Why do men keep putting me in the Girlfriend-zone?

Araxen

Golden Baronet of the Realm
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http://literaryreference.tumblr.com/...irlfriend-zone

You know how it is, right, ladies? You know a guy for a while. You hang out with him. You do fun things with him?play video games, watch movies, go hiking, go to concerts. You invite him to your parties. You listen to his problems. You do all this because you think he wants to be your friend.

But then, then comes the fateful moment where you find out that all this time, he?s only seen you as a potential girlfriend. And then if you turn him down, he may never speak to you again. This has happened to me time after time: I hit it off with a guy, and, for all that I?ve been burned in the past,I start to think that this one might actually care about me as a person. And then he asks me on a date.

I tell him how much I enjoy his company, how much I value his friendship. I tell him that I really want to be his friend and to continue hanging out with him and talking about our favorite books or exploring new restaurants or making fun of avant-garde theatre productions. But he rejects me. He doesn?t answer my calls or e-mails; if we?d been making plans to do something before this fateful incident, these plans mysteriously fail to materialize. (This is why I never did get around to seeing the Hunger Games movie. Not to name any names, but thanks a lot, Tom.) Later, when I run into him at social events, our conversations are awkward and lukewarm. This is because the moment we met, he put me in the girlfriend-zone, and now he can?t see me as friend material.

I must say that I find this really unfair. I mean, I?m a nice girl. I have a lot to offer as a friend, like not being a douchebag and stuff. But males just don?t want to be friends with nice girls like me. They can?t help it, I guess; it?s just how they?re wired, biologically. Evolution conditioned our male hominid ancestors to seek nice girls as mates and form friendship bonds only with the other dudes that they hunted mammoths with. It?s true?I know this because I studied hominids in my fifth-grade science class.

So what?s the answer? Should I take up mammoth-hunting in an attempt to appeal to the friendship centers of men?s primal lizardbrains? Should I keep making guy ?friends? and then prevent them from making a move on me by subtly undermining their self-confidence? Should I just give up on those manipulative, game-playing, two-faced bastards once and for all? I don?t know. I mean, I?d really like to have a true friendship with a guy someday, but it?s so hard to trust and respect them when they never say what they mean?and you never know when you might be relegated to the girlfriend-zone.
lol...
 

TrollfaceDeux

Pronouns: zie/zhem/zer
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second part:
"Would you be bothered if your partner was alone with another sex?"
Yes everywhere.
 

zombiewizardhawk

Potato del Grande
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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes?

rihannapostchrisbrown.jpg
 

ohkcrlho

Silver Baronet of the Realm
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if she is "friendzoned",or she is ugly or maybe:

And thenheasks me on a date.

I tell him how much I enjoy his company, how much I value his friendship.I tell him that I really want to be his friend


or maybe both.
 

Dabamf_sl

shitlord
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That video is dumb because it's done in Utah and they have about the least modern attitudes toward relationships in the country.

Guys can be friends with girls under the following scenarios:
1)She's ugly or he's not attracted to her
2)She's attractive but he has a more attractive/more appealing girlfriend
3)She's attractive and makes a good friend but they have a glaring incompatibility for dating

The 3rd case doesn't apply to guys who struggle to meet girls because they by definition want to take whatever they can get. It also requires the guy to be somewhat perceptive and introspective. In my case I'm a calm & laid back guy, and the girls in this category are always kind of wild girls who are really energetic and fun but not overly intellectual and have lots of peaks and valleys emotionally. There may be attraction, but the knowledge that it would never go anywhere and sex would likely ruin the friendship might be a sufficient reason to not act on that attraction.

I've friend-zoned girls who are attractive, and while I always have that thought in the back of my mind that it would be fun to bang, I've never regretted it and came away with some solid friends.
 

Big Phoenix

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The closest a guy can come to being friends with a girl is if its like his best friends wife or something. Aside from that dont kid yourself, theonlyreason a guy stay in contact with a woman is the hope of banging her.
 

Nostrovia_sl

shitlord
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That video is dumb because it's done in Utah and they have about the least modern attitudes toward relationships in the country.
Yeah, because a modern attitude matters and is sooo effective....
0fMtGP6.gif





This...
The closest a guy can come to being friends with a girl is if its like his best friends wife or something. Aside from that dont kid yourself, theonlyreason a guy stay in contact with a woman is the hope of banging her.
 

Dabamf_sl

shitlord
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Um, except I've had plenty of female friends that I had no intention or desire to bang, so that statement is automatically wrong