Marriage and the Power of Divorce

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Onoes

Trakanon Raider
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No idea, she gave me one of the best blowjobs of my entire life last night though, so all is forgiven :p
 

lindz

#DDs
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What's the deal with her not knowing how to be on top? Is this a common thing?
I had no idea how to be on top until my husband. It's never been a position that I particularly enjoy so I never really did it much before. I'm more of a doggie style gal.
 

Tarrant

<Prior Amod>
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My wife still is a bit awkward on top but has improved a lot over the years. She's always really self conscious about it too but she's got to be pretty good.

Apparently it hits things at different anglesand it takes time to figure out how to get it to hit those right places while on top from what I've surmised.

Anways

Have you asked if this is something she normally does? The whole hooking up while on the road?
 

Khane

Got something right about marriage
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The amount of apathy towards fucking a married woman in this thread disgusts me.
 

Tarrant

<Prior Amod>
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It's on the spouse that cheats, not the person who they are fucking. If this chick wasn't going to fuck Onoes, she was just going to fuck someone else. That's how it works.

My first wife cheated on me, I have no ill will towards the dude she did it with. She's the one who broke my trust. Same goes in this situation.
 

BoldW

Molten Core Raider
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Why is it Onoes job to uphold whatever arrangement towards fidelity this couple has? It isn't. Should guys be giving women questionnaires and psych tests prior to copulating to make sure they aren't married and don't have daddy issues, aren't doing it as rebound sex, to get back at someone, etc, etc? Onoes isn't in a relationship. He's not breaking any rules. His conscience should be clean. If he had any thoughts about getting into a relationship with this woman, then I'm sure everyone here would cry out for him to stop and run away (which he'd probably ignore).

If he feels bad about it he can find the husband's phone number and text him when he leaves the conference to let him know his wife's a cheating cunt.

ALL fault belongs with the woman. As a man who has been cheated on, I have no animosity towards the guy, aside from the fact that he was a "friend", which is different than Random_Onoes_01, because he and I had a relationship.
 

Tarrant

<Prior Amod>
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Onoes, this is for you for future reference.
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Khane

Got something right about marriage
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Like I said, I find the apathy towards knowingly fucking a married woman disgusting.
 

chaos

Buzzfeed Editor
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I do think it is kind of shitty, like if a person I knew did that I would judge the shit out of them and ensure they knew it. But all in all it isnt like he is carrying on a relationship with this woman and wedging in on a family, and it certainly isn't as if he is the only one she has done this with. So I'm really more surprised to see the amount of vocal disgust with this than I am to see the apathy.
 

Tarrant

<Prior Amod>
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Like I said, I find the apathy towards knowingly fucking a married woman disgusting.
And I think your disgust is misplaced and pointless. Glad we're all on the same page.

For the record, I'm not all about saying it's fine to have sex with people you know what are married, all I'm saying is it's on the married person, not the person fucking them. It wouldn't even be an issue had the married one kept their pants on.
 

Khane

Got something right about marriage
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Because it only takes one to tango right? I hate apathy in general, it's such a useless thing "Well if I don't do it someone else is gonna". What a shitty point of view. Hold yourself to a higher standard and don't do things that are morally reprehensible.
 

Tarrant

<Prior Amod>
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Because it only takes one to tango right? I hate apathy in general, it's such a useless thing "Well if I don't do it someone else is gonna". What a shitty point of view. Hold yourself to a higher standard and don't do things that are morally reprehensible.
Like I said, I think your disgust is misplaced and pointless.
 

Khane

Got something right about marriage
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I don't want to fall into the analogy trap, but how could you honestly say the onus falls solely on the married party? You're making a conscious choice to become an interloper. Are there not enough single women? Where do you even draw the line? Is it OK if you were just an innocent bystander and the married woman made all the moves? Is it OK if you purposely tried to seduce her? I can't understand how you blame what happened to you solely on your ex-wife and don't blame the man she was with at all. It's hard to respect a man with an outlook like that.
 

Tarrant

<Prior Amod>
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Well, your first mistake was thinking I cared if people on the internet respect me.

I kid, I kid. I actually do care about how most here think of me, I like this community a great deal.

Anyways, I married my wife because I trusted her. I didn't marry anyone else, I wasn't friends with the guy....we had no relationship (nohomo) previous to that. Do I think it's low to do that? Sure. Am I mad at him? No, because I placed no trust in him, I placed it in the person I married. She mad the conscious decision to break that trust, she made the decision to slide a cock into her that wasn't mine. Had she not made those decisions, had she not been the one to go out and look for someone to fuck, there never would have been a problem.

That's on her. If she hadn't fucked that guy, she would have fucked another. How do I know that? Because that's what she did....and some fat chick too.

My being angry at all those people serves no purpose, hell, even being mad at her serves no purpose other than making me feel something at the thought of having a level of trust that deep, when we had two kids together, broken. Which is something you SHOULD feel in that situation.

In the end, she is the one who made the decision and not only that, she planned ahead of time to do it. Much like Onoes chick up above, she planned that shit out. My ex wife literally went out of her way to break my trust. I'm mad at her for that, not the dude (and fat chick) who she fucked.
 

BoldW

Molten Core Raider
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Again, the only one being immoral here is the lady, assuming her husband doesn't know about it and would be against it. You're the one placing your morality on other people, and I guess that's my point. As I said, I probably (hasn't happened so who knows) wouldn't have sex with a married woman, especially if I knew her husband would disapprove. But tell us more about your morality. After my first divorce, my ex-wife remarried, and we were still great friends. She came to visit once and gave me the best BJ I've ever had. Was that immoral?

Now, the new husband had wanted to see her give another man a BJ (weird but I try not to judge too much), and she was down with it but wanted to do it with someone she was comfortable with, hence me. In this case, I don't find it the slightest bit immoral as all parties were consenting (I even spoke to the guy afterwards about it). Lucky for me, the video camera didn't work so it was kind of a bonus. But, not knowing these things, one would consider it immoral. Now, tell us, how far does a man need to go before having sex to have a clear conscious? Sex by itself is not an immoral act. The woman was being immoral if she broke her vows/arrangement. Onoes did no such thing.

As an aside I would recommend, for practical purposes, that Onoes tries to stay away from married women in general, though, cause some guy not as even-headed as we is going to find him one day.
 

Khane

Got something right about marriage
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This conversation is going off the rails real quick. BoldW, congratulations on the cuckolding but that's not the type of thing I am talking about. I don't know, maybe that woman and her husband do have an open marriage. But even that doesn't sit right with me, simply because it's hard to believe anyone is capable of keeping sex purely physical with every person they ever sleep with who isn't their wife/husband. It's an open invitation for drama and tempting fate, but that's a different topic of discussion. I don't believe a man or woman should stick their nose where it doesn't belong and I think a man should have enough self respect to hold himself to a certain standard. We obviously disagree that it's not an issue for a man to sleep with a married woman. You two think it's all on the married party and the other participant has no responsibility for the consequences of their actions. That's ridiculous.

There are certain things the two of you as adults with a conscience wouldn't do. It's remarkable the things I've seen Tarrant take issue with and infract people for on these forums yet this doesn't bother him. I think he's desensitized himself to it because of what happened, which I guess I can't blame him, but I hold people accountable for their actions. I can't get behind thinking it's A-OK to sleep with a married woman just because I am not married and haven't made a promise to someone. I have way too much self esteem for that. It shows a complete and utter lack of respect for your fellow man. It's selfish and abhorrent.
 

Kirun

Buzzfeed Editor
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The onus isn't on Onoes, myself, nor anyone else to stop all the ills of the world, or prevent people from being immoral scumbags. As long as I'm keeping my side of the street clean, why should anybody be held partially responsible for somebody's choice to act wrongly. Onoes made no such vow to this woman, nor did he make one to her husband. If Onoes hadactivelypursued this chick, sure, that's inching into scumbag territory. However, like Tarrant said, even then, the husband of this chick placed his trust/faith in her, not in Onoes. Do you walk down the street assuming everybody has a "responsibility" not to want to fuck your wife? That's not how it works.