Zapatta
Krugman's Fax Machine
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Tool might eventually release a new album someday
- Thread starter Joeboo
- Start date
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Guest, it's time once again for the massively important and exciting FoH Asshat Tournament!
Go here and give us your nominations!Who's been the biggest Asshat in the last year? Give us your worst ones!
Synj
Dystopian Dreamer
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I have historically been a huge fan of Tool. I can sing and recite every lyric they've ever written up until now.
Look at my avatar. That's Tool.
I have done literally no work in trying to keep up with their latest album. I guess I just lost interest. They fell off my radar and I have not been thirsting for their new shit very much. I knew they were close to something, but I let it not matter to me.
When Maynard said on Rogan that the band was being lazy, I sort of took a lazy approach to them as well.
----
Last week I went golfing with a firefighter buddy of mine. He started playing Pandora on his phone and left it in the cart. Hard Rock, Heavy Rock, or however Pandora does things. I ignored it for the most part.
At some point a few holes later, a song piqued my interest and I listened for a few seconds.
I finally said to him, "This is Tool isn't it?"
He had to look on his phone. He did so and reported back to me, "Yeah it is. The song is called -whatever-"
The song caught my attention and I knew it was Tool without even having to ask. I fucking love Tool's music and I knew right away what I was hearing. It must have been their new song.
As the song played we noticed it was sort of dragging and lagging. I said to my buddy, "Don't worry, Tool will bring it home and make our dicks hard" (Yes I literally said this)
But as the song played..... they never brought it home. They didn't recover with some sort of mind-blowing jam that would make us bang our heads. They simply...faded out. Tool strategically fades out a lot but they always recover with something that makes your dick hard. But whatever song I heard that day did no such thing. It just sort of..... petered out with a whimper.
----
I should probably go look the song up and listen to it with attention, but that first experience of the song was almost embarrassing.
Look at my avatar. That's Tool.
I have done literally no work in trying to keep up with their latest album. I guess I just lost interest. They fell off my radar and I have not been thirsting for their new shit very much. I knew they were close to something, but I let it not matter to me.
When Maynard said on Rogan that the band was being lazy, I sort of took a lazy approach to them as well.
----
Last week I went golfing with a firefighter buddy of mine. He started playing Pandora on his phone and left it in the cart. Hard Rock, Heavy Rock, or however Pandora does things. I ignored it for the most part.
At some point a few holes later, a song piqued my interest and I listened for a few seconds.
I finally said to him, "This is Tool isn't it?"
He had to look on his phone. He did so and reported back to me, "Yeah it is. The song is called -whatever-"
The song caught my attention and I knew it was Tool without even having to ask. I fucking love Tool's music and I knew right away what I was hearing. It must have been their new song.
As the song played we noticed it was sort of dragging and lagging. I said to my buddy, "Don't worry, Tool will bring it home and make our dicks hard" (Yes I literally said this)
But as the song played..... they never brought it home. They didn't recover with some sort of mind-blowing jam that would make us bang our heads. They simply...faded out. Tool strategically fades out a lot but they always recover with something that makes your dick hard. But whatever song I heard that day did no such thing. It just sort of..... petered out with a whimper.
----
I should probably go look the song up and listen to it with attention, but that first experience of the song was almost embarrassing.
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Zapatta
Krugman's Fax Machine
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The song is Fear Inoculum.
I can't believe I am saying this, but this song is doing very little for me.
I can hear every member of the band and they are all doing their jobs well. But the song itself simply doesn't want to kick me in the balls and I want the song to kick me in the balls.
I can't believe I am saying this, but this song is doing very little for me.
I can hear every member of the band and they are all doing their jobs well. But the song itself simply doesn't want to kick me in the balls and I want the song to kick me in the balls.
Hateyou
Not Great, Not Terrible
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Hateyou
Not Great, Not Terrible
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The whole album is like that, it’s sad
I said a few posts ago, my best way to sum up the entire album is ‘it has no balls’. It does everything Tool does except kick you in the nuts. It’s technical, in sync with each other, well produced, but it just never gets there.
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pharmakos
soʞɐɯɹɐɥd
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and this is the essence of what's wrong with this album. lack of erections. for real.
don't bother looking up that song, just go download "7empest," it's the only one that will produce any turgidity.
LachiusTZ
Rogue Deathwalker Box
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God the amount of hipster rustling that resulted from me bring up Clapton was amazing. You guys are some faggots.
I dont listen to Tool and think "Well, Maynard isnt the best vocalist on Earth, this song is TRASH". Clapton has some of the greatest songs ever imo, and none of them require him to be the best guitar player on Earth. Couldnt give a fuck less if he is or isnt. Those songs, the ones I like, he can play as nearly as well at 60 as he could at 40. That was the point of the statement.
I dont want to see a 60 year old Tool, or a 60 yr old Korn, or a 60 year old Disturbed playing heavy rock / alt rock.
Bunch of a hipster faggots. Jesus.
Edit:
Same with Bob Seger, Tom Petty etc. I dont listen to Petty and think "Oh, he isnt Povarati" (whatever that tenors name was), and turn it off. I fucking LOVE Petty, shit is classic. Just like Clapton. You guys can eat a bag a dicks.
I dont listen to Tool and think "Well, Maynard isnt the best vocalist on Earth, this song is TRASH". Clapton has some of the greatest songs ever imo, and none of them require him to be the best guitar player on Earth. Couldnt give a fuck less if he is or isnt. Those songs, the ones I like, he can play as nearly as well at 60 as he could at 40. That was the point of the statement.
I dont want to see a 60 year old Tool, or a 60 yr old Korn, or a 60 year old Disturbed playing heavy rock / alt rock.
Bunch of a hipster faggots. Jesus.
Edit:
Same with Bob Seger, Tom Petty etc. I dont listen to Petty and think "Oh, he isnt Povarati" (whatever that tenors name was), and turn it off. I fucking LOVE Petty, shit is classic. Just like Clapton. You guys can eat a bag a dicks.
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LachiusTZ
Rogue Deathwalker Box
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The music ages well. The musicians age like people.
Old people going to see old people play music that reminds them of when they werent old, isnt exactly a reach. The "show" could be great, the songs might even be played well, but to expect someone in their 60s to have the same vigor as someone in their 30s is dumb. Some music depends more on emotion / vigor than others.
I wouldnt want to see Kevin Gates doing IDGT in his 60s either.
Alex
Still a Music Elitist
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I totally understand that. I largely feel the same way. But now you're going against the very point you were trying to make when it comes to Clapton.
Some of those old fogies are still great though. Paul McCartney is a fantastic show. Peter Frampton, Tom Petty, and John Fogerty are some other older acts that I saw in the past ~10 years that really impressed me as well. Though some are just sad. Like Steve Miller Band and The Who. Not very good.
Some of those old fogies are still great though. Paul McCartney is a fantastic show. Peter Frampton, Tom Petty, and John Fogerty are some other older acts that I saw in the past ~10 years that really impressed me as well. Though some are just sad. Like Steve Miller Band and The Who. Not very good.
Goatface
Avatar of War Slayer
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when i first saw Tool, had no idea who they were. we had to drive like 10 hours to lollapalooza. at the hotel, one of my friends got a paper and entertainment section had a piece, "Tool makes Rage against the machine sound like the bay city rollers" think undertow had been out for a month or 2. For some reason, that stop on lollapalooza only had 1 stage. Tool opened, followed by RATM.
pretty sure i saw them once more in a big warehouse but i saw so many bands during that period don't remember.
pretty sure i saw them once more in a big warehouse but i saw so many bands during that period don't remember.
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I just gave my undivided attention to what is supposed to be the 'best' song on the album, 7empest.
I have been a Tool fan since I was, what? 14-15 years old?
I have to take a pass on this one. I consider this to be weak bland tasteless sauce that has no life. I am being Gordon Ramsey. This sauce is bland. Not enough seasoning. Not enoigh spice. Not enough punch.
Absolutely nothing made my blood boil or my cock hard or my head bang. It was like they almost didn't even care if they did it to me or not. Like a jilted lover who doesn't want to please their partner in bed anymore. Like the exact image Synj posted above me. They're just limp and uncaring. They sound like Tool, but they just aren't Tool anymore.
I hate to say it. I've been to every Tool concert in St. Louis except (ironically) their very first one during Lalapalooza in '95 iirc. I once interpreted and typed out and even printed my version of their lyrics and handed them out to my coworkers who were interested at the time (Pizza Hut). I was way off on some lines, but I did a good job and I put in a good effort to translate a band that never ever printed their lyrics (pre-internet). Remember this was in the 90's when access to Word and a printer were not exactly easy. But it was a passion project of mine to distripute their lyrics to my friends so I did it anyway. My Tool credentials are top-notch.
I suppose we all get old. I suppose Tool did too. We're all human after all. But I can say honestly that I would have preferred them to ride off into the sunset after 10,000 Days. You're rich and famous. Enjoy it, make babies, and live your life. Stop trying to please people like me because, as is evident, you simply can't.
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Louis CK used to have a joke about how we 'lost' Curt Cobain and Jimmy Hendrix and Janice Joplin at such young ages.
They died young and they had 'so much more to give us'!
And he would say, "But maybe they didn't have anymore to give us? Maybe they ran out of shit?"
"Maybe they were done. Maybe they had run out of shit. I myself have considered that I am out of shit. Maybe they were too. Maybe they spared us from thr tragedy of seeing them grow old and lose it."
I have been a Tool fan since I was, what? 14-15 years old?
I have to take a pass on this one. I consider this to be weak bland tasteless sauce that has no life. I am being Gordon Ramsey. This sauce is bland. Not enough seasoning. Not enoigh spice. Not enough punch.
Absolutely nothing made my blood boil or my cock hard or my head bang. It was like they almost didn't even care if they did it to me or not. Like a jilted lover who doesn't want to please their partner in bed anymore. Like the exact image Synj posted above me. They're just limp and uncaring. They sound like Tool, but they just aren't Tool anymore.
I hate to say it. I've been to every Tool concert in St. Louis except (ironically) their very first one during Lalapalooza in '95 iirc. I once interpreted and typed out and even printed my version of their lyrics and handed them out to my coworkers who were interested at the time (Pizza Hut). I was way off on some lines, but I did a good job and I put in a good effort to translate a band that never ever printed their lyrics (pre-internet). Remember this was in the 90's when access to Word and a printer were not exactly easy. But it was a passion project of mine to distripute their lyrics to my friends so I did it anyway. My Tool credentials are top-notch.
I suppose we all get old. I suppose Tool did too. We're all human after all. But I can say honestly that I would have preferred them to ride off into the sunset after 10,000 Days. You're rich and famous. Enjoy it, make babies, and live your life. Stop trying to please people like me because, as is evident, you simply can't.
------------
Louis CK used to have a joke about how we 'lost' Curt Cobain and Jimmy Hendrix and Janice Joplin at such young ages.
They died young and they had 'so much more to give us'!
And he would say, "But maybe they didn't have anymore to give us? Maybe they ran out of shit?"
"Maybe they were done. Maybe they had run out of shit. I myself have considered that I am out of shit. Maybe they were too. Maybe they spared us from thr tragedy of seeing them grow old and lose it."
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I love Tool like I love a brother or a sister, but maybe they are just done. Maybe they have run out of shit.
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Synj
Dystopian Dreamer
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I'm sorry it doesn't work for you bro and I mean that in the sense that it sucks to lose something that you've been enthusiastic about for a long time.
I really like the album. 7empest might be my second least favorite track now after Culling Voices. IMO there are three songs that I listen to consistently, Pneuma, Invincible and Descending in no particular order, with each one taking the #1 spot depending on the day.
The crescendo in Descending starting at about 5:40 and then into the guitar solo at about 7:20 feels really good while driving with the windows open.
Sound the dread alarm! RISE! Mitigate our ruin call us all to arms and order!
A desperate wake up call to society or a fictional call to arms against the dark horde, it's pretty good stuff.
Invincible might be my new fight song against mortality. I'm a young 45, but I'm still 45. This song is another fairy tale to me where it's easy for me to picture it as a movie or just interpret it as the parable (parabol!) it's meant to be. The slow wind up after the story at about 6:44 and just the plodding nature of it I love. When the bass starts going at around 7:40 and eventually takes over around 9:40, it made my wife nauseous in the car. I told her that means it's working! Weapon out and belly in.
Pneuma is just Pneuma and I like the repeating break:
I don't know how to explain it but sometimes I think shit has to be right for where you are emotionally at any given point in your life. Maybe my menstrual cycle just happens to aligned with Maynard's, but this album is doing it for me, and I'm sad that it's not doing it for some other fans (although there are plenty of Tool nuts that seem to be just fine with it).
I think this album is much more self aware and I'm okay with that. Either that or I'm one of those faggots that thought EQ2 was better than EQ (I wasn't).
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