Girls who broke your heart thread

Keep talking, fuck Arkk. Why would talking about the sessions where you talk about your life be bad thing? If there"s something you want to discuss, have at it. Hell, use this thread like LJ if it helps.

I"d take boring over agonizing any day of the week and twice on Sunday.

Love is boring. Happiness is boring. I can think of a hundred things worse than being in a boring relationship, I have other things to do with my time and energy than do triage on crazy. Boring is good. Boring beats the hell out of the excitement of your wife getting cancer, someone cheats, your kid dies. Or not getting laid for several months in Korea, that"s real exciting.

I wouldn"t trade boring for anything.

Alright, so I tried this online dating site stuff out and started on okcupid.com. It was shorter and easier to fill out than plentyoffish, but definitely a smaller site. Anyway, here"s my first / boring attempt at a profile:OkCupid.com: csbell / 25 / m / straight / Baltimore, Maryland

Also, I have these "matches" that I"m supposed to message but I don"t really know what I"m supposed to say. Any suggestions?

One of my friends uses a stupid DMV line. Most of the women seem to have a photo of themselves in a car, so he starts it off like a survey of why she would- fuck it, getting him to copy and paste it to me.

So here it is:

Hi.

I work for the Department of Motor Vehicles and we are conducting a survey on women that have pictures of themselves on their dating profiles, but obviously taken in a car and behind the steering wheel.

Were you driving at the moment that this picture was taken?
How fast were you going?
Was your gas tank on full or empty?
Had you stopped for a tasty Bagel before this picture was taken?
How many points was the old lady on the walker worth?
How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
Do you think 80"s rock is still "In"?
Are you taking this seriously?

If you could please fill out and return this survey form, it would be greatly appreciated. Thank you for your time.

He does other shit too (and looks better than me) so, he gets a lot more responses. He changes the questions up based on their profile.

If they answer the questions and then ask him questions, he responds to them. If they answer, but dont ask. He doesnt try anymore.

EDIT- he just emailed over what the woman responded to that.

Were you driving at the moment that this picture was taken?
~ Every Smart-Aleck fiber in my being wants to say I was driving 110 miles an hour with my knees. But the truth is that I have an aversion to taking pictures or texting while driving. So, I was at a red light in the car pic with the beige seats; I was in a Target parking lot with the black seat. Only time I remember to take my picture.

How fast were you going?
~ Faster than fossilization; but slower than a snail.

Was your gas tank on full or empty?
~ Couldn"t tell you. But I suspect it wasn"t empty.

Had you stopped for a tasty Bagel before this picture was taken?
~ Nope, but probably had a starbucks in the car.

How many points was the old lady on the walker worth?
~ Not nearly enough. They just don"t move fast enough!

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
~ More than me, less than you?

Do you think 80"s rock is still "In"?
~ Was it ever out?

Are you taking this seriously?
~ Only semi....

kegkilla said:

they dont ram a qtip up your penis, they swab a litte bit around the hole. its really nothing to worry about.

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Are you speaking from experience?

If you actually have Chlamydia, the test is the least of your concerns. Feeling like you"re pissing fire is something you"ll probably want to avoid!

TheCutlery said:

Yeah, pretty much. Got laid last night, wanna know how much effort it took me? The effort to get up off the couch and walk to the bedroom. Got a blowjob on Saturday, got some anal on Sunday, I tell ya, it"s a brutal existence. Probably get laid tonight too. Don"t have to buy her anything, don"t have to take her out, don"t have to play stupid little games to make sure she"s still my girlfriend, I might have to give her a backrub, but that"s a small price to pay.

You? You can"t even kiss your bitch without it being culturally unacceptable.

Does it get boring getting the same piece of ass every night? Sometimes, sure. But that"s when you start doing new shit to spice it up. Buy some toys, get a camera, start pushing the envelope. And honestly, STD"s scare the shit outta me. You know what the chlamydia test entails? Ramming a Q tip down your junk. No thanks, you know what? I"ll just keep on doing the one woman I KNOW is clean. You guys can"t trust a woman to stay sane long enough for a month long relationship, you think she"s being honest about her diseases or lack thereof? Fuck.

And I didn"t say I was infinitely wise for doing what I did. I said I saw a woman who wasn"t crazy, who was capable of actually rationalizing decisions instead of being an impulsive cunt, and who actually wanted me...I did what I felt was the right decision, and I"m grateful I did. Does it work out for everyone? Of course not, we"ve already outlasted several marriages/relationships, and we"ve surpassed all of that "You guys will never last 2 years" bullshit we heard when we got married. Is it right for everyone? No. But if it is, why pass it up based upon what everyone else thinks you should do?

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Dude, you have to use Mystery"s Method, and analyze her, and and... openers and closers, and counters, and manipulations methods... and and...

+1.

This thread is a bunch of single guys not listening to the married guys, and then complaining when their perpetually single or serial-monogamist friends give them horrible advice that magically doesn"t fix anything. Uh, Dabamf may have some good ideas on how to get laid frequently, but nothing about real relationships.

Draz said:

Are you speaking from experience?

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Is getting regularly tested a bad thing?

It takes 2 seconds, hurts a little the first time u pee afterwards and then you get peace of mind.

Everyone should get tested every 6 months.

arkk123 said:

Is getting regularly tested a bad thing?

It takes 2 seconds, hurts a little the first time u pee afterwards and then you get peace of mind.

Everyone should get tested every 6 months.

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.

[LVC]DeGrassi said:

Hey at least he can grab some tits right ? And not get rejected ...... right ? You want to talk about boring ... look at your last 20 posts about the azn bitch.

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Yea, living in a polar opposite culture and having to relearn everything you know about people and dating, being constantly challenged by things you used to take for granted, and developing new perspectives about everything is REALLY boring man. While its often frustrating and irritating, there"s no question I"m, as a person, getting way more out of getting denied tit grabs than I would if I were married right now.

Looks like a lot of people took that comment personaly. I"m not talking shit or saying his way is worse. If he"s happy being married from 19, good for him. I just saw a little exaggerated "I want that" "That"s awesome you"re so lucky" and wanted to offer a little opposite perspective. That DOES seem boring to me to be married all throughout my 20s, and I"d guess for most guys as well. I don"t know a single person who got married that early and is happy (I"m not saying whatshisface isn"t happy). Eventually, yea in my 30s I want boring>frustrating any day of the week. In fact even at 25 I"m starting to miss less and less the wild shit in college & the year after that. But I would never trade all that for married life no matter the consequences.

Of course if you spent your 20s constantly confused and terrible with women, married life certainly would be better, and you really have no idea where I"m coming from. But guys who are, or have learned to be, decent with women don"t usually think so.

GrobbeeTrull2.0 said:

This thread is a bunch of single guys not listening to the married guys, and then complaining when their perpetually single or serial-monogamist friends give them horrible advice that magically doesn"t fix anything. Uh, Dabamf may have some good ideas on how to get laid frequently, but nothing about real relationships.

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Actually most of what I say applies to real relationships. Unless you mean "real" relationship advice to be "oh buy her flowers and shower her with affection" in which case no, I don"t have advice on how to make your woman think that you don"t deserve her. My advice is strictly catered to making a woman think--no...KNOW--that she has to earn the man just as much as the man has to earn her.

Dabamf said:

Actually most of what I say applies to real relationships. Unless you mean "real" relationship advice to be "oh buy her flowers and shower her with affection" in which case no, I don"t have advice on how to make your woman think that you don"t deserve her. My advice is strictly catered to making a woman think--no...KNOW--that she has to earn the man just as much as the man has to earn her.

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I think by real relationships he means ones were you live and work together day in and day out smelling each others" shit for some significant period of time. Say, six months or more. I might be wrong in my assumption. It also still may or may not apply to your knowledge base. But his posting made me think of the shallow series of dating events that tend to get depicted in places like TV sitcoms and most of this thread. Those would not count under the "real relationship" definition.

Draz said:

Are you speaking from experience?

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theres a bad thing about being safe and getting tested?

Fuck you and the goddamn homohorse you rode in on.

ToeMissile said:

I think this is something that doesn"t come up often enough in this thread. Functional/successful/healthy relationships aren"t one sided and they don"t "just happen", both parties should want to improve for each other and as a couple. Or maybe I"m just a dirty hippy.

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This, this and a thousand times this.

A lot of the unhappy guys in this thread are "Putting the pussy on a pedestal" and chasing it just a little too hard. Some random internet bint doesn"t call back ? Find another one, they aren"t exactly rare. It"s annoying as f when it happens but you should just view it as a bullet dodged.

If you ever find yourself in the situation of having spent 30 minutes poring over what a one line text message "means" then you are giving too much of yourself and not expecting enough in return. A lot of "The Game" stuff actually tries to address this in a roundabout way. You should project a little aloofness until said male/female earns your consideration at a deeper level. Relationships can"t be rushed peeps.

The Chlamydia test doesn"t involve ramming a q-tip up your dick... it is a piss test.


I had to get it in college bc my ex girlfriend said I gave it to her. Test was negative... turned out her current boyfriend cheated on her, got it and gave it to her. hahaha