Ambiturner
Ssraeszha Raider
- 16,043
- 19,530
Batman was much better before he had the super power of deus ex machina. How can someone who got his ass handed to him by Bane supposed to take on Superman outside of shitty writing?
Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice (2016)
- Thread starter Shonuff
- Start date
-
Guest, it's time once again for the massively important and exciting FoH Asshat Tournament!
Go here and give us your nominations!Who's been the biggest Asshat in the last year? Give us your worst ones!
Shonuff
Mr. Poopybutthole
- 5,538
- 791
His Super preparedness and Super Karate works on everyone but street level thugs, but works on demi gods, which is why he one shotted Darkseid (with a Godkilling bullet), but has fought the Joker for the last 50 years (our time).
Duh.
Nester
Vyemm Raider
- 4,978
- 3,183
Lol at "anyone could be batman"
There is only one worlds greatest detective! Being a billionaire is the easiest part of being batman.
I do not consider batman as a man with out superpowers. His superpower is being a genius beyond human levels. He has outsmarted almost every supervillian in the dc universe, including the ridiculous alien ones like Darksied.
This argument is silly as any superhero can beat any other superhero if it fits the storey. Black panthers arm lock is an example of this.
There is only one worlds greatest detective! Being a billionaire is the easiest part of being batman.
I do not consider batman as a man with out superpowers. His superpower is being a genius beyond human levels. He has outsmarted almost every supervillian in the dc universe, including the ridiculous alien ones like Darksied.
This argument is silly as any superhero can beat any other superhero if it fits the storey. Black panthers arm lock is an example of this.
Shonuff
Mr. Poopybutthole
- 5,538
- 791
Half of that came because he had unlimited resources, and started training in these areas from the minute his parents were shot. Imagine what you could do in ten years (if you ever moved from your parents' basement), if you did it full time.
Shonuff
Mr. Poopybutthole
- 5,538
- 791
If you are going to look at a list of ridiculous abilities, look here (12 of Supermans Most Absurd Pre-Crisis Super Powers | Cavalcade of Awesome).
ROFL:
Super kisses that cause amnesia
Super-Shape shifting
Super landscaping
Super-Telepathic Will Control
Super-Mathematics
Super-Ventriloquism
ROFL:
Super kisses that cause amnesia
Super-Shape shifting
Super landscaping
Super-Telepathic Will Control
Super-Mathematics
Super-Ventriloquism
Shonuff
Mr. Poopybutthole
- 5,538
- 791
Sterling
El Presidente
- 13,092
- 8,067
Not sure how calling a lot of the Batman comic shit gay automatically makes people Superman fanbois. A lot of that superpreparedness shit is awful. And people can work hard as fuck and they won't be super fucking ninjas with 150 phds or whatever the fuck in 10 years regardless. Also precrisis Supes is also terrible.
Lanx
<Prior Amod>
- 65,258
- 147,109
batmans super preparedness only comes into play when he's faced against meta-humans, which is like 3 out 12 issues a year. the rest of the 9 he's fighting and solving street or syndicate crimes, or dealing with a villian that is just crazy/smart.
supermans 12 issues a year flip flop between him being
1. an emo alien that can't find love and has puppy eyes for lois or
2. getting it on with superwoman cuz only she can take him on.
with him punch a big space robot or big space alien that just shows up in metropolis square as filler.
supermans 12 issues a year flip flop between him being
1. an emo alien that can't find love and has puppy eyes for lois or
2. getting it on with superwoman cuz only she can take him on.
with him punch a big space robot or big space alien that just shows up in metropolis square as filler.
Valishar
Molten Core Raider
- 766
- 424
He doesn't have unlimited resources, there's only 24 hours in a day and you can only jam so much information into your brain at once before you burn out and retain nothing. An average person with infinite money cannot achieve what Batman does by age 30. Fuck, we're impressed by astronauts with their mere 2 PhDs with peak physical health and test pilot experience.
j00t
Silver Baronet of the Realm
- 7,380
- 7,476
when batman functions like Sherlock Holmes with a black belt and a batmobile, he's really pretty boss. when darksied misses batman with his omega sanction, you immediately cheer and then immediately after that go, "...uh... how?" it's just irritating. batman functions best as a ninja detective. a brilliant analyst who is also an Olympic athlete but nothing more. Batman is Batman not because he's rich, or smart, or any of those things. he's Batman because he's a sociopath. he's just the other side of the coin from his rogue's gallery.
superman functions best when he's put against no-win scenarios because he becomes a symbol for what humanity can achieve. Superman doesn't fight street level thugs because he can't. it would be a waste of his time. that's what the other heroes are for. superman fights guys like darkseid because they represent abstract ideas. but that same quality about him makes him unrelatable.
so you need great writers with the ability to take their time when crafting stories about these guys. but comic book writers don't really have the luxery to write one story every few years. they writer 15 stories a month and they have a deadline for each one. get 'em out or get a new job. so they just sacrifice consistency to get their idea across.
you can look at each character and find loads of REALLY lame stories about them. but you can also find some pretty great stories as well. they are polar opposite heroes and that's why they work well together. sometimes clark needs to be reminded that people don't function they way he does and bruce needs to be reminded that motivation through inspiration can sometimes give a lot better results than motivation through fear.
superman functions best when he's put against no-win scenarios because he becomes a symbol for what humanity can achieve. Superman doesn't fight street level thugs because he can't. it would be a waste of his time. that's what the other heroes are for. superman fights guys like darkseid because they represent abstract ideas. but that same quality about him makes him unrelatable.
so you need great writers with the ability to take their time when crafting stories about these guys. but comic book writers don't really have the luxery to write one story every few years. they writer 15 stories a month and they have a deadline for each one. get 'em out or get a new job. so they just sacrifice consistency to get their idea across.
you can look at each character and find loads of REALLY lame stories about them. but you can also find some pretty great stories as well. they are polar opposite heroes and that's why they work well together. sometimes clark needs to be reminded that people don't function they way he does and bruce needs to be reminded that motivation through inspiration can sometimes give a lot better results than motivation through fear.
Void
BAU BAU
- 9,811
- 11,729
When I complained about Batman, I don't remember saying anything about Superman being any more consistent, realistic, or entertaining. Whether I liked Man of Steel or not is irrelevant, as I've already stated I liked almost all of the Batman movies (the Kilmer/Clooney era is sort of a blur that I try not to think about). I'm sorry you can't separate the two things.
I sort of enjoyed the Howard the Duck movie when I saw it in the theaters, because I had a bit of a crush on Lea Thompson. Would you like to list all of the ways Batman is superior to Howard the Duck now? Because clearly if Howard is absurd, that must mean Batman is awesome and your love of him is vindicated.
I honestly have to believe you're fucking with us, just like you did the last time this discussion came up. Probably Batman vs. Goku or something similar. No one that is truly serious shows us a picture of Batman taking Green Lantern's ring because he's so awesome, and then uses as further proof of his awesomeness a "recording" of Batman explaining how it is impossible to take a ring from a Lantern. That's the clearest example of "because the writer said so" that you could have given us, so you must be fucking with us. Or insane. I prefer to think you're not insane, personally.
Speaking of that recording, I was sort of disappointed with it. Except for his analysis of how to beat himself, and a couple of other easy ones like freezing Plastic Man, they weren't even really good tries at showing how brilliant he is at finding ways to counter everyone. This board could come up with better ways in 15 minutes I'd imagine.
ronne
Nǐ hǎo, yǒu jīn zi ma?
- 8,258
- 7,804
I like how whatever this video is makes that panel of him taking Lanters ring completely impossible. Batgod indeed.
Shonuff
Mr. Poopybutthole
- 5,538
- 791
I honestly think you guys are fucking with me, if you think Superman or Goku could beat Batman. Who can beat a fully prepared Batman? Maybe a pre nerf Black Panther, but that's about it.
Shonuff
Mr. Poopybutthole
- 5,538
- 791
You are 100% right, the writers "have never said so" for Superman. As has been pointed out 200 quintillion tons would split the Earth open, but apparently it's not split open.
