Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker

fris · Jul 30, 2018

Gamma Rays said:
When this comes out we need to pick an episode 9 canary.

Someone here to go in and bravely risk it all for the good of the FoH brother-(sister)-hood.

Oh and -cough- clearly not me as I am the planner and organizer of this mission.

not it

Siliconemelons · Jul 30, 2018

Many of us will go I am sure, it will make tons of money - there is no doubt in that.

Sterling · Jul 30, 2018

Yeah, I'm sure I'll get wrangled into going with my friends.

DickTrickle · Jul 30, 2018

It's hard not to see it pulling in $600M. I would be pretty shocked if it fell below that, especially given how lucrative that holiday season is. If it was in the summer, maybe, but I say no chance it falls below $600M at Chrismas time.

sukik · Jul 30, 2018

I go watch them because it's a family thing, not because I care about Star Wars.

TJT · Jul 30, 2018

Sterling said:
What kind of odds are there that this will be worse than The Last Jedi was?

I am curious what level of retcon Jew sorcery will be needed to correct the whole thing where the entire, "rebellion" is a handful of people on the Millenium Falcon and that's it.

Malakriss · Jul 30, 2018

DickTrickle said:
It's hard not to see it pulling in $600M. I would be pretty shocked if it fell below that, especially given how lucrative that holiday season is. If it was in the summer, maybe, but I say no chance it falls below $600M at Chrismas time.

If the concluding chapter of a Star Wars trilogy ONLY pulls in $600-800M with today's prices that is a complete and total failure. Even Episode 3 in 2005 climbed back to $848m.

edit: it occurs to me you were probably talking domestic. My comment was for worldwide as I could totally see it bombing and making less than Episode 3.

DickTrickle · Jul 30, 2018

Malakriss said:
If the concluding chapter of a Star Wars trilogy ONLY pulls in $600-800M with today's prices that is a complete and total failure. Even Episode 3 in 2005 climbed back to $848m.

edit: it occurs to me you were probably talking domestic. My comment was for worldwide as I could totally see it bombing and making less than Episode 3.

Yeah, I meant domestic. Man, if episode 9 did 600-800M worldwide, you might see executives jumping out of their high rise windows, heh.

I think it is worth keeping in mind that both of the second films in the other trilogies were the lowest performers and actually had percentage drops similar to TLJ's -- so it wasn't a complete outlier in that sense. And then the third films had a decent increase. People are more likely to come to a concluding chapter and I think Abrams will play it safe and give some fan service so that word of mouth isn't as bad.

Korillo · Jul 30, 2018

At least in episode 3 you knew that you were going to get to see Anakin become Vader. People had a reason to want to go watch the conclusion. What exactly am I supposed to be looking forward to in Episode 9?

Is it Rey, the character who did practically nothing in episode 8, has had 0 training, and doesn't actually seem to have any motivation towards a goal?

Is it Kylo, the flip flopping "bad" character? Wasn't it implied he was supposed to finish his training in TFA? Well ya, that never happened either. Exciting to watch two amateur force users "decide the fate of the galaxy".

Is it Poe, the dude who is good at flying a ship?

Is it Finn, the guy who has spent 2 movies trying to run away from any responsibility? I wonder what he'll run away from in episode 9, that will make me want to go see it.

Is it Rose, the janitor turned rebel pilot that fell in love with a dude she only met 3 hours ago?

Oh right, it must be Lando. I am supposed to want to go see episode 9 so I can see how they kill yet another original character, right? Him and Chewie will probably be forced to sacrifice themselves, very exciting.

Seriously though. Did I miss what epic conclusion The Last Jedi set us up for?? What the fuck am I supposed to be looking forward to seeing play out on the big screen? It's even worse when some sources are suggesting that they may split Episode 9 into 2 films. If they end up doing that, episode 9 needs to be the best star wars film ever made or people are gonna riot.

Chukzombi · Jul 30, 2018

TJT said:
I am curious what level of retcon Jew sorcery will be needed to correct the whole thing where the entire, "rebellion" is a handful of people on the Millenium Falcon and that's it.

it would have to be through some kind of mind telepathy ninja kill. Rey mindfucks Kylo and has him cause chaos within the FO til he gets killed by his own men and then the FO is in disarray long enough for the rebels to rebuild.

TJT · Jul 30, 2018

Korillo said:
At least in episode 3 you knew that you were going to get to see Anakin become Vader. People had a reason to want to go watch the conclusion. What exactly am I supposed to be looking forward to in Episode 9?

Is it Rey, the character who did practically nothing in episode 8, has had 0 training, and doesn't actually seem to have any motivation towards a goal?

Is it Kylo, the flip flopping "bad" character? Wasn't it implied he was supposed to finish his training in TFA? Well ya, that never happened either. Exciting to watch two amateur force users "decide the fate of the galaxy".

Is it Poe, the dude who is good at flying a ship?

Is it Finn, the guy who has spent 2 movies trying to run away from any responsibility? I wonder what he'll run away from in episode 9, that will make me want to go see it.

Is it Rose, the janitor turned rebel pilot that fell in love with a dude she only met 3 hours ago?

Oh right, it must be Lando. I am supposed to want to go see episode 9 so I can see how they kill yet another original character, right? Him and Chewie will probably be forced to sacrifice themselves, very exciting.

Seriously though. Did I miss what epic conclusion The Last Jedi set us up for?? What the fuck am I supposed to be looking forward to seeing play out on the big screen? It's even worse when some sources are suggesting that they may split Episode 9 into 2 films. If they end up doing that, episode 9 needs to be the best star wars film ever made or people are gonna riot.

The only thing I liked about TLJ is Kylo's whole, "fuck the Sith, fuck the Jedi, fuck this and fuck you old fucks, I'm just going to do me."

Screamfeeder · Jul 30, 2018

Gamma Rays said:
When this comes out we need to pick an episode 9 canary.

Someone here to go in and bravely risk it all for the good of the FoH brother-(sister)-hood.

Oh and -cough- clearly not me as I am the planner and organizer of this mission.

I'll do it. I'll probably see it opening night like all the rest.

But of course any review I give is tainted with the worst kind of fanboism so anything I say is suspect.

Deathwing · Jul 30, 2018

sukik said:
I go watch them because it's a family thing, not because I care about Star Wars.

It's about family?

Metalhead · Jul 30, 2018

Deathwing said:
It's about family?

It's about saving what we love.

Chukzombi · Jul 30, 2018

Deathwing said:
It's about family?

sure, you didnt get that vibe when Kylo murders his dad and when luke tries to murder his nephew? no warm and fuzzies?

Xevy · Jul 30, 2018

I'm going to see it. Probably opening night. Probably IMAX 3D. Hope it doesn't suck. Last one was mediocre for sure, but my butt isn't as hurt as the collectives is. I really like TFA.

Screamfeeder · Jul 30, 2018

Chukzombi said:
sure, you didnt get that vibe when Kylo murders his dad and when luke tries to murder his nephew? no warm and fuzzies?

You remember when Luke just fucked off when the ONLY parental figures he has ever known were burnt to a crisp byt the exact same Imperial Power he was SO jonsed to hook up with (BUT MAH ACADEMY!)? But then....TWIST!!!! He fucked off IMMEDIATELY with some trailer park hermit he knew nothing about other than some Witchers tales. Why? Because Luke is a dick. He is the second biggest Marty Sue in the entire saga after Anakin.

Shit I just remember you have me ignored so this information will never hit you and you will continue to exist in a reality where you know fuck-all about fuck-all.

Ooof.

Malakriss · Jul 30, 2018

Chukzombi said:
sure, you didnt get that vibe when Kylo murders his dad and when luke tries to murder his nephew? no warm and fuzzies?

How about when Rose's sister gives her life on a suicide bomber run against the Dreadnought?

Merrith · Jul 30, 2018

TJT said:
The only thing I liked about TLJ is Kylo's whole, "fuck the Sith, fuck the Jedi, fuck this and fuck you old fucks, I'm just going to do me."

Other than shirtless Kylo for no reason, and the way Snoke died, I think Kylo was perfectly fine to good in TLJ.

DirkDonkeyroot · Jul 30, 2018

Malakriss said:
How about when Rose's sister gives her life on a suicide bomber run against the Dreadnought?

They should have swapped the two actresses, at least there would have been some eye candy for that shit show.

Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker

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