Been a bit since i posted. Proud say that after dieying in juli last year from a moonshine bender that lasted 4 weeks without water or food. My body shut down and in my blackoutness i managed to call the ambulance. All a blur from there until a couple of hour later when i'm walking out to have a smoke. What do i see, well i 0.5 liters of antibac. And yes i know i know, some of them are nasty, makes you puke up with addetives. I spent an hour reserching this perticular brand and all it contained was ethanol. Now a word of warning for all you would be warriors. 98 % OF ANTI BACS come with additives that might kill you or make you very sick. The bottle has to say ethanol, and only ethanol Do not fuck around with anything else. It's put there to make you sick and feel like shit so you dont drink it again.
Now if you are like me under a heavy bender, alkohol is alkohol. (although again, check the contents) And for the love of his Noodly appendage, mix it with alooot fo water. It makes the liquid
white and milky. DONT DRINK IT PURE. IT WILL MAKE A HOLE IN YOUR STOMACH SACK !!!! Shit tastes like its coming from a laboratory, but trust it's alcohol and it gets you fucked up.
And remember don't chug. This shit is 90% alcohol. You don't need much until you do, but start easy so you don't get ethanol poisoning. Take it piano. You will get there.
Down the hatch, i was thrown out for flirting with nurses and slept in a cave the next 4 days because of my nerves and anxiety. It took me 5 months to feel somewhat normal again. My nerves were shot, i didnt dare to go grocery shopping. Fuck opening the mail. I made this post as a harm reduction post incase someone is as desperate as me and starts drinking leftovers from the streets, i know for some that sounds disgusting, but when you get to choose between a granmal and cramps in your whole body that might kill you, the bootle in the streets sounds like an expensive brandy. Hepatit can't make you sick from another persons saliva unless both you and the person have an open mouth cut. It transmits via blood and sex.
Walking to the nearest hospital to get 5 liters of antiback.
I feel ok telling this because iv been on the wagon since juli/august, and Ijust got tired of beeing sick and tired. NO alcohol now and a few spliffs during the week. Mad adhd so cant watch movies, read, jerk off, surf one page ( i got 3 monitors and my head goesthru 3 articles at the time.
Good luck to all of you in the fray. I was a 16 tallboys and hard liquor on top of that every day guy. Breakfast was 6 tallboys before 7. I now alot about what is good to eat, was is good for the craving and i'll be glad to answer anything. Shoot me a tell if you wondering about something. And learned about good supplements for us alkis. They help alot since alcohol depletes the body of essential minerals.
One last tip from a season dumdass. Please have in the back of your head that you need water. Force it in you, and don't go drinking the whole day without food. Now this might not happen right away, but if you keep this up, boozing with no food and minimal water you body will dehydrate and that combined with depletion of serotonin and dopamin. COmbine this with low blood sugar, your nerves totally fucked up and fragile, bright light bother you. You might feel a delirium tremens coming. And equally as worse, a total lockdown of you muscles and nerves. There has been cases of men breaking their arms because the cramps exibit supernatural power and you c a n n o t control it. So heavy painful cramp, combined with delirum tremens and a possible gran mal. Be careful and take precaution. Peace
My parting words. FUCK the 12 step program. It's so out of date and
antiquated . It was written in the 50's The model is not optimal for a human in 2018. In 1948 maybe. But they gave them selves totally over to god. You are shit, powerless, will never be able to enjoy a beer for the rest of your life. Your must see you are a slave to the substance and from now on, every waking minute you have to fight it. I fucking hate it. Was 2 times. 6 weeks each. I left when they asked me to find a higher power. It could be anything. My car, my PS3 if you dont belive in god. It's bullshit
NUmbers dont lie. 30% drop out the first week. Out of those left. 23 % makes a recovery. Rest of them it's wasted on. Addiction is so personal, intervined with your personal traumas, childhood. 12 steps workers work in black or white. You take any form for medication. Even the slightest buzz, oh no your are a lost sold, no power over your affliction. It's such bullshit. /end rant
Be excellent to each other.