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Dacianprick King In The North

Dacianprick King In The North

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Actually, in the end Bran manages to communicate with his father through the weirwood tree. Stops himself from falling from the tower.
Ned kills Littlefinger and Cersei and all the blonde incest kids. Danerys marries Robert B instead because Ned tips him off about the Dragons. Jon stills goes up North to join the nights watch, finds out his mother was actually Kat all along but was really Maester Luwin's bastard. And Theon keeps his dick.
Fin
 
Chukzombi

Chukzombi

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Chris_sl said:
It's the ending of another "magnum opus" by a famous author
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lets never discuss that ending again
 
bixxby

bixxby

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Dacianprick_sl said:
Actually, in the end Bran manages to communicate with his father through the weirwood tree. Stops himself from falling from the tower.
Ned kills Littlefinger and Cersei and all the blonde incest kids. Danerys marries Robert B instead because Ned tips him off about the Dragons. Jon stills goes up North to join the nights watch, finds out his mother was actually Kat all along but was really Maester Luwin's bastard. And Theon keeps his dick.
Fin
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but...what about Stannis and Victarion !?
 
Dacianprick King In The North

Dacianprick King In The North

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bixxby_sl said:
but...what about Stannis and Victarion !?
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Stannis remained on Dragonstone, until the wedding of Daenarys and Robert. Robert sends the Dragons and an army led by him and Stannis to destroy the rest of the Lannisters. Then gives Stannis the Rock as thanks for not killing his now wife when she was a baby. Tyrion remains at the Rock as the court jester but Tysha returns as a cook and they live together now on a farm. He quit drinking but she drinks to dull the pain of her battered chapped pussy.

When the Crow's Eye comes back, Baelon still dies, but Theon comes back with ships from the Stark army to claim the seastone chair. Victarion supports Theon and they kill the Crow's Eye. Theon turns the Iron Islands into a brothel theme park for the rich lords of Westeros. Victarion, doesn't really support the transition and takes a fleet with him to Valyria and find that there are no demons there but the real danger is that Mermen have built a city on the water called Etlantys. They are about to lay siege to the whole place when he meets a mermaid and they fall in love and have squid babies.
 
iannis

iannis

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Eyashusa_sl said:
George R.R. Martin: Fuck You If You Think I Won't Finish the Series
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Nah, that fucker is gonna go into a diabetic coma sometime before he finishes the current not yet completed book. The fact that he uses the words "Magnum Opus" to self-describe these books is pretty much all the proof you need.

Rage against the truth tellers, George.

I mean, do you think Hemmingway ever called up his publisher, "Here's another American Masterpiece for you!" And Hemmingway was a stone cold dick.
 
khalid

khalid

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Iannis_sl said:
Nah, that fucker is gonna go into a diabetic coma sometime before he finishes the current not yet completed book. The fact that he uses the words "Magnum Opus" to self-describe these books is pretty much all the proof you need.

Rage against the truth tellers, George.

I mean, do you think Hemmingway ever called up his publisher, "Here's another American Masterpiece for you!" And Hemmingway was a stone cold dick.
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Dude, stop it with your silly hate campaign against GRRM. We get it, you dislike him or at least pretend to hate ASOIAF to be hipster.

He is saying it is his Opus because he knows it will be the work he will be known for the rest of his life. There is nothing arrogant at all about that. He has lamented the fact that so few fans of ASOIAF care about his other stuff.
 
Dacianprick King In The North

Dacianprick King In The North

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Eyashusa_sl said:
What about Patchface?
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Turns out Patchface is Gerion Lannister. He went missing because of a mutiny with his slave crew when he tried to go to Valyria. They put him in chains and tried to sail to the Summer Isles when they were captured by Slavers and taken to Volantis. Gerion was made a slave himself but schemed to find a way back to Westeros. The shipwreck still happens and he goes half Hodor.

When Stannis goes to take his place at the Rock, Tyrion recognizes him and then they have loads of fun adventures together years down the line as two Jesters in the West. This is going to be the theme of GRRMs next series of books, much like Dunk and Egg. Eventually they find Brightroar, it was in a broom closet in the Rock the whole time.

Jon Arryn lives, retires as hand, and throws Lysa out the moon door with little Robert. Actually Little Finger's kid. He marries Old Nan and
they have 7 kids. Big and strong, but all they can say is Rodoh.

Ygritte settles down with Wun Weg Wun Dar Wun, but the poor giant can't keep up with her sexually and eventually dies mid-coitus. She discovers she's actually a greenseer, which is why she was always telling Jon he knew nothing, she was actually looking into the future. She gets contacted by the 3 eyed crow, but she trips on a root and bangs her head on a rock and dies.

Sam goes up to the night's watch, looses a lot of weight, runs away and kills Craster and takes all of his wives for himself.
 
Sylas

Sylas

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spinnaker_sl said:
I thought Cat had them sent back to the Winterfel crypts? Am I remembering that wrong?
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They are in the possession of Barbrey Dustin who harbors a grudge against both Catelyn and Eddard Stark and refuses to allow his bones to reach winterfell.

edit: ok i remembered wrong, they are in the neck. if they ever leave the neck they will be in her possession.
 
Dacianprick King In The North

Dacianprick King In The North

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Sylas_sl said:
They are in the possession of Barbrey Dustin who harbors a grudge against both Catelyn and Eddard Stark and refuses to allow his bones to reach winterfell.
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She actually wants to get her hands his bones to feed them to her dogs because she was pissed at Ned for not bringing her dead husbands bones back after the war.
Tyrion sent them back but no one officially knows where they are now.

Eddard Stark - A Wiki of Ice and Fire

Barbrey Dustin, who once aspired to marry Brandon before he was betrothed to Catelyn, mentions to Theon Greyjoy that she blames Eddard for the death of her husband Willam Dustin.She tells Theon that if she ever discovers the location of Eddard's bones, she will never allow them to be buried in the crypts of Winterfell along with his ancestors, in revenge for Eddard's failure to return her husband's bones to her.[28]
 
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