Noodleface
A Mod Real Quick
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Yall talking about open offices and I don't even sit in my cube. I code in the lab next to several hundred servers blasting fans in my face.
IT/Software career thread: Invert binary trees for dollars.
- Thread starter Traak
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Guest, it's time once again for the massively important and exciting FoH Asshat Tournament!
Go here and give us your nominations!Who's been the biggest Asshat in the last year? Give us your worst ones!
I can't say it is the same everywhere but the managers and most of the product people sit with the developers at my place
Khane
Got something right about marriage
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I would take any process, mantra or paradigm over this wild west shit I have at my office now. Not because I have to work with other people or code bases that are horrid (I work mostly alone) but because probably 75% of my projects never see the light of day.
Our business analysts are so worthless they just come to us and ask us to build anything one of the business teams says in passing, pretends its mission critical, we finish it, and then the business says "Oh, well we don't have any contracts signed and team X doesn't have the bandwidth to use it. We thought we could but we can't". But in between all that the requirements change about 30 times. The useless scope creep is real and our CIO just makes us do all these meaningless projects anyway because he has no backbone to say no.
It's not that terrible though because most of them are such joke pet projects they take about an hour to code and then I fuck off on RR the rest of the day until they change the reqs requiring another 10 minutes of work.
Our business analysts are so worthless they just come to us and ask us to build anything one of the business teams says in passing, pretends its mission critical, we finish it, and then the business says "Oh, well we don't have any contracts signed and team X doesn't have the bandwidth to use it. We thought we could but we can't". But in between all that the requirements change about 30 times. The useless scope creep is real and our CIO just makes us do all these meaningless projects anyway because he has no backbone to say no.
It's not that terrible though because most of them are such joke pet projects they take about an hour to code and then I fuck off on RR the rest of the day until they change the reqs requiring another 10 minutes of work.
Vinen
God is dead
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Noodleface
A Mod Real Quick
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moontayle
Golden Squire
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Learned two extremely "bad no-no wtf is this shit" things today.
1) Upgrades to any of our android apps are done by uninstalling the old version and installing the new version. A couple apps have attached databases that would get blown away via this method but they're all internal tools that the customers wouldn't use or have access to. Still, I'm going to start finding a different way to do this. It's like using Mjolnir to hammer a nail, excessive and probably unnecessary.
2) They've been releasing the IDE created debug apks as release versions instead of, you know, actual release version apks that are run through proguard. Because "we don't use Play to release". Yeah, but there's a reason you still do it that way. Especially if you value security and don't want someone to easily reverse engineer your shit.
Anyway, plate just got very full.
1) Upgrades to any of our android apps are done by uninstalling the old version and installing the new version. A couple apps have attached databases that would get blown away via this method but they're all internal tools that the customers wouldn't use or have access to. Still, I'm going to start finding a different way to do this. It's like using Mjolnir to hammer a nail, excessive and probably unnecessary.
2) They've been releasing the IDE created debug apks as release versions instead of, you know, actual release version apks that are run through proguard. Because "we don't use Play to release". Yeah, but there's a reason you still do it that way. Especially if you value security and don't want someone to easily reverse engineer your shit.
Anyway, plate just got very full.
Noodleface
A Mod Real Quick
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I've been banging my head against a wall trying to finish this feature i'm adding to BIOS. It relies on another rudimentary feature we implemented in April. So I'm sitting here in my head going "FUCK! WHAT THE FUCK!" thinking I'm the worst programmer in the world when I get a bright idea to test the feature already in BIOS.
Surprise, it doesn't work.
Guess who has to fix it? Me. Back to square one. Thanks for testing your feature, jerk.
Surprise, it doesn't work.
Guess who has to fix it? Me. Back to square one. Thanks for testing your feature, jerk.
Noodleface
A Mod Real Quick
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Please don't do that. Someone who still works at my job thought it was a good idea to make a bunch of test cases with pokemon and mlp variable names. Some of the test cases have "mooseknuckle' and 'camel_toe' for file names. I'm not going to fix them and put my name on that shit in svn. Seems like a smart guy otherwise, just immature and doesn't think twice.
Hey all. Just started my internship at my university. We were given a handful of research projects to choose from. The one I chose was a solo project, for some reason it just stuck out to me. I'll know more details in the next few days but the jist of it is implementing data mining algorithms using this drag and drop programming language called SNAP. Eventually we will build a program and from what I understand, hold a data mining workshop for novice/young programmers. I've been messing around with SNAP and researching basic data mining algorithms. Just wondering if any of you have messed with SNAP. You can run it in your browser if you are curious, it's developed at Berkeley.
Snap! (Build Your Own Blocks) 4.0
Depending on how well I set this up, it could lead up to a full time research position next semester.
Snap! (Build Your Own Blocks) 4.0
Depending on how well I set this up, it could lead up to a full time research position next semester.
Lendarios
Trump's Staff
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Programmers who don't know that you cant store currency on double tends to use them instead of decimals.
Tuco
I got Tuco'd!
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Variable name jokes are only worth making and funny if they are both descriptive and funny. If they don't describe their purpose it's garbage.
Ex:
"Why did you name this class RainbowDash?"
"It's a class that facilitates different colors in a fast way. Can you think of a better name?"
"Damnit, I can't. RainbowDash it is. Fuck."
Ex:
"Why did you name this class RainbowDash?"
"It's a class that facilitates different colors in a fast way. Can you think of a better name?"
"Damnit, I can't. RainbowDash it is. Fuck."
For some reason I kept reading currency as concurrency and I was really confused. Guess its time to clock out.