Girls who broke your heart thread

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Dabamf_sl

shitlord
1,472
0
Haha I Worf"d his post because it made me laugh a lot.
Antarius said:
Yes, I lowered my standards beyond what I felt comfortable with, but it was like.... "I have to start somewhere, oh well, fuck it I"m going for it".
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I don"t know, 150lbs heavier than you is pretty fuckin enormous, but you got a point. At 27 if you"re a virgin, it"s time to fuck something. Now, you should never at any point mention this to anyone in real life, and if anyone should find out its your duty to kill them so the word doesn"t spread.

That being said, yea, don"t talk to her again, ever. Don"t try to be nice and let her down easy, that is just gonna increase the likelihood that she stalks you, which increases the likelihood that someone you know finds out you fucked a wildabeast, which means you are gonna have to figure out how to evade murder charges. Ignore her, completely. Beating off IS better than having sex with anyone who is likely to fuck with your life (stalk you, spread lies, kill your cat, whatever). I learned that lesson 2 months ago.

And yea, lower your standards means 6s are okay, not -12s. Lower your standards means if you had those pics that Eomer had you"d think "hmm, bad angle, hard to tell what she really looks like, but she can"t be TOO bad, so ok I"ll see her."

Also, thanks for the awesome story. Don"t ever repeat it to anyone.
 
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Dabamf_sl

shitlord
1,472
0
Anyway Eomer, what you paid or didn"t pay for a ticket is irrelevant. The only thing that is relevant is the value of the ticket. If you shat out Coach purses, you shouldn"t give a purse to a girl you just met, because they are worth a lot of money andshe hasn"t earned it yet.You should throw that purse in the garbage before you give it to a girl you just met.

Just like trying to have a date at mcdonalds is a huge DLV, so also is having a first date worth that kind of money. It shows you are either a guy who throws around cash to anyone and also is likely easily manipulated, or a guy so desperate for a girl that he"ll spend any amount of money even on a first date.

But again, what you paid is irrelevant. It"s the value, and only that, that matters.
 
ToeMissile

ToeMissile

Pronouns: zie/zhem/zer
<Gold Donor>
3,359
2,207
Antarius said:
Well I knew about the kid, and the fat part was obvious (assumed that she got fat from the kid, but she told me it was from the meds.. but the info about the crazy came later)...Oh, did I mention she is unemployed.

Anyways, other than being your average 27 y/o virgin (as of last week), I think I have most of my life together at this point.

I look decent, I have good hygiene, I don"t smoke, I"ve got nothing wrong with me mentally (ex: no OCD), I did 4 years in the Air Force as a Cryptologic Linguist, now for the past 16 months I"ve been working as an Air Traffic Controller. Hell, if the only problem a girl had... was that she was a gold-digger like some of the other girls in this thread, I could certainly live with that, hell in fact be happy with that.

Yes, I lowered my standards beyond what I felt comfortable with, but it was like.... "I have to start somewhere, oh well, fuck it I"m going for it". If anything I feel more bad about not sharing the same feelings about her as she does for me.
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I"m curious as to whether or not your virginity was by choice. I want a "now you know the rest of the story" retelling of how this came to be. Something doesn"t sit right. Out with it man.
 
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hootie2_foh

shitlord
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0
I"m curious as to whether or not your virginity was by choice. I want a "now you know the rest of the story" retelling of how this came to be. Something doesn"t sit right. Out with it man.
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Yes seriously, how can someone who served a full term in our armed forces, continue to be a virgin. It sounds Impossible.
Get out there and be all you can be!
 
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Antarius

Lord Nagafen Raider
1,828
15
ToeMissile said:
I"m curious as to whether or not your virginity was by choice. I want a "now you know the rest of the story" retelling of how this came to be. Something doesn"t sit right. Out with it man.
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More like ignorance of what is attractive to women, ignorance of how to flirt with women, a quiet, shy personality, combined with lack of opportunity (don"t go out to bars, preferred spending time indoors raiding (played everquest from 16-21, WoW since closed beta, work odd shifts, work in 99%+ male dominated environments so it"s not like I ever interacted with women at work).

Basically, a lack of knowledge (book smarts), a lack of experience (street smarts), a lack of confidence (I thought I wasn"t really worthy enough to attract women), combined with lack of motivation to change. I started to want to change after reading "The Game" last year. If you go through my post history you can see a couple older posts from february where I first made a profile on the dating websites... but yea, I wasn"t really successful at first. Maybe you could blame it on the fact that... yes, I did have too high of standards (maybe only tried the top 10-20% or so of women) so I finally just got rid of them all together and started to try contacting/flirting with and and all women I came across.

I don"t know how/why you want to psychoanalyze me, but yea, that"s the gist of it. I mean for a while, I had basically even just given up and started to consider myself asexual.... (which I quite positive now that I am not)
 
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Lusiphur_foh

shitlord
0
0
Antarius said:
More like ignorance of what is attractive to women, ignorance of how to flirt with women, a quiet, shy personality, combined with lack of opportunity (don"t go out to bars, preferred spending time indoors raiding (played everquest from 16-21, WoW since closed beta, work odd shifts, work in 99%+ male dominated environments so it"s not like I ever interacted with women at work).

Basically, a lack of knowledge (book smarts), a lack of experience (street smarts), a lack of confidence (I thought I wasn"t really worthy enough to attract women), combined with lack of motivation to change. I started to want to change after reading "The Game" last year. If you go through my post history you can see a couple older posts from february where I first made a profile on the dating websites... but yea, I wasn"t really successful at first. Maybe you could blame it on the fact that... yes, I did have too high of standards (maybe only tried the top 10-20% or so of women) so I finally just got rid of them all together and started to try contacting/flirting with and and all women I came across.

I don"t know how/why you want to psychoanalyze me, but yea, that"s the gist of it. I mean for a while, I had basically even just given up and started to consider myself asexual.... (which I quite positive now that I am not)
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Again, sexual professionals would have been a much better thing to do than throw yourself headlong into this shitpile.

You aren"t getting out of this without a little skin you know ?
 
kegkilla

kegkilla

The Big Mod
<Banned>
11,320
14,739
Antarius said:
Ok, so posting for advice...

Ok, so last week I was a virgin... a 27 y/o virgin....
I started trying out online dating, and I kept hearing advice to "lower my standards" over and over and over...

Well, lower my standards I did... I talked to this girl a couple hours on the phone she plays WoW, then we met up in person, within an hour we were having sex.

The problems: She"s morbidly obese, I"d guess 150 pounds heavier than I am despite being 3 inches shorter. She has a kid from a previous marriage, she is on a metric fuckton of medications because evidently she is crazy (was hospitalized after wanting to kill her kid or something).

Ok, so now what do I do, I"ve known her for about a week and a half now. The problem is: She told me on the 2nd day that she loved me.... I don"t really love her back, nor do I even really want to keep dating her... but then again, sex with her WAS better than beating off...

Advice?
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Eomer

Eomer

Trakanon Raider
5,472
272
Antarius said:
Ok, so posting for advice...

Ok, so last week I was a virgin... a 27 y/o virgin....
I started trying out online dating, and I kept hearing advice to "lower my standards" over and over and over...

Well, lower my standards I did... I talked to this girl a couple hours on the phone she plays WoW, then we met up in person, within an hour we were having sex.

The problems: She"s morbidly obese, I"d guess 150 pounds heavier than I am despite being 3 inches shorter. She has a kid from a previous marriage, she is on a metric fuckton of medications because evidently she is crazy (was hospitalized after wanting to kill her kid or something).

Ok, so now what do I do, I"ve known her for about a week and a half now. The problem is: She told me on the 2nd day that she loved me.... I don"t really love her back, nor do I even really want to keep dating her... but then again, sex with her WAS better than beating off...

Advice?
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This could turn it around for Arbitrary!

Dabamf said:
But again, what you paid is irrelevant. It"s the value, and only that, that matters.
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Haha, so I guess as usual the board is united in their disapproval. Ah well, we shall see how it goes tonight. I ended up not calling her last night, went out for some beers with some buds unexpectedly and more or less forgot. When I did remember, it was almost midnight, so I sent her a text saying I"d gone out for beers, that I"d call her tomorrow and to let me know if any particular time works. I was careful not to say the sorry word, which tends to come so naturally ("oh hey sorry, but..."), I just stated why and said I"d call her tomorrow. She texted back this morning saying no worries and to call after 11.

This whole thing is off to a great start!
 
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Lusiphur_foh

shitlord
0
0
Eomer said:
This could turn it around for Arbitrary!



Haha, so I guess as usual the board is united in their disapproval. Ah well, we shall see how it goes tonight. I ended up not calling her last night, went out for some beers with some buds unexpectedly and more or less forgot. When I did remember, it was almost midnight, so I sent her a text saying I"d gone out for beers, that I"d call her tomorrow and to let me know if any particular time works. I was careful not to say the sorry word, which tends to come so naturally ("oh hey sorry, but..."), I just stated why and said I"d call her tomorrow. She texted back this morning saying no worries and to call after 11.

This whole thing is off to a great start!
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Stop overanalysing this shit bud. Seriously

Just say its a ticket you had free and you were going anyways. Let her reach her own conclusions.
 
Brad2770

Brad2770

Avatar of War Slayer
5,221
16,412
Not much detail into the trip to the "The Rapist", but I wanted to say that I seem to be answering a lot of my own questions.

Anyways, for the most part, I have been leaving my ex alone. It has been over 2 weeks since I have seen her and I have only talked to her a couple of times (through text) since then.

I see where therapy comes in and how it can help, but it still hasnt soothed what I feel like I am losing. I still do not feel like I am losing a cheating bitch that is not worth my time. I feel like I am losing my family. I have seen my son 3 times in the last 2 weeks (partially because of the new arrangements and partially because of work- My new assistant already got fired... heh). My biggest thing I am noticing is that I am actually starting to think before I act. So, if this stuff doesnt help me get over the past, maybe it will at least help me better handle the future.

I am actually anxious to go back. I feel like I learned a lot during my session (and some of it seems like common sense). I am curious as to what more might be discussed.


I work alone. I spend a majority of my days alone. There are times that I can go 4 or 5 days without seeing anyone. I might talk to a person or two on the phone, but my human interaction is very limited.

I feel very alone. I know that is a big portion of my problems. I havent talked about that yet, but things that were said during my session made me start thinking about other things in my life besides my ex.
 
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Whyme_foh

shitlord
0
0
Antarius said:
Stuff
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Well, first off, I would take the consensus advice of not ever speaking to this chick again. Any girl (or guy for that matter) that professes her love to you after 2 dates is seriously fucked in the head - she is trying to tie you down ASAP. I"d also quit the online dating scene; that climate is not particularly favorable to your current situation.

Honestly it sounds to me like the problem is not so much your personality or your looks but the fact that you have neglected to put yourself in the right position to meet and find girls. I don"t mean you should become a bar rat, or one of those creeps at the book store... My advice to you is to take up some type of activity - Yoga classes, dance lessons, even running in the park (if you own a dog even better). All of those activities will 1) enrich your life 2) get you fitter and 3) put you in great positions to meet women. Dancing is my personal favorite.

Now once you"ve put yourself in favorable positions, you need to work on actually approaching and talking to women. I would make it a point of striking up a conversation with every girl you meet. Your goal should be to try and make her laugh in the first 20-30 seconds. Nothing really has to come of the conversation - just make them laugh and move on. Over time your confidence will get higher and you will never again have to stoop to wildebeest status girls for sex (and I"ve been there, I know the feeling).
 
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Rathmort_foh

shitlord
0
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Brad: Good to hear it. Keep it going, especiall the part about thinking before you act. Bear in mind though, it will help you to sort things out in your head, but its not going to make everything magically wonderful by itself. Great to see you"re finally starting to actually *think* about things, keep posting after your sessions.
 
Brad2770

Brad2770

Avatar of War Slayer
5,221
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Mystery method doesnt have shit on this guy after being told the woman has a boyfriend:

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Tarrant

Tarrant

<Prior Amod>
16,009
9,442
Well me and the ex are just that....ex"s. She decided for now she wants to pursue shit with this other guy, shes goin out to bang em this weekend.

Whatever at least I can say I tried and I came out a better person from it all. Yeah it sucks but -meh-

Started talking to a girl on OKCupid last night, exchanged a few messages her first comment was how much out profiles were alike so that"s cool I suppose.

So I get to start over from square one and am now realize I live in a city where I don"t know anyone and have no family...all my friends were me ex"s friends it seems and migrated back to her after our breakup. Fuck em I guess.

Been talking to a girl from back home too, she"s pretty cool, she calls me every day just about, I"m not for long distance shit but can"t say I would be opposed to something if an ideal arrangement was worked out.

Like i said before, time to start over from square one. I"m getting told old for this shit.
 
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Dabamf_sl

shitlord
1,472
0
Brad2770 said:
Not much detail into the trip to the "The Rapist", but I wanted to say that I seem to be answering a lot of my own questions.

Anyways, for the most part, I have been leaving my ex alone. It has been over 2 weeks since I have seen her and I have only talked to her a couple of times (through text) since then.

I see where therapy comes in and how it can help, but it still hasnt soothed what I feel like I am losing. I still do not feel like I am losing a cheating bitch that is not worth my time. I feel like I am losing my family. I have seen my son 3 times in the last 2 weeks (partially because of the new arrangements and partially because of work- My new assistant already got fired... heh). My biggest thing I am noticing is that I am actually starting to think before I act. So, if this stuff doesnt help me get over the past, maybe it will at least help me better handle the future.

I am actually anxious to go back. I feel like I learned a lot during my session (and some of it seems like common sense). I am curious as to what more might be discussed.


I work alone. I spend a majority of my days alone. There are times that I can go 4 or 5 days without seeing anyone. I might talk to a person or two on the phone, but my human interaction is very limited.

I feel very alone. I know that is a big portion of my problems. I havent talked about that yet, but things that were said during my session made me start thinking about other things in my life besides my ex.
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I"m legitimately happy to read this post. Sometimes when you do some stupid shit and realize the error of your ways it causes you to withdrawal if you"re a certain type of personality. I do it, haven"t really been excessively social (except for when I force myself in order to avoid being a hermit) for over a month after I had sex with that american girl disaster. More calm, more boring, but not necessarily bad as long as you don"t let it perpetuate for too long and turn into long term withdrawal or depression.

Anyway, good luck.
 
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