be insane to not give it a real college try. (Get black out drunk and decide to deal with it next week)

I was "single" for 2 weeks or so before I met her. Finding dates on Match or OKC or POF has never been an issue. Finding someone I really feel connected to is. The amount of other options literally a mouse click away may be to blame. I honestly haven't figured that out.

I had a really bad break up in March of 2012. I took a few months to try to collect myself and started dating again in July. In that time I've used all 3 of those sites on and off. I've been on what I would estimate as ~40 first dates. Of those I felt compelled to ask about 25 or so on second dates. Of those 25 only one of them didn't want to see me again, but none of those ever lasted more than 2 months and only 2 of them made it that far. I'm starting to get frustrated, exhausted, disenchanted and apathetic towards dating. The amount of women close to my age (30) that still have no direction and haven't established themselves is laughable.

When I was younger I was very noble and idealistic about dating. When I was 23 I met two girls over the course of a weekend. I liked both, both liked me but I refused to date two women at the same time so I chose one. We dated for 3.5 years and it ended amicably. 2 months later I started using Match and had 2 dates lined up for one week. I went out on the first, decided I liked her and canceled the second date. We dated for a year and half and that ended horribly. It was devastating because I thought she was "the one". Up until that point I always thought dating multiple people even for a week was for insecure people who needed some form of egotistical self-validation. After that breakup I thought "fuck, what if one of those other girls really was the one, I'm never letting that happen again". The problem is I really hate being alone and really want kids. The realization over the past year that there really are plenty of fish in the sea is comforting in a way but it's fleeting and ends up just making me feel like a dick. I also know I am not the type of person to ever "settle", so that leads to me dating lots of people rather than just trying to "make it work" with someone I'm not fully invested in.

Araysar_sl said:

He's already made the decision to dump her. What he asking for here is someone to agree with his rationalization as to why he's doing it.

I am also 99% certain that he will lie to this girl as to real reason why he is doing it because he originally acknowledged it in his post that it is a shallow thing to do. And of course, he certainly doesn't think of himself as a shallow guy.

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You're dead on here. But if I do end up lying to her it won't be for fear of being shallow, it will be because I don't want to make her feel bad about something she can't change.

Tuco_sl said:

What's funny is that the pitch of ones voice is easily changeable and he'd be doing a favor by telling her 'look your voice irritates me because it's too high pitched. Get that shit taken care of."

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Other people have already said that to her. She even acknowledged it on our first date and joked a little about it. Which was charming at first.