Forgot about this thread for a bit. Not psychotic or clumsy. I do have "bipolar tendencies" and angry mood swings (though those only seem to happen when I see an MSNBC thumbnail on Youtube).
Main thing I wanted to take something for was productivity. Anything that can help me get shit done would be amazing, because there are days where I feel like I'm made of lead and it's nearly impossible to get things done. Then other days I'm completely hyper and can get a ton done, but as I've gotten older those days have gone from 70% of the time to like 5% of the time.
Adderall definitely helped me get things done. Either 5 MG regular or 10 MG XR. At first I liked the regular since it comes with a nice high that doesn't interfere with any faculties. Then I liked the XR because, even though the high is less pronounced, it seemed to be much more "level" for my mood whereas regular would make me a bit too hyper. Then I found that XR wouldn't let me sleep AT ALL on some nights. So now I like regular again. Not that it matters, not being prescribed it anymore because they wanted to try other stuff.
I'm about 90% sure that seroquel was something I took briefly a few years ago and it gave me incredibly bad restless leg syndrome. Absolutely debilitating "can't sleep at all" need to move around. One of the most uncomfortable things I've ever had to deal with, even if it was only for a day. It might have been something else but, again, 90% sure it was seroquel. I told the current doc that I'm good on seroquel but he insisted he send a script my way anyway in case I want to try it. Jesus.
Never tried the abilify. I guess I'll give that a whirl some time soon. Maybe it'll be a huge help, maybe it'll fuck me up. Who knows, these doctors seem to just throw darts at a wall. From looking around the nets, it does sound like abilify is pretty good. I just want my "days where I'm useless and do the bare minimum" to be more normal and high-functioning.
And yeah, they REALLY want to give people antidepressants. It's ridiculous.