Red Pill Thread 2.0: Neckbeard Revenge

Deathwing_sl said:

Rambling self justification aside, I still agree with Xequecal that you don't bring it up until you get to know someone better. Tell them you like something socially acceptable like Super Mario Brothers or Guitar Hero and then quickly move on. There is still a lot of stigma in our culture about people who play video games, specifically from the previous generation. And they're our bosses and politicians. There's generalizations and stereotypes that I'd like to avoid if possible.

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Yep. I was best man at my friend's wedding a few months ago. We met playing EQ 10 years ago and have been really good friends ever since. I didn't know anyone there (including the bride other than from being friends on Facebook), so it was interesting seeing the reaction of the 100-150 people I met when they found out the groom initially knew his best man from online gaming. It didn't phase most of them because after chatting, they realized I'm a normal person and not some basement dwelling neckbeard. There were a few of his friends that were pretty passive aggressive about being left out of the wedding for an "online gaming friend" though. It was certainly an obstacle getting around the stigma for the first day until they got to know me better, and by the end of the trip we were all friends. Didn't stop me from getting some of dat bridesmaid ass either .

Key for me was owning it and moving on. Then again, gaming isn't a big part of my life any more other than maybe 4-8 hours a week.

Disp_sl said:

Yep. I was best man at my friend's wedding a few months ago. We met playing EQ 10 years ago and have been really good friends ever since. I didn't know anyone there (including the bride other than from being friends on Facebook), so it was interesting seeing the reaction of the 100-150 people I met when they found out the groom initially knew his best man from online gaming. It didn't phase most of them because after chatting, they realized I'm a normal person and not some basement dwelling neckbeard. There were a few of his friends that were pretty passive aggressive about being left out of the wedding for an "online gaming friend" though. It was certainly an obstacle getting around the stigma for the first day until they got to know me better, and by the end of the trip we were all friends. Didn't stop me from getting some of dat bridesmaid ass either

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Key for me was owning it and moving on. Then again, gaming isn't a big part of my life any more other than maybe 4-8 hours a week.

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I don't think you guys understand what I was saying. You don't say "Hey I play Everquest 18 hours a day and am in a top tier guild that raids. We've got our eyes set on a couple world firsts in NToV once Scars of Velious releases". You just say, yea "I like to play video games". Just like you don't say "well I'm a 7 handicap and typically shoot in the high 70s or low 80s, trying to get a group of guys together to go on a Bandon Dunes trip sometime this summer. Though it'll be strange because I'm used to bent grass". You just say "I like to golf".

You can't honestly be that socially retarded. I'm talking about people who are afraid to even say "Yea I play video games". Goddamn...

Deathwing_sl said:

That's because the stigma starts at "yeah I play video games" and the conversation doesn't end there either.

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I don't know what world you live in. But like 90% of the guys my age that I interact with own playstations or x-boxes. And those qualify as video games. There is no stigma amongst our peers bros. Seriously. Get over it.

I've maybe had that problem with one girl. Rest have been fine. I'm completely unapologetic for who I am. I tend to date slightly dorky girls anyway for ltr's. If I'm using her as a disposable spermcatcher, yeah I won't maybe bring up games. I also won't tell her shit about family, etc either.

Deathwing_sl said:

That's because the stigma starts at "yeah I play video games" and the conversation doesn't end there either.

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Khane's 100% right. No normal person nowadays is going to look down on you if you say "I like to play video games" and you're a mostly normal looking male in his 20s or 30s. It's a hugely popular hobby that has easily crossed into the mainstream.

Hell, don't they show video game commercials on prime-time TV nowadays? If that isn't mainstream, I don't know what is.

*Edited to add based on Deathwing's post above* You're right about people from previous generations who don't understand how the balls go through the intertubes, but is that what we're talking about in this thread? This is the redpill thread, and I thought the topic of video games was in regards to mentioning it to a chick, not your boss, a politician, or some cougar 30 years older than you.

Deathwing_sl said:

What do you gain from letting your boss or potential girlfriend know you play video games before you're somewhat sure it's safe? Why does it have to be open book immediately?

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Does redpillhelp with bosses too? Why are you talking about your boss? I'm not sure why you'd be so insecure about adding "video games" to the list of hobbies during conversation. The stigma really isn't there man.

You said previously video games is pretty much your only hobby. So if a date asked you "what do you do for fun" you'd have to lie. But here's the real problem. Having just one hobby is a problem. You may not think you're boring but guess what dude, you're fucking boring. If there is only one thing you like to do in your free time you're really goddamn boring, and it doesn't matter what it is. You could be really into cars, which has no stigma attached to it but if that was your only hobby and that's all you could talk about guess what, the woman sitting across from you is going to think you're really, really boring unless she's also into cars.

I'm shocked I need to explain this to grown men.

It's going to shift with geography. My experience with many southerners is that cartoons, videogames, comics, etc. are "for kids" still. I suspect the attitude in Austin, the northeast, and the west coast will be a little different.

My boss knows I play videogames. I doubt he thinks about it. I don't talk about them on a first date unless the chick has decided the personality she's faking is "nerd" culture.

Deathwing_sl said:

The stigma is there. The point about the bosses and politicians was to establish that it exists, more prevalent in the previous generation. That doesn't mean it's eradicated in ours. Also, it was another example of when not to be so open.

Your definition of "interesting" is close minded. It's almost like you're prejudice against people that have found a hobby they really really like. Hmmm....I wish there was a word for that.

I've already admitted that liking fewer things will reduce the chance of finding someone with like interests, but in no way does that make the person boring.

EDIT: I'll clarify that most of my experience with this in the workplace. First job out of college(2005) and I was disappointed to find most of my colleagues did not play video games. Granted, this was Vermont, so locale might have had an effect.

I just don't see the point of offering up that information until you're relatively certain it's safe. What's to gain? Talk about politics, religion, cats, touchdown jesus, whatever until you know her better. You should be telling people to learn how to better hold conversations, not to like more shit.

You cite your friends as owning consoles, but I'm going to assume most posters here aren't gay. The females that I interact with at work or through my wife, they don't play video games. Or they are like me and don't tell anyone about it

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You're fooling yourself. Having only one or two hobbies that occupy all your time makes you boring to anyone who doesn't share those hobbies. Whereas having a multitude of things you enjoy shows an openness to branching out and trying new things as well as widening the prospects of matching up similar interests.

Also, I never said my friends play video games. I said 90% of all men my age that I interact with. And most women our age definitely do not play video games. That's not the point. Most women our age don't golf either. But I can still tell women I meet on first dates that I enjoy doing both of those things in my free time without worrying whether they think I'm a social invalid. You're too insecure.

And in that regard redpillhas it nailed. Don't care what they think about you. Own it.

Soygen_sl said:

I disagree with the 'few hobbies' = boring to others. It's more than just hobbies that make someone interesting. Being smart, funny or extremely attractive for instance.

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Well, sense of humor and attractiveness definitely. But if everytime someone asks you "hey what are you up to this weekend" you always, without fail have the same answer they are quickly going to stop calling you to find out because they just don't give a shit.

Deathwing_sl said:

Don't care what they think!



Wait, do care!

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You're twisting those words quite a bit to try to fit them around your logic. You shouldn't care how people perceive the things you enjoy doing. Don't lie about your hobbies. You should care about putting your best foot forward. You should care about your personal hygiene and general health. You should care how you present yourself to the world and not looking like a goddamn slob. These are matters of personal pride. You don't do that for other people, you do that for yourself. If all you ever do in your free time is play video games that isn't really a hobby anymore. It's an addiction. It's also really boring that you only care to do one thing with your free time.

Like I said, it doesn't matter what hobby that one hobby is. If every time a friend called me and asked me what I was up to I said "golfing" they would very quickly lose interest in asking me what I was up to. And probably stop making an effort to talk to me at all. You want to deny it but video games do not have a negative social stigma attached to them.

If a woman you're meeting for the first time asks you what you like to do for fun and all you can say is "Oh I like to play video games" that conversation is going to dry up quickly, because you aren't contributing much to the conversation. If she asked the same question and all you can say is "Oh I like to golf" you will get the same result. This is what you can't see. But it's true.

Where if a woman asks what you like to do for fun you say.

"Well I'm really into beer, I go to a few beer fests every year and visit a lot of the local breweries and brew pubs. I also love live music. I see as many shows as I can, mostly in NYC and Boston. I like to golf, actually I may be slightly addicted to golf. I visit a lot of friends on the weekends and take a lot of road trips, especially during the summer. I go on hikes on nice days at a couple of small mountains close by. I actually just started doing Yoga too, that shit kills right now. Friends of mine have a lot of bonfires when weather permits and they all have young kids so I don't get to see them much so I do that with them as often as I can. And in the winter I play a lot of video games because new england sucks or throw on my hockey skates and go to whatever frozen pond in the area I feel like."

Now she can pick whatever she wants to ask me about or whatever she finds a common interest in and the conversation will last much longer and be far more interesting for both parties involved. And the above sentence is actually exactly how I answer that question typically.

Deathwing, you really honestly sound way too insecure.