Marriage and the Power of Divorce

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Frenzied Wombat

Frenzied Wombat

Potato del Grande
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Noodleface_sl said:
My wife tries to make me do everything with her, down to watching her shitty TV shows at night. I explain to her "No, I don't want to watch Castle where every episode is Kate jerking Castle off through his pants and they catch a bad guy in the end." I mean, if I pull out my gaming laptop and play Diablo while she's watching TV and we're in the same room isn't it the same?
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No quality together time isn't just sitting on the couch together, you have to be miserable too. Translation-- since you haven't made any sacrifice by playing Diablo together time doesn't count. And no, the rationale that there will be the same level of communication between you whether you both watch Castle or one of you plays Diablo will fail.
 
Onoes

Onoes

Trakanon Raider
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Well, last Friday (err, friday before last) the girl I had the few week thing contacted me. She told me she made a huge mistake, and wanted to know if I would be interested in dating. I told her no, sorry, but I can't just trust her when she ditched me out of the blue like that. She said she understood and that was that. She contacted me again 5 days later and said she can't stop thinking about sex with me, and that I'm all she can think about, and could we maybe just hang out and get together, and have sex. She stressed she didn't want a fuck buddy, and I stressed I didn't want a commitment. She said thats fine. So, despite me expecting this to not go well, the cock wants what the cock wants. <3

I'm preparing for battle as we speak.

rrr_img_64743.jpg


No doubt this will result in much amusement for you all, and fond memories for myself.
 
Khane

Khane

Got something right about marriage
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14,012
And also, on top of the living thing chaos suggested, try not to die. This bitch is crazy.
 
D

Dabamf_sl

shitlord
1,472
0
Surely everyone can sympathize, but you're being dumb. MAYBE if you were a super cautious and smart guy, you could handle this well enough to have fun and not have something bad happen. But you're not the sharpest tool in the shed. You should be more aware of the dumb shit you have gotten yourself into and realize that this one is bound to end up in disaster.

But please post pics and stories.

Who wants to help me figure odds and then take bets?

4-1 pregnancy
6-1 accused rape
2-1 fake pregnancy
7-1 other male she has enthralled beats his ass
1.5-1 "oh its fine I'm clean we don't need a condom" STD
 
iannis

iannis

Musty Nester
31,351
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Oh, honestly I think the worst thing that's gonna happen to our man is that she's going to go fucking INSANE on him and he's gonna have a genuinely hurtful, and fairly private, flameout on his hands. And he's basically a decent guy so it's going to be hard for him to reconcile the callousness that this is going to create internally in the long term. She's going to accuse him of doing shit that he is quite happily and decisively and purposefully doing. But after he's played out every dark fantasy that she's just barely tolerant enough to indulge him in he's going to start to wonder if the price was too high... and that's when she'll strike. It's instinctive. She's playing the long game.

But you know what? When that time comes, and it will just as surely as he will -- Doesn't matter; had sex. Fair warning has been given.

The gimp mask has already been purchased.
 
Skanda

Skanda

I'm Amod too!
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Dabamf_sl said:
4-1 pregnancy
2-1 fake pregnancy
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First thing that went through my mind when I read his post was "entrapment baby time". Onoes, I hope you're ready for another kid. Maybe you'll get lucky and the punches you suffered to the nuts from that one chick permanently fixed the issue for you.
 
Kirun

Kirun

Buzzfeed Editor
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Dabamf_sl said:
2-1 fake pregnancy
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I'm going to go with "fake pregnancy", but with a twist: She got knocked up by the dude she's been shacking up with(likely loser), but knows that Onoes does relatively well for himself. So, she'll attempt to convince him(likely successfully) that it's his.

Seriously, Onoes, you won't listen, but you're being an idiot about this. The woman is obviously nuts and if your dick isthatstarved for attention, don't you live only a few hours from Vegas?
 
BrutulTM

BrutulTM

Good, bad, I'm the guy with the gun.
<Silver Donator>
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This is starting to sound like bullshit now. If I don't see a picture of those bondage tools at work, I'm saying Onoes is just in need of more attention from Rerolled.
 
Haast

Haast

Lord Nagafen Raider
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Kirun_sl said:
I'm going to go with "fake pregnancy", but with a twist: She got knocked up by the dude she's been shacking up with(likely loser), but knows that Onoes does relatively well for himself. So, she'll attempt to convince him(likely successfully), that it's his.

Seriously, Onoes, you won't listen, but you're being an idiot about this. The woman is obviously nuts and if your dick isthatstarved for attention, don't you live only a few hours from Vegas?
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Kirun and I found something to agree on. This bitch is crazy as shit and is acting shady. I would seriously be concerned about this.
 
D

dolaan_sl

shitlord
62
0
My policy when I was single was: Any time you are wasting on this girl could be spent finding someone better. Now I am not saying to not go have fun, but don't waste time.
 
Khane

Khane

Got something right about marriage
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Don't waste condoms either, she isn't worth the condom. I'm sure you could talk her into Plan B or an abortion.
 
Onoes

Onoes

Trakanon Raider
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Should I just add "I had a vasectomy, I can't get anyone pregnant." as a signature? I swear we have gone over this a dozen times. Do I need to post a pic of the scar on my nuts?
 
Big Phoenix

Big Phoenix

Pronouns: zie/zhem/zer
<Gold Donor>
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Skanda_sl said:
First thing that went through my mind when I read his post was "entrapment baby time". Onoes, I hope you're ready for another kid. Maybe you'll get lucky and the punches you suffered to the nuts from that one chick permanently fixed the issue for you.
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Just wait til you see shes on her period to end it.
 
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