Girls who broke your heart thread

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brekk

brekk

Dancing Dino Superstar
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Grayson Carlyle said:
Are you guys retarded? "Head shit" is not Mitch, "Cranium Accessories" is. Try to follow along.

-edit- Alright, let me explain... I was making fun of Salshun for missing the Hedberg reference... you two goofs were doing what exactly? Contemplating your navels?
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He got the Hedberg reference. You got half of it.

The whole joke is saying Cranium Accessories and then after the audience laughs saying they"re a smart audience, because for some crowd"s he has to dumb it down to "head shit"

All the fail is on your part.

Edit: This is the actual Hedberg bit in question

I was at a bar once, and no one was talking to me "cuz I just did a show, and I ran into a guy, and instead of saying "excuse me" he said "get the hell out of my way,", so I said "Go to hell", and I ran away. He caught up to me, he had on a hat, a nose ring, an eybrow ring, a goatee, a tongue ring, and 3-earings. He said "Hey man, you have a lot of nerve," and then I said "Hey man, you have a lot of cranium accessories." (crowd laughs) You guys are a smart crowd, when I do the dumber crowds, I have to say "Hey man, you have a lot of shit on your head!"
 
C

Czaza_foh

shitlord
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brekk said:
um?
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I think he"s trying to say that she is pregnant with twins, the farther apparently a Christmas gnome.
- Also she has a tattoo of a ram on her vagina.

Personally all that aside I don"t think she is undoable or whatever. But she is somewhat of a slob according to her pictures.
 
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Sharmai_foh

shitlord
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Remember guys there is nothing wrong with a chick who has kids as long as you have no intention of staying with her. Chicks with kids make great friends with benefits since they often think their real estate has gone down after having a kid (which is true)

Also remember the rules for creating FWB"s
1. Don"t buy them anything. Gift"s make them expect more gifts and expect a more serious relationship.
2. Don"t take them home.
3. You call them they don"t call you
4. Date"s must be short.
5. No your not interested in meeting their kid, baby sitting, hearing about their birthday.
6. No you don"t want to hear about their emo problems
7. No coming around during that time of the month


These rules are strictly for FWB"s.
 
Aychamo BanBan

Aychamo BanBan

<Banned>
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Czaza said:
I think he"s trying to say that she is pregnant with twins, the farther apparently a Christmas gnome.
- Also she has a tattoo of a ram on her vagina.

Personally all that aside I don"t think she is undoable or whatever. But she is somewhat of a slob according to her pictures.
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Hahah! I loved that photo!!!
 
Aychamo BanBan

Aychamo BanBan

<Banned>
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Sharmai said:
Remember guys there is nothing wrong with a chick who has kids as long as you have no intention of staying with her. Chicks with kids make great friends with benefits since they often think their real estate has gone down after having a kid (which is true)

Also remember the rules for creating FWB"s
1. Don"t buy them anything. Gift"s make them expect more gifts and expect a more serious relationship.
2. Don"t take them home.
3. You call them they don"t call you
4. Date"s must be short.
5. No your not interested in meeting their kid, baby sitting, hearing about their birthday.
6. No you don"t want to hear about their emo problems
7. No coming around during that time of the month


These rules are strictly for FWB"s.
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Last night I ended up making a FWB with the very first myspace girl I met up with. We had never fucked, so I never mentioned her here. She had a kid. I had texted her that I wasn"t interested in seeing her anymore, and she still keeps texting me over a week later. And started saying stuff like how bad she wants to get naked with me. So I finally hung out with her last night after our "office party."

Anyway she starts saying how she likes to give head, because she likes having control on the guy, so I brought her in my room and she sucks my dick, then we rest and she asks if I want her to do it again. So of course I say yes. She then says "I just love the fact that I have the power to make a guy come with my blowjobs." In my head, I"m thinking "Are you fucking retarded? I could wrap my dick in a slice of bread, jack off, and still come within a minute."

Anyway
 
tyen

tyen

EQ in a browser wait time: ____
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haha thats lulz. Get some nudies out of her. Or get some pics of this hoe with your camera while she is passed out naked


loool
 
T

The Ancient_sl

shitlord
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aychamo_aycono said:
She then says "I just love the fact that I have the power to make a guy come with my blowjobs." In my head, I"m thinking "Are you fucking retarded? I could wrap my dick in a slice of bread, jack off, and still come within a minute."
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This is the first thing you"ve said that has given me a chuckle.
 
Tarrant

Tarrant

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The one I"ve been talking to is pretty decent, but unlike you guys I don"t have the looks it takes to get with most of the women you"ve posted pics of. Personality only gets you so far the chick has to let it get that far to begin with for it to even happen.

Small update with me, I sent her a small message yesterday letting her know I hoped her kid was feeling better and when she wanted to set up a time to go out to let me know. I hadn"t called due to the advice here, which I think was the right thing and I didn"t send her any messages for a bit either until yesterdays.

Well she responded pretty positively and told me to give her a call anytime even just to shoot the shit and we may be goin out on Sunday evening.

As usual, will give updates as they happen and always open to tips and advice due to my retardedness when it comes to doing this shit again after so long.
 
V

Vatoreus Malfost_sl

shitlord
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For the people who consider kids a strike. I can completely understand it and I don"t think less of you, it"s just I can understand how it would suck to have that considered against you. I do however think that it"s a much bigger problem for single mothers rather than single fathers, as women are MUCH more inclined to love a kid no matter what and see them as a ton of fun. That"s been my experience at least, I"ve only run into one chick that I talked to that said she wasn"t interested because I had a kid.

So, no, I don"t think less of you guys who don"t want to deal with it, because I honestly wouldn"t want to either, which kinda sucks to say, but I also don"t expect any women to deal with my kid and don"t blame them for kindly telling me no thanks because of it. I mostly worry about my ex and hope she doesn"t have too difficult of a time finding happiness.

Also, update!

Things are progressing very nicely with the girl. She really does seem like my type in every single way, so I"m very hopeful for how this will turn out. She"s coming up to visit me the week after New Year"s for a week and we plan on just hanging out watching zombie movies and playing with my kid, who she absolutely adores (lucky me!). The thing is, depending on how shit develops over the next few months, I might be taking a HUGE chance in my life once I"m out and on my own again. She"s moving to back to Cali (Sacramento) to open her tattoo parlor she"s been waiting on because of renovations and has invited me to come with her to work/live. I know all the inherent risks and shit coming with this, but I know I"ll get an earful from you fine ladies/gents anyway.

I"ve always been a big risk taker and it"s always paid off for me in some way and I plan to continue living life this way. You don"t get big pay offs without taking big chances and this chick is definitely something special. Like I said though, this is all dependent on how shit goes for the next few months, because I"m not going anywhere until my son goes back to live with his mom.

At the very least, I"ll come out of it with a hell of a story and experience and at the most, I"ll be happy for the rest of my fucking life. Win win in my opinion.
 
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