The Fast Food Thread

Not even dabbling in frozen food? Do you have a Trader Joe's nearby? They have the greatest frozen snacks/meals in existence. I can't believe they have made microwave meals so delicious.

Anyone who is trying pizza rolls for the first time, please please please get Totino's. There are a lot of knock-off store brands, but none are as good as Totino's.

Hovering the thread ban button. Thinking about using pizza roll reviews as the entry point

To be fair, the dude is Amish, and wasn't raised with electrical appliances.

Shoulda pizza rolled during Rumspringa

Rollspringa

Lol any Amish who tries pizza rolls during Rumspringa would abandon that bland culture in a heartbeat.

Worst part about Trader Joe's is everyone is in their own little world in there and just wondering around the aisles like its the first time they've ever been there. Also for whatever reason everyone in the parking lot acts the same way and have an intense desire to get ran over.

Same thing at Whole Foods.

"Nobody else exists in the world but me, let me park my cart right in the middle of this aisle sideways so nobody can get past"

Tenks said:

Worst part about Trader Joe's is everyone is in their own little world in there and just wondering around the aisles like its the first time they've ever been there. Also for whatever reason everyone in the parking lot acts the same way and have an intense desire to get ran over.

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I tend to agree but I think it's because the selection is extremely diverse. You have 13 kinds of cheddar cheese, 8 different mixed green combos, 20 different tomato sauces. It can be overwhelming. I'm a TJ's regular and sometimes I find myself staring at a section for five minutes.

My taco bell is giving out a free order of nacho fries with every purchase today. They are exactly what you expect. I would say closest to BK fries with mild seasoning and the regular nacho sauce. Salsa would be better in my opinion. Would try a beefy nacho fry burrito or stacker if they make one.

Ok for an add on item I guess.

Khane said:

Same thing at Whole Foods.

"Nobody else exists in the world but me, let me park my cart right in the middle of this aisle sideways so nobody can get past"

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Khane said:

Shoulda pizza rolled during Rumspringa

Rollspringa

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So been on a streak of being disapointed with most costco frozen asian food items except for the Ling Ling potstickers which are really an american bastardization. Just tonight tried these things I've had in my freezer for like 6 months probably so not sure if they even still have them. But they are these pork and kim chi dumplings, fairly large, like almost as big as a normal donut, bigger than a like hostess mini donut. Had 5 and was fairly stuffed which is odd since I usually can eat half a bag of any of the smaller dumplings.

Looking forward to trying fried as well as the steamed I had. Sadly no sauce included but I've also got a 2 pack of teriyaki sauce from costco I havn't been using since I stopped making DIY ramen years ago. (IE basic bitch store ramen add mixed veggies and boiled egg or other meat + teriyaki sauce)

BrutulTM said:

Control your expectations. I also tried pizza rolls for the first time after reading about them in this thread and I think maybe to enjoy them at the level some people here do they had to be something you ate as a kid.

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I didn't like them as a kid for the same reason I don't like them now. They're massively underwhelming. Also, difficult to cook without bursting everywhere.
They're basically mini calzones/ Stromboli's, which are also stupid foods. Putting good stuff on inside so can't taste them. Instead of tongue rolling around flavor and texture, you get backside of crust, and as I said get blasted with blistering air and weak sauce.
Keep expectations minimal
Pizza bagel bites are nearly superior

I came here not to pick fights tho, Taco Bell pulled me in again I wanted another $1 quesadilla with extra mexi yumyum.
I was surprised by fries.
They're good; good enough; not great.
Crisp yet airy. Cheeto texture and a flavor similar to but different enough from other seasoned fries.
For $1 you get more than an Arby's value fry plus a cup of cheese. It was worth it, but I may just get another quesadilla next time.
They weren't impressive enough to want a nacho fry del grande
5/10
PS: I'd think they'd be good in a burrito like those potato rolls of times past, but such an offering wasn't available and custom creations are not a drive thru's place.

They didn't ring up my extra quesadilla sauce. Without it, the snack lost at least a point in rating. To choose between an unmodified mini beefy quesadilla and a beef stacker, I'd choose stacker 7 times out of 10.

They aren't difficult to cook without bursting everywhere. The trick to a proper pizza roll is to look at the baking directions and then bake them for 3-4 minutes less than they recommend. That way you don't lose any filling and the crust doesn't get overcooked/chewy.

Pizza bagels definitely > pizza rolls, but both are top tier shit food.

Pizza bagels are worse than pizza rolls. You all crazy.

Pizza rolls contain the good stuff safely inside, assuming you can cook them correctly (which isn't hard fyi. I feel like Conefed had trouble cooking the stuffed Doritos without them bursting, too?). Plus they are sized appropriately to be eaten in a single bite, release the burst of flavor all at once. The problem with pizza bagels is that the toppings are all exposed on it, so you take a bite and the whole topping of cheese and meat just slides right the fuck off, leaving you with a slightly tomato-flavored bagel. Trying to eat a pizza bagel in a single bite always results in scalding cheese burning the top of your mouth.

Edit: And I know people will counter with the pain of the burst of lava-hot sauce exploding in your mouth when you eat pizza rolls. However, all you need to do is bite off a corner or two and it will let you ease the sauce out as you chew, so it won't hit you all at once like it will if there is no sauce escape route. Learn2pizza roll bros.