What makes your skin crawl?

lurkingdirk · Oct 20, 2016

Cave Crickets, or whatever the hell they are called. One of my outbuildings is a crap old dirt floor piece of crap in which I store shit that doesn't rust and is rarely used. I pound that door open and listen to these fricking things jumping around. I'm seriously considering just torching the building.

AngryGerbil · Oct 20, 2016

lurkingdirk said:
Cave Crickets, or whatever the hell they are called. One of my outbuildings is a crap old dirt floor piece of crap in which I store shit that doesn't rust and is rarely used. I pound that door open and listen to these fricking things jumping around. I'm seriously considering just torching the building.

Spider Cricket
Cave Cricket
Basement Cricket
Bath Cricket

You would hate my house. This is the #1 pest we have. I read that the Japanese call them 'bath crickets' and this is my exact experience. The bathroom in the basement is where I find most of them. They get trapped in bathtubs and shower stalls. They hop in there in search of food but they can't figure out how to exit them.

Luckily these guys aren't a big deal. They don't bite, don't fly, and aren't a disease vector. They look prehistoric and their defense mechanism is to jump *at* their attacker in order to startle and scare them. Scaring you is literally programmed into them.

What makes my skin crawl is Fleas.

Zaara · Oct 20, 2016

Morbidly obese people. I interact with several 'regulars' due to work, and they're all filthy, disgusting excuses for human beings. That weird brown spackly shit they get around their neck folds, the smell that comes from them being incapable of washing their nether regions, the goddamn paunch that hangs down to the tops of their thighs peeking out of their shirt with the red stretch marks....Ugh.

AngryGerbil · Oct 20, 2016

Zaara said:
Morbidly obese people. I interact with several 'regulars' due to work, and they're all filthy, disgusting excuses for human beings. That weird brown spackly shit they get around their neck folds, the smell that comes from them being incapable of washing their nether regions, the goddamn paunch that hangs down to the tops of their thighs peeking out of their shirt with the red stretch marks....Ugh.

Agreed. These are failed humans as testified by the laws of physics, biology, and economy. They disgust me all the way to my core.

Bandwagon · Oct 20, 2016

chthonic-anemos said:
you can buy snake-proof gear..

AngryGerbil · Oct 20, 2016

Only twice in my life have I ever had a dream within a dream.

Once was about heroin, the other was about fleas.

It was a few months after I had to eradicate a flea infestation in a home I lived in.

I woke up one night in a mortal terror because I awoke from a dream about something frightening to find both of my legs completely covered in blood sucking fleas so much so that I could not see my own skin. I looked down at my legs and saw that they were completely covered in little moving hairs, but instead of them being moving hairs, they were fleas. All of them were attached to me. My moral terror became real and I *SPRUNG* out of bed in a panic and a cold sweat only to realize that I was dreaming about something scary and awoke form that dream to find myself in the 'Flea Dream'. It didn't last long at all. Only about a minute. But it terrified me to my absolute core.

Fuck a flea. I would extinct fleas if I could. I am a Fleaophobe.

AngryGerbil · Oct 20, 2016

Zaara said:
Morbidly obese people. I interact with several 'regulars' due to work, and they're all filthy, disgusting excuses for human beings. That weird brown spackly shit they get around their neck folds, the smell that comes from them being incapable of washing their nether regions, the goddamn paunch that hangs down to the tops of their thighs peeking out of their shirt with the red stretch marks....Ugh.

This is a 750 pound man that requires the state to provide him with a breathing machine and the resources to the move him to his hospital (and back) 3 times a week using 3 diesel trucks and 6 humans.

TrollfaceDeux · Oct 20, 2016

Zaara said:
Morbidly obese people. I interact with several 'regulars' due to work, and they're all filthy, disgusting excuses for human beings. That weird brown spackly shit they get around their neck folds, the smell that comes from them being incapable of washing their nether regions, the goddamn paunch that hangs down to the tops of their thighs peeking out of their shirt with the red stretch marks....Ugh.

u need some men.,

Bubbles · Oct 20, 2016

Noodleface said:
In the pornos when they show the guy going at it from behind and all you see is his ass and balls from some weird under angle

don't forget the camera guy talking. SHUT THE FUCK UP! Your job aint to provide commentary. Also showing the dude's sweaty face after the moneyshot. WHY? Why would you do that? I could produce porn million times better than what is out there

Zaara · Oct 20, 2016

Bubbles said:
don't forget the camera guy talking. SHUT THE FUCK UP! Your job aint to provide commentary. Also showing the dude's sweaty face after the moneyshot. WHY? Why would you do that? I could produce porn million times better than what is out there

Speaking of noises you don't want to hear in porn

Vanderhoof · Oct 20, 2016

About a year ago, a case manager wheeled a fat woman into my office for a psychiatric evaluation. Midway through through the interview, a little red bug hops off her onto my desk.
I ask, "did that just jump off of you?"
She replied, "Probably, we have a lot of bed bugs in our house..."
Both the case manager and the patient knew she had bedbugs but did bother to let me know they were planning on infesting my office with parasites. Il
I threw them out. My nurse practitioner student and I tore my office apart looking for more bugs, but didn't find anything. I made the office manager go to Kmart and buy lice spray so I can hose patients down as necessary.

Randin · Oct 20, 2016

Kiroy said:
wool or scratchy clothing, fucking skeeves me out I can't touch the shit.

I have this to a lesser extent for cloth with a more felt-like texture, with both the touch and sound of it, but the thing that really gets me is the sound of an eraser moving across a blackboard. Shit sets my teeth on edge.

On the subject of crap, having pets cures you of a lot of the squeamishness with regards to shit, but waking up one morning to find that the dog had left a baseball-sized mound of soft serve-consistency diarrhea in the hallway was great fun; closest I've come to vomiting while dealing with animal waste.

Ah, the joys of pet ownership.

Kiroy · Oct 20, 2016

Zaara said:
Morbidly obese people. I interact with several 'regulars' due to work, and they're all filthy, disgusting excuses for human beings. That weird brown spackly shit they get around their neck folds, the smell that comes from them being incapable of washing their nether regions, the goddamn paunch that hangs down to the tops of their thighs peeking out of their shirt with the red stretch marks....Ugh.

Good one.

Lanx · Oct 20, 2016

Bandwagon said:
I also dry heave when I have to pick up dog shit.
God I hate poop.

Try changing your dogs diet, unless you just pick up other dogs poop? but seriously, this could be from funky shit, no pun.

Zapatta · Oct 21, 2016

Lanx said:
Try changing your dogs diet, unless you just pick up other dogs poop? but seriously, this could be from funky shit, no pun.

Add 3-4 Tbsp of canned pumpkin to their diet, all fiber almost no calories. Stiffens their shit right up, makes raking the yard way easier.

OneofOne · Oct 21, 2016

Nail files. I have no idea why, but the few times chicks have tried to ambush me and file a nail, I freak the fuck out (note to self: don't mention this phobia to women you date). It feels weird as shit and makes me want to puke. And again, I have no idea why.

Lanx · Oct 21, 2016

OneofOne said:
Nail files. I have no idea why, but the few times chicks have tried to ambush me and file a nail, I freak the fuck out (note to self: don't mention this phobia to women you date). It feels weird as shit and makes me want to puke. And again, I have no idea why.

Try a glass nail file to get over it. I'm not a metrosexual or anything, i just noticed my wife was using a glass file one day and was like "WTF is that?", tried it, it feels vastly different than the emory board or metal files.

k^M · Oct 21, 2016

Any time TV/movies show people using needle based drugs and/or slitting their wrists.

Saw 2 when the dude falls into the bigass needle pit, makes my skin crawl every time.

Zapatta · Oct 21, 2016

The concept of a Prince Albert, I know a few peeps who are rocking one, to me that is one step closer to cutting the thing off.

Izo · Oct 21, 2016

Wasps. Fucking flying murder machines. Hate 'em.

Search

What makes your skin crawl?

lurkingdirk

AssHat Taint

AngryGerbil

Poet Warrior

Zaara

I'm With HER ♀

AngryGerbil

Poet Warrior

Bandwagon

Kolohe

AngryGerbil

Poet Warrior

AngryGerbil

Poet Warrior

TrollfaceDeux

Pronouns: zie/zhem/zer

Bubbles

2022 Asshat Award Winner

Zaara

I'm With HER ♀

Vanderhoof

Trakanon Raider

Randin

Trakanon Raider

Kiroy

Marine Biologist

Lanx

Zapatta

Krugman's Fax Machine

OneofOne

Silver Baronet of the Realm

Lanx

k^M

Blackwing Lair Raider

Zapatta

Krugman's Fax Machine

Izo

Tranny Chaser