Whats rustling your jimmies?

When people post screenshots of their phone and their phone battery is almost dead. Charge your fucking phone you loser.

I'm the opposite, make it to bed time with 2% battery or pull into gas station with the estimated distance gauge blinking #fuckyeah #efficiency

Apparently I'm not human.

My sister got my dad one of those kits to subit your DNA for whatever reason. I saw him do the deal and put it in the envelope. They sent back they need another sample since the submitted DNA was not human.

Borzak said:

Apparently I'm not human.

My sister got my dad one of those kits to subit your DNA for whatever reason. I saw him do the deal and put it in the envelope. They sent back they need another sample since the submitted DNA was not human.

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Taste like chicken.

Life is always worth living even if it's shifty... sucks your mom is upset at you being there

Write a book, really.

Koushirou said:

So a while back, our apartment notified us about redoing the linen closet and putting in an in-unit washer/dryer combo. Regardless of whether we got the combo or not, they were still going to fuck up the closet so we just decided to get the thing, at a cool $50/mo extra. They ran the pipes, etc. a while back and, while it looked dubious, we reserved judgement until they actually installed the thing. Well, it came in today and this is the result. Fucking thing doesn't go anywhere close to the back of the closet, so it juts out and blocks a third of the entrance to our bathroom now. There's a 14in gap behind the thing for our cats to go back there and do what-the-fuck-ever, which is now going to bug me anytime we have to go out and leave them alone now. Oh, and my short ass now can't reach the only shelf left in the damn closet. The unit itself seems nice enough, but this install job is the most half-assed aids thing I think I've seen. Oh, and now we have a spare door just sitting around in the apartment now. Not sure wtf they want us to do with it.

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I'm rustled just looking at that, I'm sure there's a few violations there you could bring up.

Koushirou said:

Decided that since the dumb washer/dryer is here, might as well try it out! Threw in half a load of towels. 3 and a half hours later, they came out wet. Just going to tell them to get rid of the damn thing.

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LOL some property managers get snagged on volume discount deals and try to foist that shit to their clients. It's usually for energy-efficient windows or fixtures but sometimes shit like that. If it was your landlord's idea then yeah that sucks. But if it was a shit plan by some property management, talk to the owner and they'll prolly rain on the management's parade.

$280,000 in business lost this week due to clueless and ignorant clients. FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU.

Idiots. Sitting at the computer today I heard a car/truck coming that was hauling ass. I got up and walked to the living room to say something about it. By the time I got there it was boom, bam, boom, bam, boom, bam , boom, bam. I figured it was a multi car accident. Single truck in the front yard. Guy crawling out of it it was upside down. I barely ran off the road and was looking to grab my drink and I guess I ran off the road. Speed limit is 45mph here. Counted the marks in the road and apparently he ran off the other side of the road and corrected back and rolled completely over 7 times. Cop was like "You didn't correct and flip 7 times going 45mph". He repeated he was grabbing for a drink. Cop "the only drinks in here are beer cans". Idiot. He missed hitting a 24" pine tree at I'm guessing 70mph by inches. Took the wreckers guys the cop almost an hour just to pick up all the pieces of his truck and load his truck. Cop said he got there quick cause he had just seen the guy hauling ass a few minutes away and was already heading this way.

Idiots lol.

Edit - apparently guy had a tire in the back of the truck. Found tire in a tree about 10 feet up in a tree at the back edge of the property, the road he flipped on was at the front of the 5 acres. Going 45mph, right lol.

People who react like assholes when their wrong actions are pointed out.

At an intersection with a left only and right only lane. Truck is in the right only lane with left turn signal on. I get in the left only lane and almost start to turn when the truck turns left in front of me. I honk my horn (max one second) and he stops in the intersecting lane to turn around in his car and flip me off. He was the incorrect, unsafe dipshit but reacts even more strongly than I did.

Looked like he was going to try and stay stopped to block me (what, he wanted a fight?) but a bunch of cars were coming so he moved on.

I also saw him turn on to the road with the two lanes and there was no reason he couldn't have got in the correct lane. They were marked clearly enough, too, if a bit weathered.

That shit annoys me. You want to get angry over you being a dipshit? Loser.

People on the road, driving their cars get insane.

A few years back when I was between jobs, I did pizza delivery. One night we had the printer that printed the orders was running low on ink. The orders were printed faint, hard to read, so driving down a road I was trying to read the side street's name again holding the bit of paper up to the interior light. Spotted that the street I needed was the one I was at, right there, so had to quickly slow and turn into it, no time to indicate. There had been a car waiting to pull out. If I had been indicating then yeah he could have pulled out several seconds earlier ( really only 5 or 6 seconds ) but he had held his place as he had thought I was going straight on, only to see me turn at the last second.

So 5 or 6 seconds time difference for him. He yells fully aggressively " YOU FUCKING IDIOT!!! "